Some help please.....

bertie1989

So where to start.My partners father got me a job in the place he works and takes me most days as i cannot currently drive. He has a really bad alcohol problem that is getting worse and worse:(. Now he only normally drinks at home, but today had been drinking at work. I didn't notice until the drive home where honestly i was scared for my life. I tried to tell my partner about this and honestly the family just seems to brush it under the carpet. Now before anyone says, im not getting back in the car with him. I plan on just getting weekly bus tickets and taking the bus.But how do you tell someone that they have a problem and nearly killed you. I know he has tried to get help in the past but he just fails and starts drinking again. I do care for him but ive had to put my foot down and say to my partner that under no circumstances is he to be left alone with my child, Or be in a car with my child.Its tricky, hes not my dad but if he was i would slap him silly.Im just really stuck and dont know what to do!

daska

How did your partner respond?

bertie1989

She understood where i was coming from but she does not want to confront her father. Honestly they all just seem to brush it under the carpet as it has been going on for so long. If i get involved i really don't know if her family is going to turn against me.

SplanK

If nobody is interested in helping him then you need to do something.

He is not only putting his own life in danger, but everybody around him. Drink drivers are a ticking timebomb and could lead to somebody being killed.

I would suggest reporting him to the police when you see him drinking, letting the police know his likley movments so its easier for them to act and catch him in the act.

I would not hesitate to do this to anybody... and have done a couple of times in the past when all other help has failed.

SplanK

oh, and if you do it anon, there is no need for anybody to know that it was you who informed them

go_cat

Ring the police no doubt about it!

It could be you or a member of your family he kills.

I have zero sympathy for people who are drink drivers.

Oh and don't get a lift with him again I would rather walk

bertie1989

SplanK wrote: »

If nobody is interested in helping him then you need to do something.

He is not only putting his own life in danger, but everybody around him. Drink drivers are a ticking timebomb and could lead to somebody being killed.

I would suggest reporting him to the police when you see him drinking, letting the police know his likley movments so its easier for them to act and catch him in the act.

I would not hesitate to do this to anybody... and have done a couple of times in the past when all other help has failed.

I see your point and if this wasn't him i would do just that. But it really is complicated, If he gets caught drink driving and lost his license he would probably get worse(he has a history of depression). I want to help him, but one side of me says why should i? IF no-one else cares why should i? But on the other hand i know its going to end bad if that's either him or someone else.

daska

I know what I would do, I'd ring the police next time I believed he'd been drinking, I'd let them know his route and likely timing and hope they caught him sufficiently over the limit that his family had to accept that there was a problem. But I understand how difficult it is to do this when you know it is likely cause tension between you.

daska

bertie1989 wrote: »

I see your point and if this wasn't him i would do just that. But it really is complicated, If he gets caught drink driving and lost his license he would probably get worse(he has a history of depression). I want to help him, but one side of me says why should i? IF no-one else cares why should i? But on the other hand i know its going to end bad if that's either him or someone else.

Why should you? Easy! Because next time he has an 'accident' he might kill someone and that might be your child!

bertie1989

go_cat wrote: »

Oh and don't get a lift with him again I would rather walk

I don't intend to, Hence i have also banned him having my son in the car

bertie1989

SplanK wrote: »

oh, and if you do it anon, there is no need for anybody to know that it was you who informed them

Thanks you i will do it anon. Just thought it would be easy to pinpoint on me