Anyone with young ASD children?

Mommabear_3

My eldest son (7) has statement but I've been pushing to get him assessed properly for ASD as pretty much everyone thinks he is. My other son (4) no one is interested in listening to me about because he behaves in school but I think he's the same as his brother only with more aggressive tendencies, he shouts, screams, throws things, hits everyone, kicks, spits, basically goes mental on a daily basis. I feel all your pain

kezlou

my youngest is 8 years old and is currently being assessed for ASD.
He has his moments, luckily he's growing out of the violence spells, instead he shouts and screams and cries. I wouldn't change him for the world as he's my special little man.

I would get in touch with these people, they are fantastic
http://www.parentpartnership.org.uk/find-your-pps.aspx

they really helpful with liaising with schools and helping with statements. They lady who works for them in our area is amazing and has really helped us out.

Have you seen if they are local asd groups you can go to?
I recently started taking my 8 year old to one and it has really brought him socially. Its run by the local salvation army and siblings can go to.
The people who run it are parents with autistic children so they know what the kids are like. So none bats an eyelid if the kids start playing up. It really helped me to as its somewhere were i can relax and have a chat to.

Sorry not very helpful but just thought i'd post to add support and say you not alone.:):)

JKJ

Can I just say how amazing you all are. How incredibly amazing. I have no experience at all of the issues you live with daily, but I admire you all so much.

SingleSue

I have a 16 year old Aspergic child and a 14 complex autistic child.

The 16 year old has a horrendous temper and can be very very violent, thankfully, this has calmed down in recent years but he used to kick and punch me on a regular basis...so much so that my spine is permanently damaged and I now have sticks and a wheelchair (although this is not the whole reason, he contributed to it, it would have happened eventually but a particularly bad event 3 years ago made it come sooner)

But, it is not all a bad picture, aspergic son was perm excluded from his primary school age 7, spent time having private tutors and at a PRU and then returned to mainstream education for year 6. The same year he won student of the year..he is now in year 11, is top set for everything, is known as a gentle giant, polite and has been very settled. He is statemented which has helped but for us, the biggest thing was the discovery that music calmed him, especially playing the drums, it allowed him to get the aggression out, safely and without danger to others.

I am having a few problems this term however, because they have cut back on his time allowed doing music and are not adhering to his statement, plus general GCSE stress.....but I take each day as it comes.

Youngest has never been aggressive to others, only to himself and property, so he would throw himself at walls etc or throw items (usually his blooming inhaler, we go through so many of the blooming things!). He has spent time at a specialised school for autistic children but due to being hyper intelligent, he had to be placed back in mainstream education (where he can't cope!).

I don't think there has ever been a time when he has been truly settled in school, the closest we got was when he was at the specialist school and meltdowns are a frequent feature, at home and at school. Either that or shutting himself away from people (he doesn't like people, he would be perfectly happy to never see a human being) and reacting strongly when I or a teacher, try to get him to be 'in this world'.

He is also statemented but is also having the same problem as middle son, the statement not being adhered to and has consequently, lost pretty much all his support (their excuse is the shortage of TAs), so things have been pretty rough this term and it culminated with him having to be off school for a short time a few weeks back as he had reached his limit and was at break point (it's no fun watching your 14 year old son having a breakdown).

Educationally it is having an impact, he is exceptionally bright but because he is so unsettled, he is closing down and his levels are dropping alarmingly (he is doing the full programme of GCSEs). The school has once again become my second home and I am once again on first name terms with all the teachers!

To say I am a little worried about his future would be an understatement!

xxlouisexx56

SingleSue I really sympathise with you. My daughter is only just turning 7 and we live day to day, I can't even begin to imagine secondary school..

If your son has a statement that means the school get more money for him and if his statement says he should have one to one help then he should be getting it as the council are paying for it.

I've decided I need to be proactive and positive. A huge argument for me and holly is her hair. She gets food, glue and toothpaste in it and hates it being brushed.
I asked her to picture someone who's hair she liked and then we visited a family friend at her house and she gave holly a dry hair cut (she hates water and hair dryers) and now holly has a short bob and is really happy with it, and hopefully will stop a lot of screaming in the mornings

Nicki

Thanks for this thread! I have a 12 year old profoundly autistic DD who is getting quite handy with her fists and it is hard work. I find MSE not a very safe place to talk about autism as there are quite a few posters who like to expound how these kinds of behaviours are all down to poor parenting :mad: (needless to say not parents of ASD children themselves) and when I read these kinds of posts I imagine everyone in real life shares those views, which means I end up not only stressed by the fact that I am facing unpredictable and often quite painful assaults at home, but unable to draw on support from anyone when it happens and having to keep it quiet, like a true DV victim... So in the nicest possible way, it is a huge relief to read that I am not the only one going through this.

As for answers, at the moment I have none I am afraid. I did try to discuss it with my GP recently on the off chance this was a reaction to her epilepsy medications but was told it was probably just adolescence, with no other support offered. CAMHs support for the very seriously autistic in our area is non existent though they are happy to faff around with the more minor stuff only with verbal Asperger's kids.

tessie_bear

hi...my ds nearly 7 is asd and can be hard work...he is at a splendid special school who are wonderful with him...have u tried social services for help...they are largely completely useless but sometimes give acess to grants and groups that u might find useful

keep going xx

shegirl

Nicki wrote: »

Thanks for this thread! I have a 12 year old profoundly autistic DD who is getting quite handy with her fists and it is hard work. I find MSE not a very safe place to talk about autism as there are quite a few posters who like to expound how these kinds of behaviours are all down to poor parenting :mad: (needless to say not parents of ASD children themselves) and when I read these kinds of posts I imagine everyone in real life shares those views, which means I end up not only stressed by the fact that I am facing unpredictable and often quite painful assaults at home, but unable to draw on support from anyone when it happens and having to keep it quiet, like a true DV victim... So in the nicest possible way, it is a huge relief to read that I am not the only one going through this.

As for answers, at the moment I have none I am afraid. I did try to discuss it with my GP recently on the off chance this was a reaction to her epilepsy medications but was told it was probably just adolescence, with no other support offered. CAMHs support for the very seriously autistic in our area is non existent though they are happy to faff around with the more minor stuff only with verbal Asperger's kids.

I find that too.Both situations although we have a CAMHs psych visit us for work fortnightly and have a psychiatrist (they put him on antipsychotics to ease his anxiety).

There have been posters on here before who,when there was a huge problem with his last school,told me my son needed sectioning and gave a huge barrage of abuse.Along with those idiots who think it's parenting:rotfl:

As for services.We've been denied direct payments.My son is 2:1 in school and everywhere else but we've just lost his place respite centre (no idea how long for -it's been 5 weeks now and will be months at least), that gave me an essential break every Friday night,that we've had for 4 years now,he's only in school half days on a 2:1 basis in his own,personal, classroom (well normally is,his been off all week due to one assistant being ill),I've had to have essential work done on the house for him involving builders being in,am shattered beyond belief but the disability team claim they can't think of anything they can offer us now:eek:

Meanwhile,I know of people (including a friend) with very mild kids (ds is described as being in the 10 most severely/profoundly affected in our catchment area spanning 2 counties) and aspies who are getting everything thrown at them,even when they have their own support and are out god knows how many evenings/nights a month enjoying themselves while friends babysit,husbands take over,they take the kids with them.

Nevermind.I'll just sit in pure iscolation with no help at all,be beaten black and blue and still remain perfectly sane! It won't affect ds development at all..idiots:mad:

shegirl

tessie_bear wrote: »

hi...my ds nearly 7 is asd and can be hard work...he is at a splendid special school who are wonderful with him...have u tried social services for help...they are largely completely useless but sometimes give acess to grants and groups that u might find useful

keep going xx

I used to find them helpful. Now they are quite the bloody opposite.

tessie_bear

shegirl wrote: »

I used to find them helpful. Now they are quite the bloody opposite.

in all my dealings with social services i have found them useless...doesnt stop me trying though im glad they have been some use to u....care to share the positives as i hit a brick wall with the useless mares everytime i get in touch