Frustrated parent

thehappybutterfly

chiefpossession wrote: »

Can I give a teacher's perspective here?

At this stage your daughter needs help in organising herself - not to be organised. We do often have problems with students who are micro-managed so much that they almost become unable to do anything independently (for example - Miss, I've come to the end of the page - and they then need me to tell them to turn over:eek:)

Homework helps students to work independently and think about what they have learned without the crutch of their class mates and teacher to reinforce what they are doing all the time. Really good students often need constant reassurance in class because they are used to being checked all the time. This causes real problems as they get older because they are unable to revise independently because someone else has always been responsible for their learning.

We try and get our students to use the 4Bs - Brain (their own knowledge), Book (classwork, internet), Buddy (contact their classmates - how have they approached a piece of work), Boss (go back to the teacher for help)

This is really hard (I am a parent too) - you need enough control to make sure that she does her homework to the best of her ability (and that means using resources to help when she is stuck) and yet not being the one who is responsible for her doing her homework (or, heaven forbid, doing it for her).

Be interested; be disappointed if homework looks rushed; look at the comments her teachers make about homework (or class work in general) and discuss them with her; negotiate her best time to do homework (I need some time to unwind before I tackle my own); and reward improvement.

Nice to get a teacher's view!

z.n

In our house:no chance of any sleepover unless there are at least two full nights to recover before school (two kids helps here as they can see the other being horrid through tiredness). Also, no tv on a school night unless all homework is done (including stuff not yet due in) to avoid the horror of 10 items of homework due or overdue on a Sunday evening. (Let the horror happen just once) No screens for an hour before bed. Keep an eye out for an 'excellent' or similar remark and praise to the skies- and hope the warm glow of success encourages self motivation (it does). Ensure all homework is properly marked by teacher-otherwise what was the point of it. Also, I'm not against a small reward on completion of particularly nasty homework task-hot chocolate,mad dance or similar (go to bed on a good note with the sense of a job well done.) Do boring homework in chunks and celebrate each completed chunk. Teach them how to cut corners/when to compromise on quality if they are tired (eg the make a poster/do a survey nonsense) but recognise when to do something properly (eg maths/english etc.) Know when to put in a note telling the teacher more help is needed-but provide help at home too. Hone all lie detection skills (siblings help here as they spot a misdirection a mile off to spot when homework remains uncompleted as the growing pile can become insurmountable very quickly.) Advocate delayed gratification ("How long until you finish homework-shall we say 40 minutes- I thought we could catch up on Merlin afterwards"-then be prepared to suggest a few improvements if necessary before tv is allowed) Basically, family life is organised around homework (subject always to the odd really bad day.)I am not there to do their homework for them but I make it my responsibility to ensure the window of opportunity is there and that they know how I have managed to create it-so they can learn to do it themselves. I do expect the teachers to help me out by expecting decent quality homework handed in on time-otherwise I suspect it would be like pushing on an open door.

Mojisola

z.n wrote: »

In our house:no chance of any sleepover unless there are at least two full nights to recover before school (two kids helps here as they can see the other being horrid through tiredness).

Also, no tv on a school night unless all homework is done (including stuff not yet due in) to avoid the horror of 10 items of homework due or overdue on a Sunday evening. (Let the horror happen just once)

No screens for an hour before bed.

Keep an eye out for an 'excellent' or similar remark and praise to the skies- and hope the warm glow of success encourages self motivation (it does).

Ensure all homework is properly marked by teacher-otherwise what was the point of it.

Also, I'm not against a small reward on completion of particularly nasty homework task-hot chocolate,mad dance or similar (go to bed on a good note with the sense of a job well done.)

Do boring homework in chunks and celebrate each completed chunk.

Teach them how to cut corners/when to compromise on quality if they are tired (eg the make a poster/do a survey nonsense) but recognise when to do something properly (eg maths/english etc.)

Know when to put in a note telling the teacher more help is needed-but provide help at home too.

Hone all lie detection skills (siblings help here as they spot a misdirection a mile off to spot when homework remains uncompleted as the growing pile can become insurmountable very quickly.)

Advocate delayed gratification ("How long until you finish homework-shall we say 40 minutes- I thought we could catch up on Merlin afterwards"-then be prepared to suggest a few improvements if necessary before tv is allowed)

What a brilliant list! If mine were still of an age, I'd be printing that off.