I am so tired

vivmagb

My husband who is 70 was diagnosed with bowel cancer last march. When everyone found out, they were sympathetic and assured me they were all there for us and would help in any way they could. Where are they now? The little help I did get and it was little has disappeared, its seems that everyone has got used to the word cancer and we no longer need the support, even if it is only moral support. He has had the chemo and radio therapy, the surgery and is now back on chemo until the end of March. I feel so tired and would really appreciate someone cooking me a meal, even if it was only egg and chips! If you know of anyone in this position, bake them a cake or make them a casserole, it really could make their day.

McKneff

:bdaycake:

Especially for you,:)

hope everything works well for you both.

vivmagb

Thanks, that made me smile!

Desperate_Housewife_2-2

aw had to post a reply vivmagb, so sorry to hear about you and your husband. I always feel for the carers as they get put on and ignored while saving the country millions in unpaid salaries for caring for their sick relatives.

Could you go to the drs and see if there is anything that can be done to help? I dont know how ill your husband is but would respite care be appropriate?

Will he be in hospital for chemo or as a daycase? If he is in hospital you could visit alternate days to give yourself a break and order a takeaway in! Sometimes a pyjama day does you the world of good.

Sorry its hard for you and hope things improve

missile

Sorry to hear about your husband and your fairweather freinds.

margaretclare

I know how you feel.

When I was widowed in 1992 lots of people said 'you know where we are if you need anything, only on the end of the phone...' but the people I valued most were the people who, as you say, did something practical that would help, who didn't wait for me to phone them.

Have you been in touch with the Macmillan organisation? They are immensely helpful.

pollypenny

Our good friend has just had the same diagnosis.

Thanks for the alert, we must make sure that we help.

cabbage

See if there is a carers group in your area so you can chat and meet up with other carers to see how they tackled this problem.

Can you get any help from social services when he's at home?

Some red cross offices offer respite care so that the carer can have the odd afternoon off to do as they please knowing that their loved ones are taken care of.

vivmagb

Thanks for all your kind replies and suggestions, I was feeling a bit wobbly and down when I posted this morning but am back on the up again.

missile

Keep strong, fingers crossed for you and OH.

PennyForThem_2

Have you tried MacMillians?

http://www.macmillan.org.uk/HowWeCanHelp/Nurses/AboutMacmillanNurses.aspx

Is your husband deemed 'curable' or is it 'pallative'? If pallative has he been referred to a pallative care consultant?

Was he diagnosed by the screening programme or symptomatic? The screening programme has specialist nurses which you can consult.

Symptomatic may also have specialist nurses which may be worth contacting