Could you be that honest? ...

victory

I was watching a tv show the girl is followed around by a tv crew and goes back to her old haunts, boyfriends ,bosses, family and friends and they tell her where she went wrong, her mistakes, how her behaviour upset so and so, why she was sacked/ dumped etc

She looked horrified/ tearful/surprised/upset/lost by all this outpouring of honesty:eek:

She is obviously supposed to learn from the experience and better herself, change her ways in the future but she looked so hurt and wounded.

So could you/would be so honest?

Is it not best to just white lie to protect people's feelings?

thunderbird

sounds like a pointless exercise - what dreadful programme is that?

personally I don't have ex's, bosses who sacked me - so wouldn't work with me!:rotfl:

Mojisola

The things people will submit to so that they get on television often amazes me!

an9i77

It reminds of a time when a 'friend' thought he was doing the right thing by sending me an email detailing all my faults and issues over the years of knowing me, including his assessment of problems other people had had with me, because he wanted to let me know so that I could 'sort myself out'. This all started because I had not got on with his girlfriend who was a complete !!!!! and probably jealous of my friendship with him, and it had become an issue, and he clearly wanted to put her in the position of being the innocent one.
I was absolutely devastated and we have never been friends since. I still feel angry to this day.
This kind of thing can leave deep wounds.
Just because someone does not like a person does not mean there is anything wrong with that person.
I don't like apples. Doesn't mean there's anything wrong with apples.

Macca83_2

That sounds pretty horrendous. A person could go either way. It could be a fantastic eye opening experience, that enriches your life and you take alot away from it. Or it could leave you emotionally destroyed.

The thing is these ex bosses and partners are working from their own perspectives, with their own agendas and ideas. Doesn't make them particularly reliable.

Macca83_2

an9i77 wrote: »

I don't like apples.

How dare you! Haha

victory

an9i77 wrote: »

It reminds of a time when a 'friend' thought he was doing the right thing by sending me an email detailing all my faults and issues over the years of knowing me, including his assessment of problems other people had had with me, because he wanted to let me know so that I could 'sort myself out'. This all started because I had not got on with his girlfriend who was a complete !!!!! and probably jealous of my friendship with him, and it had become an issue, and he clearly wanted to put her in the position of being the innocent one.
I was absolutely devastated and we have never been friends since. I still feel angry to this day.
This kind of thing can leave deep wounds.
Just because someone does not like a person does not mean there is anything wrong with that person.
I don't like apples. Doesn't mean there's anything wrong with apples.

omg that sounds horrendous:eek: his thoughts would not be everyone's so even though he saw it that way that does not mean it defines you

an9i77

victory wrote: »

omg that sounds horrendous:eek: his thoughts would not be everyone's so even though he saw it that way that does not mean it defines you

No and other people were not happy he'd involved them. Clearly he had an ulterior motive which was to defend his girlfriend from any criticism, which helped me not to take it all to heart.
I think he genuinely believed he was trying to help me out though! Patronising so and so.

DevilsAdvocate1

an9i77 wrote: »

It reminds of a time when a 'friend' thought he was doing the right thing by sending me an email detailing all my faults and issues over the years of knowing me, including his assessment of problems other people had had with me, because he wanted to let me know so that I could 'sort myself out'. This all started because I had not got on with his girlfriend who was a complete !!!!! and probably jealous of my friendship with him, and it had become an issue, and he clearly wanted to put her in the position of being the innocent one.
I was absolutely devastated and we have never been friends since. I still feel angry to this day.
This kind of thing can leave deep wounds.
Just because someone does not like a person does not mean there is anything wrong with that person.
I don't like apples. Doesn't mean there's anything wrong with apples.

I've had that happen too and I was devastated. She was my best friend, or so I thought. We saw each other loads and were really close. One day, out of the blue, she rang me up and pulled my personality apart.

She went through pretty much everything which had happened in the 2 years we had been friends. The card I sent when her gran died was wrong. She had stored up things I had said in response to other things. Everything I said was wrong. I was so gobsmacked I could not hang up the phone and kept listening. I think she rang me at work knowing I could not say much in reply to her. It took an hour to go through how bad I was.

It had a massive effect on my confidence. At the end of the call she told me that I was the bad person and I could not tell anyone what she had said as she had only been saying the truth. If I told others then they would think she was the bad person and that was wrong. If I wanted to be a good person then I would keep quiet.

I only told my boyfriend. I did not tell any of our mutual friends, which meant that I became distant from them. Three years later, one of them rang me up and said "You don't have to tell me what happened between you and C, she did the same to me yesterday".

Some time later I found out that this is a regular thing she does. She always likes to have exactly 3 friends (I had always thought this was strange). When she finds someone new to form a friendship with, she rings one of her existing friends and tears them apart. During the 2 years we were friends, I had seen others come and go and had not realised why they had fallen out. She had done the same to them as she did to me.

A nasty piece of work.

I think this program is a terrible idea. While I'm over it now it I had months where I kept crying.

System

Sounds like character assasination to me. Awful, awful idea.

BitterAndTwisted

It sounds like programme-makers are getting pretty desperate for ideas if they are pitching such vile and cruel exploitation to the commissioners. That the commissioners have no taste or compassion is no surprise at all. That people would subject themselves to such appalling exploitation is no surprise either.

If any of us watch such programmes and find them objectionable we should get in contact with the broadcasters and tell them so. I reckon that's the only way to stem this tide of completely tasteless nastiness.

I'm glad to say I don't understand why people would willingly involve themselves in the making of such programmes or watch them either.