The not-so new cazzy

cazzyd

Ah I'm sure it will be ok, next weigh in is next Monday..if I can get by with a loss, however small I'll be happy.

First day done, it was a training day, it was really fun actually spent most of the morning laughing! Tomorrow will be the acid test, the children are back in . We got an early dart today so I'm making the most of my last few hours of being lazy. Part of this mornings training was making goals for this year...I told the trainer that I needed to be less self-critical..that when something goes wrong I am far too hard on myself. He said that i needed to give myself a goal, and my line manager told me I needed to make small targets...so small targets are realistic. One step at a time. And I also need to stop beating myself up if something doesn't get done! There are only so many hours in the day, and 6 of those are taken up by my giving sole attention to my children.

I am actually looking forward to getting back to it tomorrow, I've missed my little darlings!!!

Plan for rest of today-cook tea
-spend some time with bf
-read a chapter of my book before bed
-comp

Happy Monday everyboday

nowpanicking

Glad you had a good day today, always helps!

Smaller targets are definitely easier to deal with I think. Hope tomorrow goes well

cazzyd

nowpanicking, I just need to set them...and stick to them because I had a blip tonight, and it didn't help that I had a bit of an accident and hurt myself. So now I really feel like crying

Ah well need to sit down when I have time to make work and life small targets...ah but need to find the time. Still I feel a lot better than I did when I couldn't see a light at the end of the tunnel.

Job for tomorrow
-cancel the gym

cazzyd

Gym cancelled, but I'm still having a blip. I can't really set any short term goals until I get paid and know where I stand. I also then need to raise with HR my pay rise, if it hasn't occurred next pay day. I am still failing to see this light at the end of the tunnel, and when stuff goes wrong I get upset, and moving out seems further and further away than ever...and it doesn't help when I speak to friends in similar positions re: moving out and knowing that they've had help I could cry for hours...feeling helpless

On a more positive note, first day back with the kids was really good, if a tad cold....so I ripped off the plaster there..ha ha

3 more get ups and 9 till payday

nowpanicking

Hey, it's not long till you get paid so you just have to hang on until then. I reckon you'll feel more positive once you can set your wee goals

Plus well done on cancelling your gym membership :T

How's the healthy eating going? I'm managing to eat healthy meals but keep straying towards the sweets that are in the office. Everyone has decided to bring in their Christmas sweets to get rid of them, nightmare!!

cazzyd

It's not to bad actually, I'm staying away from all the chocolates and sweets in work....tempting as they are

Thanks for the encouragement, I feel a bit better now, I'm chilling with bf and that always makes me feel a million times better.

Nsd the last two days Monday would have been but I got stuff for work, and had I not done, I might not have fallen and hurt myself in the process. But hey ho, put my receipt in to get the money back, so can really class that as an nsd, as I will get the money back in the form of a Cheshire soon.

Got lots of work forms and paperwork to fill in over the next couple of days, plan is to stay late and go in early so I can relax this weekend.

I've got a season ticket for my favourite team which I share, it's my turn on Sunday. I'll normally buy a couple of beers, but I shall resist. I have 3 pounds in my purse and that is enough for the programme.

Hope everyone is good

cazzyd

Cheque not Cheshire...on my phone

cazzyd

Done the majority of tomorrow's paperwork today, so will do the forms tomorrow. I have an hour out of class, so I will go and lie in a darkened room and shut myself away from the world.

I've had an awful day, it started when chris evans played a song on the radio, it made me cry on the way to work. Then I cried in work, then I cried at dinnertime because I feel like I'm crap at my job Roll on Friday night, because all I want to do is chill...on the plus side I will have done everything I needed to do, to ensure a work free weekend, which is brilliant.

Unfortunately today hasn't been an NSD I had to pay for pet beauty treatment. Tomorrow I aim to spend £5 on a bottle or 2, of wine...ha ha xx

It's Friday tomorrow...YAYAYAYAYAY!

nowpanicking

Sorry you've had a bad day

First week back after hols is always the worst especially just after Christmas hols! I'm sure you're not crap at your job... just back to work blues.

Anyway... weekend is here soon - and you have your wine to look forward to!

cazzyd

Ha ha...dry january what??? I'm convinced it is back to work blues, mixed with anxiety. My first year of teaching has left me with scars that I never knew were there but I'm learning that they will heal, it will just take time. I've got an amazing and supportive team around me, especially my boss and line manager, I just need to believe in myself a little bit more.

Great to see you doing so well now panicking, this time next week it will have been payday, and hopefully we'll all be feeling a little better.