Really really missing my pooch now.

Jojo_the_Tightfisted

It DOES get better.

I promise.



In the meantime, anything you can do to get outside in daylight will help, make sure if you're at home during daylight hours that you open the curtains/blinds wide open to get the light flooding in, anything that can increase the amount of daytime you see will help - are you spending the few daylight hours we've got in with the relative and coming out in the dark as well?


Mutt kept you busy, whether it was trying to eat small children or the furniture, or whether it was snoring and farting all evening. So you don't have all that distraction, either. Anything non animal related that gets you out will help until you know you're ready to do it all again.


After all, there are only so many times you can go into the library to tell them your dog ate the books before they think you've got some strange fetish for buying secondhand ones....so give it some time - they might not recognise you by then.

paddypaws101

Oh, I do feel your pain.
Is there really no way you can have another dog right now? Surely even if you are working longish hours there is an older dog in rescue who could deal with that, and would be there to snuggle up to in the long evenings.

Person_one

So sorry you're struggling.

Have you had a look at the Blue Cross bereavement support? There's a helpline, e-mail support and some stuff to download. It might help to have an outlet when you're on your own and there's nobody else immediately available.

http://www.bluecross.org.uk/2083/pet-bereavement-support-service.html

elsien

paddypaws101 wrote: »

Oh, I do feel your pain.
Is there really no way you can have another dog right now? Surely even if you are working longish hours there is an older dog in rescue who could deal with that, and would be there to snuggle up to in the long evenings.

Working long hours, out at 8am. Coming home, having a quick cuppa, straight out to nursing home for a couple of hours, home for 7.30 ish, cook tea, try to catch up on housework, go to bed. Rinse and repeat. Just not fair on any dog, unfortunately, when that's the routine four days a week. Can't be done, much as I'd like to, really wouldn't be right. In that respect, mutt's probably best off out of it, awful as that sounds, as she'd be feeling a tad neglected herself by now.
I'm being a bit selfish by trying to keep some of my days off to myself without the relly visiting, just to keep my sanity, but it's not the same going walking on your own. And with shift work, walking friends are often working themselves when I'm free. With a dog you have to get up and go out, without one there's very little incentive especially with our current lovely weather.
Anyway, enought whinging, I just need to get a grip and get on with it.
Roll on spring!

Helen2k8

Aww.

I have nothing much more to offer, except that it's okay to cry and shout and say "life SUCKS" whenever it does.

(Speaking as one who feels stupid for getting sad/ill/etc).

Depending where you walk, if you need a kind of "purpose" to be out, perhaps looking out for birds, or trees, or UFOs...

rising_from_the_ashes

Dollardog wrote: »

Yes elsien, some dogs are more 'special' even though we love the others that go before or after. I can't say the pain ever goes because it doesn't, I don't think it gets that easier either, although another dog is a distraction..

100% agree with Dollar on this one (unfortunately)......

hethmar

Yes, know the feeling and of course everything else going on in your life will make the pain worse.

Cant you do a bit of volunteer dog socialising with a rescue even if its only the weekend? You will have something to focus on and you will meet like minded people to chat with.

xx

murphydog999

Big sympathies, I too feel your pain. I don't know whether this helps, but when my dear Murph went we already had a six month old kitten (we've always had cats and dogs at the same time), and it was nice to have something soft, furry and loveable in the house that needed taking care of - nice because (and don't misunderstand me, on this) it wasn't a dog, there were no reminders.

I don't know whether you are a cat person, but apart from being a focus, they do give you a reason to enjoy your home again without them being a 'replacement.'

We still haven't got a dog after 5 years - through not being practical reasons really - and although the time is now right, I keep putting it off. I think it scares me. I'm scared I either won't have the same relationship with another dog that I had with Murph - and be somehow let down - or I will have the same relationship, and eventually have to go through this immense hurt again.

It's torture; but I still have my sweet little cat - currently purring on my lap - to take care of, and that's a big help/comfort.

Hope you find an answer x

bugslet

Hi elsien

Some dogs just are more special - 6 at the moment and I know there are some that I will mourn more than the others, though they are all loved.

But yes you are right, it's too hard having a dog at the moment. i leave the house at 5.45, come home, and vist my OH in hospital ( nursing home shortly) and it's flipping tiring. I too look forward to the weekend when at least I can slob out with a box set ( not descended to Real Housewives of New York yet:eek:). Fortunately mine come to work with me, so it helps a bit, but they aren't getting as many walks as before.

as kylyr suggests, how about a houserabbit? Or a guinea pig, they are darned cute and provided they are handled well from the start, they can be really sweet.

aliasojo

I really wish there was something I could do to make you feel better. I don't have any great words of wisdom I'm afraid, just wanted to post to say I was thinking about you.

Mutt was such a big character that it's not surprising you're feeling her absence more now that the nights are closing in and the sun's not there to help make us feel a bit brighter.

It will get better, you just need to keep plodding. x