How much spending money?

Morganarla

FatVonD wrote: »

Ideally it would be best for DH to ask her mum what the score is but communication is not his strong point!

Well I'm afraid he is an adult, and strong point or not, he needs to communicate regarding his child.

What if she has too little money and is stuck/embarrassed? (I was in a similar position at 14 and it was horrible, never forgot it). All because your DH's strong point isn't communication?

Seriously, he needs to have that conversation.

thehappybutterfly

thehappybutterfly wrote: »

I would assume that the extended family would not be expecting any extras towards food and accommodation. They offered to take her on holiday - it would be a bit rude to then turn round and say 'Oh by the way, we need £200 towards the cost" . What happens if you don't have that kind of money?

onlyroz wrote: »

I don't think it's a good idea to assume anything. She certainly wouldn't want to arrive in Spain with enough money for a few icecreams and then find out that her meals hadn't been covered.

FatVonD wrote: »

We don't...!

My point exactly - they should have run this past FatVonD first to make sure it would be OK - either, 'yes she can go', or 'no I can't afford it'. This has put Fat in a very awkward position.

You have no choice but to ask what they expect in terms of money.

loracan1

FatVonD wrote: »

but, as her mum can't afford to take them this year, one of the aunts has paid for DSD to join them (sharing a room with a cousin) and DSD's mum has asked DH to give her spending money.

I think this is a key point - they're taking her because her mum can't afford to go away. I doubt they're expecting a couple of hundred quid for keep and just want some for 'her to be able to spend' on sundries along with her cousin. How much? anything between 30 or 100 depending on how much can be afforded.

victory

thehappybutterfly wrote: »

You have no choice but to ask what they expect in terms of money.

I agree, never assume, always communicate, the more questions asked and the more informed you have leaves less room for misunderstandings, resentment or feelings of being taken for granted:D

victory

I agree that 10 euros a day if affordable would be fine, last time we went it was very striking how much prices had gone up for a coca cola, ice cream and such like, really not a cheapie sunny hol now the euro is here:D

claire16c

FatVonD wrote: »

They aren't really into excursions, I think they spend their time at the beach or around the pool!

What about if they visit somewhere like a waterpark, zoo etc? That could be £20 for stuff like that even if they don't go on any organised type stuff.

rachbc

£100 spending money plus I would also speak to the aunt/ mum about her meals. I would give some money to the adults to cover this seperately form the spending money

Treevo

£150-200 spending money for your step daughter and her mother can pay for her food as she's the one who's allowed this to happen without bothering to consult her daughter's father.

dancingfairy

Wow, a very crazy situation. If it were me/my family I would have thought 30-50 pounds for the odd icecream/souvenier etc.
I hope that the mother and the rest of the family has had a convesation about who is providing meals/money for day trips etc as this really should have been thought about. It really is up to the mother to clarify with the extended family the terms of the offer and she really shouldn't be springing it on your OH and expecting him to pay for her meals/day trips etc. Expecting him to contribute money for icecreams, etc is a bit off without consulting him as well.
You have a rough idea for figures (based on what you think) and what people on here have said but really your OH needs to have a proper conversation with the family (and ideally shouldn't be pushed into spending vast sums (ie seveal hundred pounds) on a holiday that he appears to have had no say in)
I hope that an amicable conclusion can be reached (and your OH needs to make it clear that he doesn't have money just lying around and that whilst he will contribute to the esentials etc he can't just provide money for holidays etc with little /no warning).
Good luck
df

elmer

I didnt let my son go on holiday with his friend as we couldnt get any idea of how much money would be required from the parents,
one said "oh nothing we'll pay ", and the husband, when asked seperately, wanted a contribution to the petrol which he didnt even have to pay for...,
so we decided that our rather shy son would end up in too much of a pickle over the money, as they are a free spending family and he would feel embarrassed if he was asked to pay for things that he didnt have enough money for.

He was relieved not to go too

elmer