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Forced out of joint tenancy property, domestic abuse

Hello,

I'm looking for some advice/guidance in respect of a joint tenancy agreement between my ex-partner and I.

I will provide some background first. My (ex)partner, a 23 year old female, and I, a 22 year old male, moved into a rented property together in June 2012 for which we have a joint tenancy agreement for 12 months, expiring in June 2013. We both put money towards the deposit, although I paid approximately £100 more due to the financial situation at the time. While we were living together, we split the costs of all rent and bills through a joint account (which we still use at present).

My ex-partner has always had a bit of a drinking problem - I say a bit, an issue only mainfests when she drinks around me whereby as time goes on, she becomes more and more vile and hurtful in her comments to me, but is fine when drinking with friends. Due to this, approximately 6 months ago we made a mutual agreement that we would not drink around each other as it always ended badly.

Now, approximately 2 months ago we took a 1 week holiday to Egypt together for which I paid the money up front using savings and my partner agreed to reimburse me over the coming months. Whilst away on holiday, she proceeded to get severely drunk (on the second night that we were there) to the extent that the hotel reception called the room and requested my presence out by the restraurant, where I found she had stripped off completely naked, had fallen over multiple times and hurt herself and she had to be taken back to the room in a wheelchair. I put my partner to bed, but not before she assaulted by slapping me around the face twice, cutting my face with quite a large gash, and then proceeding to urinate in my shoes (yeah...). At this point I attempted to end the relationship, although my partner then proceeded to attempt to kill herself the next day via a drugs overdose and cutting herself after smashing a hotel glass. I intervened, stopped her from doing it and we 'enjoyed' the remainder of the holiday.

Fast forward by about 2 weeks from our return. My partner had 2 days off sick from work on a Wednesday and a Thursday (approxiately 5/6 weeks ago from today). Upon my leaving work on Thursday, I stopped by my partner's grandmother's house (as we normally visit on a Thursday) and then continued on my way home. On my way back to the house, my partner called me approximately 5 times (the trip takes about 1 hour total) and was blind drunk completely unable to string a sentence together. When I got home, the house was in total darkness and when I found my partner, she was sat in front of my computer, had carved her arm open with a kitchen knife and had bled and spilt wine all over the carpets. I attempted to calm her down and got her into the bedroom as she was still attempting to hurt herself (was bashing her head off of the radiator, walls etc) and tried to calm her down sufficient enough to check her wrist. My partner then attacked me, punching, kicking, biting and slaping me while I attempted to phone an ambulance. Whilst on the phone to 999, they could hear the commotion and also sent a police unit to attend. When the police arrived, they had to physically restrain her, using significant force as well as handcuffs as my partner attempted to fight them off and was hurling all sorts of abuse. Eventually, they calmed her down and she was taken to the hospital willingly. I later found out that while at the hospital, she also punched a police officer. Fortunately, they did not pres any charges / arrest her and I advised them I wished to take the abuse matter no further.

We had split up following this as a fairly mutual agreement, although since this occuring my partner was continually making snide comments and insults in an attempt to get a rise out of me, even in front of her grand parents. I did not make an issue with any of this, nor even mention it to her as I did not wish it to escalate further.

Over the course of the following week, my now ex-partner was also continually attempting to start arguments, including one that involved her kicking the front of my computer with some significant force (my computer is essentially my only hobby, with the box itself being worth around £2k) which left dents to the front and damaged components inside.

Several days after this on a Friday (now approximately 4 weeks ago), my partner followed me up to bed (as we were sleeping in separate rooms) at around 12:00pm, 10 minutes after I had gone to bed. She knew that I had to be up at around 6.30AM so that I could take my car in for a service / MOT. My partner proceeded to start an argument and continue it up, refusing to leave me alone at any point for the next 5 hours. I went to different rooms, she'd follow me, I asked her to leave me alone to get some rest and/or calm down (eventually devolved into shouting myself hoarse) but she refusing, stating it was her house too and I couldnt tell her what to do. By around 4:30 AM, when she hadn't got the rise out of me she was hoping for, she decided to grab my iPhone and throw it off the floor, then pick it up and throw it off of the window. I regret to say I sank to her level and threw her phone down the stairs, after which she picked mine up and made numerous attempts to smash it off of the wall, the table, the floor, anything she could reach. I restrained her and removed my phone from her posession (I did not hit, only restrained her arms). After this, she then attacked me again, kicking, elbowing, punching etc. To defend myself, I winded her and called the police. As soon as I called the police, my partner had an instant personality change, called her parents and told them that I had assaulted her and beat her up, which she was also telling the police once they arrived. This was around 5:00AM on Saturday.

Following the police attending, I went back to my parents (who fortunately live only 15 minutes away, and have also been very supportive in all of this). I attended the propery again on Saturday with my mother for a witness and collected the vast majority of my possessions and moved home. Some of my items still remain at the house, such as my bed, washing machine, fridge, sofa etc.

Now, on to the crux of my question.

My partner has been at the premises 'alone' now for approximately 1 month. I told her at the start of this 1 month period that she needs to contact the landlord/agency and inform them that we wish to terminate the tenancy agreement which she said she would do. I left this to my partner as she would need to find a new place to live as living with friends/family is not an option given how far away they are. As I said, it is now 1 month later and there has been no movement on this front, although my partner claims to have spoken to the agency twice and had the landlord visit the premises last weekend - as of yet I have been unable to verify this but I am making attempts to contact the landlord/agency.

During the course of general conversation with my (ex)partner, I have found out that she has been having multiple friends around the house, holding parties and intends to hold several more in the future. I do not believe this is being said to annoy me, as I have been to the premises within the last 3 weeks to get some more of my items, and found multiple empty bottles of Vodka, Wine, Cider etc. Furthermore, I believe she now has somebody else living there (another guy, an ex-boyfriend who she claims is only a friend), although I have not approached her about this. This individual is not paying any rent (which I still have to cover half of due to my name being on the joint tenancy agreement) and to add insult to injury, is sleeping in my very bed.

I do intend to return to the property during the next week and remove the remainder of my items which would make it difficult for my ex-partner to remain there.

I suppose a quick summary of my questions would be best:
  • My ex-partner is dragging her feet in attempting to terminate our 12 month tenancy agreement early; seeing as I am not residing in the property any more and wish to terminate as I have been the victim of several bouts of domestic abuse, what rights do I have to terminate the agreement early without needing my partner to consent to it? (I do not believe she would consent to it as she is living in a new 4 bedroom house for which half of her rent is paid for her every month and she gets to hold multiple parties whenever she feels like it)
  • I believe there is another individual now residing in the property that is in a joint name between myself and my partner, an individual who is paying no rent and has no 'permission' from me to be there (would he even need this?). Am I within my rights to force him out of the property, or to force him to pay rent as he is residing there and not me?
  • What about any damage caused to the property durnig these 'parties' that my ex-partner is hosting and I am unable to prevent? When I left the property, it was in a good condition as I had recently repainted walls, filled in holes in the plaster etc (which the landlord did not do before we moved in). How will this impact on my deposit given that I have not been residing there during any of this?
In addition, I know the individual who is now co-habiting with my partner also has a 'significant' drug habit - essentially always smoking weed, which I do not want happening at a property I am both named on and liable for.



I apologise for the length of this post, but I felt some backstory was necessary to explain the full extent of my situation. If you need any further information, I will be happy to oblige.
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Comments

  • zzzLazyDaisy
    zzzLazyDaisy Posts: 12,497 Forumite
    Part of the Furniture Combo Breaker
    edited 1 November 2012 at 1:24PM
    Is there a break clause in the tenancy agreement?

    If not, you have no right to end the tenancy early. Your domestic situation does not affect the contract you have with your landlord.

    You can get advice from Shelter (they help with all housing problems, not just homelessness)

    http://england.shelter.org.uk/

    Edit - just to say that of the contract contains the right to end the tenancy before the end of the 6 month period, you can end the tenancy yourself, without her cooperation. She will then need to make her own arrangements for alternative accommodation.
    I'm a retired employment solicitor. Hopefully some of my comments might be useful, but they are only my opinion and not intended as legal advice.
  • jazabelle
    jazabelle Posts: 1,707 Forumite
    Right first of all, I think you need to write directly to the landlord if you can and explain the whole situation. Don't leave this to your partner, don't write to the letting agents (although you could copy them in.) This should be to the address for giving notices to, on your tenancy agreement.

    You don't need to give every detail, but you could say you moved in with your partner, her drinking escalated to the point of physical abuse towards you on multiple occasions. You had to leave on x date for your own safety. and cannot return.

    The problem is legally if you're on a fixed tenancy for a year (or whatever) you are liable until it ends. So it's going to be down to the goodwill of your landlord.

    However, I think it would help other people if you gave more information about your tenancy.

    - Which country do you live (laws are different for Scotland and NI)?
    - What type of tenany are you on? Shorthold I assume by the June 2013.
    - Have you checked to see if has a break clause? This would be at six months, however, so you've probably missed it.

    It may be worth also contacting Shelter and a domestic violence charity to see if they can help more, again with trying to negotiate a way out for you.
    "There is no medicine like hope, no incentive so great, and no tonic so powerful as expectation of something better tomorrow." - Orison Swett Marden
  • Fire_Fox
    Fire_Fox Posts: 26,026 Forumite
    Part of the Furniture 10,000 Posts Name Dropper Combo Breaker
    edited 1 November 2012 at 1:45PM
    Whilst I have sympathy for you most of this is irrelevant. Do not attempt to suck the landlord into your private domestic affairs, stick to the rights and responsibilities you, your partner and the landlord have under the assured shorthold tenancy agreement you all signed. I would suggest the most you say is that the relationship has irretrievably broken down, that you are concerned for your own safety and the safety of the property. I do not think you should specify the nature of your partner's medical problems as people with mental health problems have a legal right to privacy/ confidentiality.

    You are currently in a legally binding contract, if you wish this to be terminated it is YOUR responsibility to contact the landlord and ASK if they will accept a surrender. The landlord does not have to accept this tho he may choose to do so if the rent is not paid, the neighbours complain about the noise, illegal substances are being used or he is concerned the property is being damaged. You may wish to quote all the clauses in the AST that you believe are being breached.

    I would also suggest you read the utility meters and attempt to get your name taken off ALL the bills by paying and closing the accounts. Your partner then can/ should open accounts in her name which she will be responsible for paying.

    You cannot and should not try to force your partner's guests out of the property, you are likely to get yourself arrested again. Unless the guest is keeping all their possessions at the property and having mail delivered there they may not be deemed to be a resident anyway, merely an overnight guest.

    Just as you are jointly and severally liable for the full rent you are jointly and severally liable for any damage. Unfortunately you could lose a lot more than your deposit, you could be taken to court for any shortfall. The landlord would need to prove the condition of the property before you took occupation with a detailed inventory probably including photographs.

    If the landlord is uncooperative (and ONLY then) you may decide to stop paying the rent to force his hand. You MUST set the money aside and pay it as soon as the landlord has agreed in writing to accept surrender or evicted your partner. Note that you will still be liable for her half of the rent if she does not pay either, and the landlord may be quite happy to chase you if you have previously been in arrears. You would need to be two months in arrears for the landlord to serve a section 8 notice to quit and still two months in arrears on the date of the court hearing. This means that if you partner pays the rent the eviction will not go ahead.
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  • Gordon_Hose
    Gordon_Hose Posts: 6,259 Forumite
    Debt-free and Proud!
    Get your stuff and walk away. She sounds like a fruit loop.
  • mcdonger
    mcdonger Posts: 12 Forumite
    Thank you for your replies, and yes dont worry, I'm long gone! Just need to get the messy situation with the tenancy sorted out.

    I'm at work at the moment so unfortunately cannot have a look at the tenancy agreement but I'll update as soon as I can - I recall it mentioning something about it being possible to break so long as we pay any relisted fees with re-advertising the property. So I would be able to contact the landlord / agency and request to break the agreement without my partners consent and, if they agree, she would have to be out in X amount of time?

    With the 'guest at the premises', I didn't mean force him out with actual physical force, more just if I was within my rights to request him to leave the property, with possible threat of legal/police involvement, but I understand that he'd probably be considered as a mere overnight guest so I wouldn't be able to do anything about it. It just adds insult to injury to think of some other guy sleeping in 'my' house, in my bed and at my expense and theres nothing I can do about it (in the immediate term anyway) :(

    Thank you for the idea of writing to the landlord stating all of the clauses that I feel might be broken by my partner - I should imagine that would prompt him to take some action in respect of ending it early, hopefully at any rate!
  • mcdonger
    mcdonger Posts: 12 Forumite
    Just managed to speak to the letting agents / landlord and they had no idea that we wished to terminate the lease and hadn't heard from my ex-partner!
  • missrlr
    missrlr Posts: 2,192 Forumite
    speaking is not going to be accepted as a formal notice, get in writing that you want to terminate at earliest possible point, ASAP. Get on with the advice re above and get your names off any bills ASAP.
    Video the state of the premises NOW so you can prove any subsequent damages although you are still liable until the contract is terminated but you can then take ex to court for her share. There is no point being nice and talking, actions speak louder than words so DO something positive about this before it gets even worse.
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  • RAS
    RAS Posts: 35,078 Forumite
    Part of the Furniture 10,000 Posts Name Dropper
    edited 1 November 2012 at 5:21PM
    Write to the address given in you contract for serving notice. Two copies first class with certificates of posting.

    Have you informed the local Coucil that you have left the house and when?
    If you've have not made a mistake, you've made nothing
  • mcdonger
    mcdonger Posts: 12 Forumite
    edited 2 November 2012 at 1:40PM
    Bit of an update to this - the tenancy agreement does indeed provide a provision for exiting the tenancy early and I will be handing in written notice to the agency and the landlord in person tomorrow, this will include the various clauses of the tenancy that I feel my ex-partner may break as advised in an above post.

    A little further advice would be brilliant if possible. Things between me and my ex-partner have soured to a point beyond civility now, primarily arguing over money owed with my ex-partner having no qualms about resorting to hurling insults and abuse in my direction via emails (I have not sunk to this level). During the course of the 'conversation' my partner has been attempting to make me pay money into the joint account we hold (a small sum, £20-£30) in order to cover it being taken overdrawn and incurring fees through a direct debit. After thoroughly combing the account to establish why (as we have always transferred our money in in a timely fashion), I identified it was due to my ex-partner using some of the money for personal expenses (approximately £129 in total), including when she withdrew £30 from the account to fund a taxi as she stormed out of the house following an argument and blames me for it. She is now refusing to repay any of this money into the account, and will not cover any charges incurred as a result. I intend to get myself removed from this account as soon as possible, although cannot ni the immediate future as it is being used to pay the tenancy for the joint property. I know I am jointly liable for the account, but do I have any means to be able to force my partner into covering the debt she has incurred through her own actions?

    In addition, during the course of what I described in my initial post, my partner also caused approximately £150 worth of damage to my computer and £30 worth of damage to my phone through fits of rage where she lashed out, and in an attempt to get a rise out of me. She also owes me approximately £620 from the holiday we went on during September, but is now refusing to pay me the full amount of this (stating she will only pay £500 towards the cost of the holiday as she will not pay towards any of the foreign currency we purchased) and has also stated she will be taking what she believes I owe to the joint account off of this lower sum, leaving with a total of approximately £450 that she will repay me. As a note, we brought back over half of the foreign currency from the holiday and were intending to change it back to deposit into my account. However, when I left the property, the foreign currency was left at the premises and when I returned to gather my things, I was unable to find it at anywhere. My partner claims that she has not seen it and believes I have it and will therefore refuse to pay any towards it. I certainly do not have posession of this money. I believe that either she has taken it for her own gain, or it has been taken by one of her 'guests'.

    From the damage that she has caused my property along with the cost of the holiday and foreign currency, I believe my partner should be repaying me around £800 (I have full receipts/evidence for the holiday & foreign currency, and I am able to prove the worth of my property that she caused damage to), but as I said she will only repay me £450. Is this something I would be able to take to court/small claims court with a realistic chance of winning?

    My partner has also stated that she believes any end to the tenancy on the property requires both of our signatures and she will not be providing hers under any circumstances. I know that it does not need both of us to agree to this so it is not an issue, but would this help my case in any way, given that she has essentially stated she is trying to screw me over?
  • Gordon_Hose
    Gordon_Hose Posts: 6,259 Forumite
    Debt-free and Proud!
    You may as well write off any money owed to you. In small claims court you'd have to prove any money wasn't a gift. As for the damage, it's criminal damage so you'd have to call the Police and report it, it's not something small claims deals with as it is criminal.

    Concentrate your efforts in getting your name off the tenancy and the joint account for now.
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