Hypothetical - their dead relative, not seen for 5 years, how sympathetic are you?

londonsurrey

I would be interested in what the general consensus is:

If you knew of someone who hadn't visited their OAP relative for five years, and they wailing about being all upset as they've found out that the relative had just been found dead in their flat, apparently having died 4 years ago,
what would your opinion be of their being upset?

This probably needs rewording. Please feel free to reword it.

Jinx

Am I understanding this right - the deceased person died 4 years ago but has just been found??

Id understand the person was upset but if they hadnt seen each other in 5 years it would be an acknowledgement rather than full on sympathy as they obviously didnt care that much...... (unless they lived on the other side of the world type of thing)

sweaty_betty

londonsurrey wrote: »

I would be interested in what the general consensus is:

If you knew of someone who hadn't visited their OAP relative for five years, and they were all upset about finding out that the relative had just been found dead in their flat, apparently having died 4 years ago,
what would your opinion be of their being upset?

This probably needs rewording. Please feel free to reword it.

If that were me, I'd be upset. Especially if that person had been lying dead in their flat for 4 years. I'd be consumed with guilt that I'd not been around (either to see them when alive or to find them sooner - 4 years is a very long time). In these busy times it's easier for people to fall off our radars or to assume that others are looking out for them - and always a shock when that turns out to not be the case.

londonsurrey

Jinx wrote: »

Am I understanding this right - the deceased person died 4 years ago but has just been found??

Yes, that's the hypothetical situation.

j.e.j.

It depends what the reason is that they've not been in touch with the OAP relative. I think I would be sympathetic, though. I wouldn't like to imagine the er.. smell of the body if it's been lying there for 4 years :eek: How horrible to imagine a relative has been left like that.

lostinrates

londonsurrey wrote: »

Yes, that's the hypothetical situation.

Is there a hypothetical background as to why they have not seen each other for five years?

I can imagine more than one potential reason for not being in touch and still being understandably distraught.

balletshoes

I would be outwardly sympathetic - they could be feeling racked with guilt that they hadn't been in touch more often/done more/been around more, and that could be why they are upset now.

OllysMum_2

I just heard yesterday that a university friend of mine had lain dead in his flat for four days before being found and I found that pretty upsetting. If this was a family member I'd be consumed with guilt and very distressed. Unimaginably so.

I have quite a large, spread out family and we can go years between seeing each other. Don't think anyone feels abandoned and we usually just pick up where we left off. All families are different, people are different, reactions to grief are different.

Person_one

londonsurrey wrote: »

Yes, that's the hypothetical situation.

Its very specific for a hypothetical...

claire16c

Im sure I read a story on the daily mail about something along these lines a couple of days ago.

Person_one

claire16c wrote: »

Im sure I read a story on the daily mail about something along these lines a couple of days ago.

There's a film about a woman who was dead in a North London flat for years, surrounded by Christmas presents she was wrapping. Its a very sad and mysterious story and I think the film is on the telly soon.

http://www.guardian.co.uk/film/2011/oct/09/joyce-vincent-death-mystery-documentary