Anyone Else Dreading Christmas?

tesuhoha

I'm not dreading it because I'm lonely but because the house, for the 6th Christmas in succession, is still a building site and this year will be the first time I have eaten my Christmas dinner on my lap.

Sounds a bit childish after all these sad posts but I am not looking forward to it nonetheless.

victor2

I'm not dreading it, it will be what I/we make it and we'll have had worse.
What bugs me is that we're talking about how miserable it can be 2 MONTHS before it happens. The next millennium will probably be pretty dull, but I'm not that bothered as nobody I know will be around to see it.

shaz77_2

Christmas day will be with my parents but to be honest our relationship with them is not great as they contributed towards the breakup of my ex.

I just don't get it, I want to be in a relationship and I'm in the position to be able to offer someone a great life but with the exception of my ex there has never been anyone else. The people I meet I'm usually uninterested in them as they genuinely have no ambition aside from wanting to get drunk or jump into bed with you. Is it too much to ask to find a person who want to work and has a bit of class and intelligence or am I being too picky?

I keep getting told I'm a great catch but I've never believed this, I just find it frustrating that for some of us love was not meant to happen.

VestanPance

Shaz I'm in a similar position regarding Christmas. I used to love that time of year, but these days I dread it and can't wait for it to pass.

The things that do it for me was splitting from my ex. The loss of a long term partner and her family who I was very close with. Added to that both my parents have now passed away means it is a time when the thought of it really is just me, myself & I tends to hit home.

Last year I got so bored I decided to go out on the bike and ended up cycling nearly 100 miles. On the plus side I slept well that night.

Tiddlywinks

shaz77 wrote: »

Christmas day will be with my parents but to be honest our relationship with them is not great as they contributed towards the breakup of my ex.

I just don't get it, I want to be in a relationship and I'm in the position to be able to offer someone a great life but with the exception of my ex there has never been anyone else. The people I meet I'm usually uninterested in them as they genuinely have no ambition aside from wanting to get drunk or jump into bed with you. Is it too much to ask to find a person who want to work and has a bit of class and intelligence or am I being too picky?

I keep getting told I'm a great catch but I've never believed this, I just find it frustrating that for some of us love was not meant to happen.

If your relationship is not that great with your parents at the moment, how do you think it could get better? Do you HAVE to go there over christmas if it is going to make you that unhappy?

Changing the subject to you getting out and meeting someone... if you always go to the same sort of places then you will always meet the same sort of people.

Try something a little different - do an evening class, join a walking, book, photography (as examples) club - just change your habits and you will move in different circles. Give it a go...

OrkneyStar

I think a lot of people don't 'enjoy' Christmas, as much as you'd think.
When I was single I could take it or leave it tbh, tried to spend some time with sister/hubby and her kids, but she often made it clear that she just wanted her and her immediate family on the day really. Dad passed away when I was 17, so mum and I ended up together most years, some times I cooked, sometimes we both did, we bought each other lovely gifts, relaxed, ate, but I somehow felt that it was all a bit pointless in a way. Now I have a DS and am married I do enjoy it a bit more, bit still struggle to get in with the commercial side of it all. Decide what YOU want to do, and what is realistic for you.....then do your best to 'treat' yourself like a queen for a day or two. Hope you get through it, and wishing you some hope that you won't always feel this way about it all x

VestanPance

I was never big on the commercial side of Christmas.

Reading many other stories on this forum has highlighted that I was lucky back then regarding family. I got on perfectly well with my family, no dramas what so ever. I also got on brilliantly with my ex in-laws. Christmas to me then was about spending time with people I loved and enjoyed being around, and the food which I'll admit to being a greedy big sod about. Even both sides of our families got on very well, so Christmas was normally at least 10 people (often far more) all round having a great day together.

Now I spend it alone. The meal is wasted on me, as Christmas dinner for one is rather depressing for me (yes I did try it to try and rekindle my love for that time of year). Plus the added fact that it is now hard to think of people that who are no longer in my life either through their passing away, or because of the split with me and my ex.

Add to that that everything (film, tv, songs) about that time of year is about family and love etc it's a kick in the knackers when that's exactly the sort of thing you're trying not to think about.

isitenough

I've never been a great fan of Christmas. It always turns into a pain of who spends it with who, how much people spend and what to get them. We also don't have a lot of money (just debts we're trying to clear, privately) and no matter how many times we politely ask that other relations just buy for our 2 kids, it doesn't work!

My Mum died in January, so this will be the first one without her (got to get through her bday at the end of Nov first though..) it's not one I'm looking forward too. We kind of knew last yr would be her last so tried to make it happy but I don't think it worked. The pictures are very sad.
I think people should be free to choose what they wish to do without pressure from others.