Dilemma; Maintenance Or Savings

Poppie68

Surely the PWC doesnt' wait until the NRP has paid CM before she provides food, clothes etc for the child? This money would already be spent on the child and the CM will be recouping some of that money back, therefore what she spends the CM on is her business and not open to dictation from the NRP.

HappyMJ

kingfisherblue wrote: »

It isn't up to the NRP to trust the PWC or not. They have no control over what CM is spent on.

You see it all the time on these boards with NRP's complaining the PWC is living life really comfortably and spending nothing on the children.... yes I know it isn't really the case... The NRP then gets annoyed and then declares themselves self employed...or even unemployed and stops paying any child support. If the PWC who gets nothing is being accused of wasting it then the PWC could say ...well how about a gift card that can't be used on tobacoo, alcohol or gambling. At least the PWC woud get something rather than nothing.

You could take a self employed NRP to court but the court has to believe the figures supplied to HMRC as proof of income...although as we all know these figures are under declared.

It's an option....and it's only used if the NRP and PWC agree amongst themselves without CSA help.

clearingout

I really do think it's a viable option for some people and it doesn't have to be controllig - you can offset what you pay for and buy in the supermarket to some extent to free up your cash. It's a 'whatever works' situation, I think. I could live with it to a point. But then my ex won't pay so ANYTHING would work for me, really!

stargazer59

clearingout wrote: »

I really do think it's a viable option for some people and it doesn't have to be controllig - you can offset what you pay for and buy in the supermarket to some extent to free up your cash. It's a 'whatever works' situation, I think. I could live with it to a point. But then my ex won't pay so ANYTHING would work for me, really!

I see your point in a way but what about people like me? I am disabled and do all my shopping online, as an MSE'er i look for the best deals, discount codes, use Topcashback etc, which enables me to spread my money further. In fact my whole Christmas spend on my son was due to TCB e vouchers.

I see it as a way to control the PWC by dictating where and on what the money is spent. If i suddenly had to get a taxi or whatever in an emergency i could not just hand them a Sainsburys Card in payment.

HappyMJ

stargazer59 wrote: »

I see your point in a way but what about people like me? I am disabled and do all my shopping online, as an MSE'er i look for the best deals, discount codes, use Topcashback etc, which enables me to spread my money further. In fact my whole Christmas spend on my son was due to TCB e vouchers.

I see it as a way to control the PWC by dictating where and on what the money is spent. If i suddenly had to get a taxi or whatever in an emergency i could not just hand them a Sainsburys Card in payment.

No...you would have your other money for that.

If your NRP is co-operating then you have no problem at all. It's only really for NRP's which are absolutely convinced all the PWC does with the money is buy ciggies, drinks and gambles the rest away so declares no income so they don't have to pay anything to PWC relying on housing benefit to house the child and child benefit and child tax credits to be enough to feed and clothe their child.

stargazer59

HappyMJ wrote: »

No...you would have your other money for that.

If your NRP is co-operating then you have no problem at all. It's only really for NRP's which are absolutely convinced all the PWC does with the money is buy ciggies, drinks and gambles the rest away so declares no income so they don't have to pay anything to PWC relying on housing benefit to house the child and child benefit and child tax credits to be enough to feed and clothe their child.

My NRP is not co operating, never has. I have to rely on my benefits to feed and clothe myself and my child, also to get to my hospital appointments etc. i wish i had money left to drink and gamble away!

No way would i want him dictating anything in my life.

labyrinth84

Typed this up...then it disappeared- frustrating!

The majority of PWC do put their childrens needs first and make sure they have what they need so not only is it rather controlling, as said- many buy online; ebay etc!

We despair at the fact that PWC is dressed very well and the kids are in too small clothes so we buy the clothes too. Who's to say if we paid in clothing vouchers, the PWC wouldn't just spend it on herself anyway? If a PWC takes care of herself first, then that will happen regardless of how it is paid. I've wasted far too much of my time ranting about our experience with PWC, and given myself frown lines!

My new attitude is to mind my own! We pay the CM payments, we buy the clothes, we pay £90 a weekend to collect the kids we DO what we can for the kids, and because of that the kids have what they need. So what that I think the PWC isn't doing her duty as a mother? I'm doing what I can as a future step-mother, thats all I need to know. Is she going to change her ways, because I think her mothering skills don't match my own? Nope!

Schools are observant...if they see an unclean, underfed/overfed, unhappy, uncared for child they will alert SS.

So, new outlook for 2013 as a NRPP....help partner support his kids, and sleep easy knowing he does. Watch what goes on in my household, not in another .Unless negligence is happening...keep nose out

FBaby

I can see both positions and it very much depends on the actual amount of maintenance. Let's face it, kids are expensive when we want to offer them a nice upbringing rather than just the minimum they require (which parent, nrp or pwc only cares to offer the strict minimum if they can genuinely afford more?).

The reality is that in some cases, the maintenance the nrp is expected to pay (based in csa figures) will hardly cover the costs of the children to the pwc. Now some pwcs will get much benefits to cover it, others won't, and others will even lose CB. For these nrps to make a fuss over wanting to know what the money is spent on is very much an insult to the pwc.

However, I can totally understand that when an nrp provides £600 in maintenance for children who don't require childcare (the most expensive child-related cost), they would be slightly more concerned at how the money is being spent. In this instance, I don't understand pwc who feel they have a moral rights to dispose of the money as they wish without any account to how the money is spent on the children.

wayne0

PreludeForTimeFeelers wrote: »

What do people think about the pre-payment cards? I'm not too sure about my feelings...I think there's still a control element for the NRP there.

well, for every 100 i load at work on a prepay asda card i get an extra fiver. (5% extra)

i proposed this to ex so she had MORE money to spend on son, she didnt go for this. despite the only thing the money not being able to be spent on being fuel station purchases and tabaco.

same with the sainsbury one.

If i lived nearer to either store myself i would use them, but the extra cash doesnt cover the fuel to get there so :P

wayne0

HappyMJ wrote: »

PWC relying on housing benefit to house the child and child benefit and child tax credits to be enough to feed and clothe their child.

and understanding that NOT ALL PWC get these benefits... IF THEY ARE ELEGIBLE im sure they will still claim - and still be elegible despite ANY CSA payments.

any money PAID in CSA payments have no effect on benefit liability for benefit purposes...