Dilemma!

londoner01

My partner and I have booked a long weekend away elsewhere in Europe this week, for his birthday. In typical moneysaving style we went for all the discounts and cheap options and so it's all non-amendable and non-refundable.
OH's passport is now AWOL, so he can't leave. We're still looking for it but we have started to think what should happen in case it doesn't turn up. He wants me to go by myself so that the money "isn't wasted". To be honest, if this had happened at another time of the year, I would have done this. But leaving him alone on his birthday seems so cruel!
Of course if I went I would be thinking of him a lot, in fact I think I would probably keep a diary for him and Skype him every day, but it still sucks!

So I'm trying to decide, what sucks more? Should I forget about the holiday (we can always go next time) but then think £400 have completely gone down the drain and so I have no present for him? (I've given him an early present too, but that would mean nothing on the day). Or should I go anyway and still make the holiday about us being together, while apart?

He is the one that came up with the idea of me going (although I'd thought about it separately too). He said he would feel guilty or like "the mistake is twice as big" if neither of us went - but I bet he would forget! And he wouldn't feel let down. On the other hand, when he presented the idea, he said he didn't expect I would want to go! (Before I said anything either way).

I think for both of us it just feels really big to waste the money, so we'd rather both of us sacrifice something (him giving up on the holiday, me giving up going on experiencing a new place with him) than just miss the opportunity.

I'm going back to look for the passport, but it doesn't look very hopeful, so what do you think we should do?


PS: I will eventually delete this thread because I think it makes us a bit too recognisable. That doesn't mean I don't appreciate what you'll have written!

mountainofdebt

emergency passport?

thehappybutterfly

I'm no jetsetter but is there any other form of photographic ID he can use? I'm just thinking if it's an EU country, does it have to be a passport?

moodydonkey

Can't you talk to the passport office and make an appointment to get things sorted?

londoner01

Oh, I should have said.

Emergency travel documents seem to only be available from abroad into the UK, and yes as a UK national he has to travel on a passport. We're going to try to go at the get tomorrow with a driver's licence and possibly his birth certificate (apparently driver's licence isn't proof of nationality) but the last time this seems to have worked is in 2008-2009, checks seem to have toughened since then.

No time to make an appointment at ID and Passport Services because they don't replace lost passports in less than 7 days.

So let's change the scenario a bit, if we try all the options (police report, etc), and at the gate they still refuse him boarding, what do I do?

Person_one

Would travel insurance cover a cancellation? Or is it not covered if its your 'fault' as it were?

Is there not a passport office you can drive to? You can get a new passport in a few hours at the Liverpool office.


Edit: Just seen your recent post. Is it definitely definitely missing? When was the last time it was used? I would spend a day turning your house upside down from top to bottom, I bet its there somewhere!

JodyBPM

Do you want to go on your own? Personally I wouldn't and would enjoy a night at home with DH and a bottle of wine celebrating his birthday more than I would enjoy a city break by myself, but I'm not massively into travelling to be honest, and certainly not by myself, whereas I know some people really are.

I would suspect that since your DH has suggested it, that he will be OK with it if you do decide to go on your own. Perhaps you could ring around a few of your friends and see if they'd turn up at your place with a bottle of wine and have a bit of an impromptu surprise party on his actual birthday whilst you are away? That way you won't need to be worried about him being on his own on the day.

jen007

No way of a friend coming with you? A last minute change of flight details?

I wouldn't like to do a break on my own. I'm not a good traveller though.

*max*

Have you definitely checked with the airline what the ID requirements are? Are you flying tomorrow? What country?

Edit: I would turn the house upside down. Check all suitcases, bags, document folders. Check under the couch, under the bed, under all furniture. Check in jackets you may have put away for winter/summer in the loft or cupboard. Check the TV unit, in between dvd cases, in between books on the bookcase.

Last year I lost my ID card (French, we have those) and finally found it 2 days later in a photo album!

And no, to answer your question, I wouldn't go, it's his birthday. It's just "one of those things". Hope you do find it!

zaksmum

If you shoved the passport in a drawer last time you used it, check it hasn't fallen down the back of the drawer into the one below, or even under the cabinet the drawer is in.

What were you wearing when you last used it? What bags/suitcases did you take? Have you needed it for ID purposes, for example opening/closing bank account? Have you put it "somewhere safe"? On top of a cupboard? Under the mattress?

Hope you find it.

Lunar_Eclipse

I wouldn't go.

The money paid is a sunk cost, so I would simply be thinking about your partner's/spouse's birthday. I know I would regret going by myself, purely because it was planned as a (special) joint trip, not because I don't love travel or solo adventure.

Putting it another way: I'd be far more likely to regret going than not going.