What age to leave a child alone for 1/2 hour at night?

ymcas

I don't have children but a friend has just come up against this. Younger child was very very tired, but eldest needed picking up from activity. Younger child would normally have gone with my friend to pick up eldest but this time she left him at home to go to bed (at his request). Just wondered what peoples opinions were about what is the "right" age to consider leaving a child. I appreciate it depends a lot on the maturity of the child but would appreciate other peoples experiences/thoughts.

chergar

I would say no younger than 14. Anything can happen in half hour - house goes on fire, sudden illness etc. Also you have to consider that although you are only planning on being away half an hour any delay can happen - car crash, serious fall etc.

a1969baby

Like you say, I think it depends on the maturity of the child, whether they can be trusted not to do anything daft etc.

When my daughter was a bit younger, around 9 or 10, I left her occasionally to pick up older son from babysitting or a friends house for 20 mins and she was fine.

She is 12 now and I have to sometimes leave her on her own for a couple of hours in the evening while I am at work, if my son isn't around.

She doesn't mind at all and is happy to be in charge of the remote control or sits and does her homework. I only work a 5 minute walk away so would be able to get back in an emergency (and she isn't allowed to answer the housephone or door, have a bath, or do any cooking while I'm out!)

thriftlady_2

We started leaving our eldest alone in the house for periods of up to 1 hour in September when he started secondary school -he was 11. These occasions have always been in the day though -not sure I would do it at night. I only do it for the same reasons as your friend ie fetching and delivering other children.

When we started ds didn't have a phone so we made an arrangement that if I needed to ring him I would let the phone ring out once and then ring again so he would know it was me ringing. I didn't want him answering to some stranger and saying he was alone in the house. He was also under strict instructions not to answer the door (unless it was family).

HTH

snails's_pace

I think i'll wait till my eldest,ds,is 13/14 before i leave him on his own whilst i nip out to the shops. He'd have the whole neighbourhood in ,in the short space of time itd take me to get a pint of milk.....the swwwwwwwwwwwiiiiiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnnnnneeeeeeeeee

aurora_borealis_2

I used to live across the road from the school when I had young children.

I always took mine with me to collect the elder one (s), asleep or not.

My neighbour twice to my knowledge left her baby sleeping in the cot when she went to pick up. It was only across the road but it used to take 20 mins :eek: :eek:

I would leave an older child for 1/2 hour at aged 11ish. By that age they are walking to school alone anyway.

funky-footprints

my nephew has been left in the house to get himself up for secondary school since he started comp, before that he was taken to my parents to catch the bus to primary school, and he came home from primary school to my parents.
he now goes home to an empty house, gets his own tea, until his mother gets home after 6pm I think it is disgusting, there are options there, my parents worry senseless. he is an August child so young for his year, has done this since aged 11.

Spendless

I think a lot of people make the 1st steps of leaving them when they get to secondary school age. Often there is not the childcare options of Primary school age children, and many make their own way to and from school.

My 7yo asked me recently how I would wait for him in the secondary school playground cos his sister would still be at junior school. When i pointed out to him by then, he would be wtravelling to and from school himself, he replied but X isn't allowed to and they are 16. Showed me how much he'd picked up on what this person is and isn't allowed to do (though they are allowed to walk to and from school alone;) ).

What time of night are we talking about BTW?

jamgirl

my daughter is 11, 12 next month and i would leave her alone for 1/2hr if i was picking up another child. i have only ever done this in the daytime though so not sure how i would feel about doing it late on.

i started doing this when she started secondary school. she is occasionally home before me, usually for 5-10 mins at the most, so we gave her a key with the restrictions of not answering the door or phone. she puts her mobile on incase i need to contact her. she is happy to get changed out of her uniform and just wait for us to come in!

ymcas

Spendless wrote: »

I think a lot of people make the 1st steps of leaving them when they get to secondary school age. Often there is not the childcare options of Primary school age children, and many make their own way to and from school.

My 7yo asked me recently how I would wait for him in the secondary school playground cos his sister would still be at junior school. When i pointed out to him by then, he would be wtravelling to and from school himself, he replied but X isn't allowed to and they are 16. Showed me how much he'd picked up on what this person is and isn't allowed to do (though they are allowed to walk to and from school alone;) ).

What time of night are we talking about BTW?

it was 9pm... what do you think?

liney

11 for a short time during the day, 13 for short periods in the evening, and 15 for an evening out. This was my ruleing as a child, and i was fine. It would depend on the child though as you say.