Dilemma; Maintenance Or Savings

PreludeForTimeFeelers

Crellow4 wrote: »

While maintenance arrangements are outside of the CSA, you and your ex can do whatever suits you BOTH. Child Maintenance Options are currently running a scheme with Sainsburys where the paying parent 'loads' a pre payment card for groceries and clothes - could be an option in your case?

What do people think about the pre-payment cards? I'm not too sure about my feelings...I think there's still a control element for the NRP there.

HappyMJ

PreludeForTimeFeelers wrote: »

What do people think about the pre-payment cards? I'm not too sure about my feelings...I think there's still a control element for the NRP there.

If NRP and PWC agree and PWC actually shops at the shop and not at an alternative store like Aldi then why not. It might prevent NRP from not paying anything at all...getting a prepaid shopping card is much better than nothing at all especially if NRP genuinely thinks that PWC wastes it all on scratch cards, lottery tickets, cigarettes...etc...and not actually spending it on the child.

shell_542

PreludeForTimeFeelers wrote: »

What do people think about the pre-payment cards? I'm not too sure about my feelings...I think there's still a control element for the NRP there.

I think if I were the PWC I would say "Get stuffed! I can't afford to shop in Sainsbury's!"

shoe*diva79

shell_542 wrote: »

I think if I were the PWC I would say "Get stuffed! I can't afford to shop in Sainsbury's!"

Agreed! I shop where I can get deals. Clothing in Sainsburys is expensive as well. I can get 3 outfits in Primark for my youngest for the same cost as 1 outfit in Sainsburys!

HappyMJ

shoe*diva79 wrote: »

Agreed! I shop where I can get deals. Clothing in Sainsburys is expensive as well. I can get 3 outfits in Primark for my youngest for the same cost as 1 outfit in Sainsburys!

Primark does gift cards too... Would a regular gift card for Primark be acceptable?

This all really depends on NRP and PWC. If NRP trusts PWC to not spend it on rubbish then a gift card won't be neccessary.

clearingout

PreludeForTimeFeelers wrote: »

What do people think about the pre-payment cards? I'm not too sure about my feelings...I think there's still a control element for the NRP there.

Well, as my ex doesn't pay maintenance, I'd be grateful for it and I have a Sainsbury's within walking distance. It doesn't sell clothes, however. I do think 'in-kind' contributions can solve the issue of 'she spends it all on clubbing and vodka' and I have no real objection to assuming it's 'I have to pay £400 a month maintenance, here's £400 on a gift card'. What I wouldn't accept is his full maintenance liability at Sainsbury's but if he were to give me Tesco or Asda and it includes petrol, toys, stamps and electrical goods, that would probably be fine as I could juggle everything around and use 'my' money to cover my bills.

There would need to be some kind of limit - maybe 75% of the total liablity up to a maximum of....£400 a month? You need cash to pay childcare, activities etc. Again, I would accept the activities and even childcare being paid directly by my ex so money didn't need to exchange hands but he won't do it.

There is a need for NRPs here to take care in making assumptions about PWC - I certainly don't have my utility bills on prepayment meters, for example and fingers crossed never will have. There is also a need to realise that not everyone has the shop near to them, or can access public transport to get to the shop or indeed, can find the time to get to the shop if they work full-time and don't have transport - I know my Tesco is about 6 miles away and I simply couldn't carry the shopping I need for the 4 of us on the bus (even if there was one going door to door which there isn't). The element of control, then as you say Prelude, is a worry. For example, if you give control of which shop they want to use to the NRP, I can see my NRP choosing the one that is furthest away and most difficult to get to!

It is certainly something to consider and I wouldn't dismiss it out of hand that's for sure.

shoe*diva79

HappyMJ wrote: »

Primark does gift cards too... Would a regular gift card for Primark be acceptable?

This all really depends on NRP and PWC. If NRP trusts PWC to not spend it on rubbish then a gift card won't be neccessary.

No because i dont spend a regular amount of money in there for my DD. i can kit her out for summer for £60. Same as winter. So £120 (give or take) a year on clothes...

shoe*diva79

To be honest, its none of the NRP business what I spend the CM on. Our daughter is well clothed, well fed, does 3 activities a week, has a warm home to live in, more then enough toys to play with. If I spend my household pot (in which CM goes into) in Primark or Armarni its my business. If he thinks our daughter is neglected then I would be happy for SS to pay us a visit to put his mind at rest.

I actually do a lot, in fact most, of any kind of shopping online going through a cashback site to get things a little cheaper so personally a gift card would not suit my families lifestyle. Plus, I am quite capable of being ale to run a household and bring up children without a control freak dictating where I shop and how much I spend!

kingfisherblue

HappyMJ wrote: »

Primark does gift cards too... Would a regular gift card for Primark be acceptable?

This all really depends on NRP and PWC. If NRP trusts PWC to not spend it on rubbish then a gift card won't be neccessary.

It isn't up to the NRP to trust the PWC or not. They have no control over what CM is spent on.

My ex, when taken to court by the CSA, said that he was giving the cash to the kids each week (he wasn't), as he didn't trust me to spend it on them. My kids are well dressed, clean, well fed, and attend a number of clubs that they want to go to. I don't drink, smoke, take drugs, wear fancy clothes, or spend much money on myself - and he knew that.

The courts quite correctly ruled that he should pay me directly. If my ex had any control over what the money was spent on, we would have a house full of !!!!. I don't want to spend cash on a second hand playstation that hasn't been tested to see if it is working - if I have a bit of spare cash, I would rather take the kids to the nearby interactive science museum for the day, as I know they enjoy this. Or I would save up towards a summer holiday. I wouldn't put it on a credit card like my ex.

stargazer59

PreludeForTimeFeelers wrote: »

What do people think about the pre-payment cards? I'm not too sure about my feelings...I think there's still a control element for the NRP there.

Have to say i see it as controlling, why on earth should i be dictated to as to where and what i buy?

( that is if i ever get any)