CSA for 5 kids

Zara33

kelloggs36 wrote: »

Zara - are you sure that Loopychicken was referring to you? I am a bit confused. MJ mum did not apologise so I thought she was referring to somebody else???

I'm kinda assuming that she is actually having a pop at both myself and MJMUM as we have a different view to her on another thread, which tbh should not be taken into this thread.

I may disagree on certain things but that doesn't mean anything at all we are all entitled to have our opinion, not so long ago i had different views with MJMUM but lo and behold we actually agree on other things.

I certainly do not belong to a clique and my views are that my own, yes sometimes i'm as subtle as a sledgehammer but that's just who i am

donny_osmonds_mad_fan

hi....can I ask something?? oh well will anyways lol....has your ex partner been on benefits for the 3 yrs they have been trying to trace him? I would ask that question because the way you describe him (no offence) maybe he has and maybe them not being able to trace him was another case of the csa not bothering to do anything.

I would raise a formal complaint with them, ask for it to be looking into specifically as if he has been on benefits for those 3 years there is no reason or excuse for them not being able to trace him is there?

Just a thought I thought I would bring up...if they have failed they may have to compensate you

I have to say the csa touch wood arent too bad with me, but then that is the plymouth office, I had the bad misfortune of dealing with a north west one recently and it was a nightmare. You do have to nag constantly take notes and ring back the same people and become a bit of a polite nusience.

My ex never paid, they tracked him, even sent officers to ID him working, I sent a picture to a local london office and within 48 hours they rang me with a positive id once they did that they could do an attachement of earings order and as he hd refused to return the paperwork by that point it was a massive monthly fine to persuade him, it was over £900 a month of course he was in touch with them wanting to comply right away begging for a refund however he also got stung that emergency amount for the next 2 mths too until the paperwork was returned assement done etc and as they had known his whereabouts it was arrears so mine to keep kids sure got treated those 3 mths...I keep on top of them and nag the csa senseless.

He had 2 kids with me and stopped seeing/having contact with the kids the month he must have found out his new girlfriend was pregnant...they have 3 kids now and judging by the assesment my gut feeling is she is claiming incom support as he doesnt declare the kids to them...which is a bit weird...hey ho not my problem.

good luck and push for more answers, I would ring them and ask for your case worker/team and dont ring the general number they are pants get the number for the local office its on the site. Say you happened to hear he had been on benefits for a number of years and see what they say.

I have complained a few times and you normally get a £50 compensation payment...not much but some recognition for stress they put you through!

bogblog

I'm in the same boat, my ex only pays me a fiver a week. He's been looking for a job for ages. I think he's waiting until the kids have left home so he doesn't have to pay me anything! You have my sympathy!

space_rider

Molly, I thought I was bad off. My ex husband has never been absent, he has always had our children 3 days out of 7 but has worked the system to his advantage as he is self employed. my maintenance for 3 children is double yours! Thank goodness for tax credits.

MJMum

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Toto

Sometimes absent parent is the perfect description. My son's dad walked out on us 16 years ago and we haven't seen him since. He has never had any contact, never paid a penny. Is nothing other than the absent parent. Sometimes the term absent doesn't fit at all and I understand when a parent is sharing responsibility why it would cause offence to be called absent. But for heavens sake can we not use common sense before getting our stroppy PC hats on? If the OP isn't talking about you when she uses the term absent parent maybe she feels that describes her situation because calling my son's dad a non resident parent would personally offend me. He needs to do something other than conceive the child to earn the title of parent.

kelloggs36

Absolutely Toto, couldn't have said it as well myself!!!!

a1969baby

I also agree with Toto.. my son is 18 next week and hasn't seen his dad since his 4th birthday! What else can he be called but absent?!

thesaint

a1969baby wrote: »

I also agree with Toto.. my son is 18 next week and hasn't seen his dad since his 4th birthday! What else can he be called but absent?!

I don't think that anyone is saying that the term absent parent can not be used correctly, don't you get that?

kelloggs36

Calm down!!