Nice people thread part 7 - a thread in its prime

Generali

silvercar wrote: »

At a job interview everyone ups their skill levels.

DS2 is nearly 19. He would be fine with the kids, he's gained a lot of experience babysitting his cousins. Fine with the driving (after a few hours practice driving a bigger car and gaining familiarity etc) You would probably be horrified by his download volumes. He would be honest. His cooking would be limited unless you train him to do more and his food shopping to prepare meals would be dire.

DS1 is 22. He is disinterested in kids. His driving would not be confident and his spatial awareness is not great. His cooking is better, though I'm not sure he could manage a roast he is a dab hand with the hob; you would get stir frys, omelettes etc He is honest but has a tendency to get very defensive very quickly.

I asked him about that volume of downloads, he said she probably set it to download a few films and maybe send batches of her videos to mates and left it running.

Can't explain her not answering the door or her phone, which is most worrying.

Yes they do but there is a difference between upping your skills and telling someone you can do something you can't.

What did she expect to happen when she actually had to drive a car or cook a meal? We're really not after Cordon Bleu stuff here, just some simple protein, veg & carbs meal of whatever type she would like to cook.

We're not after someone with high security defensive driving skills, just someone that can potter around very wide, low traffic neighbourhood streets at low speed.

If she'd said that she was downloading videos then that would have been fine. The thing was, she insisted that she was downstairs with the kids all the time. If she is going to lie to me then I have to sack her. The other stuff was a massive pain in the Aris but not a deal breaker. If you want to look after my kids then I have to be able to believe what you say about the time when you are in charge of them.

I gave her every opportunity: I said to her, "I do not believe what you are saying to me. Please give me a reason to keep you on. I don't want to fire you so tell me why I shouldn't".

Nada.

I understand that it's really tough for her, she's young and a long way from home but that doesn't mean I compromise my children's safety. Loads of young women apply for jobs as au pairs with identical duties to ours including many friends I had when I was younger who were doing language degrees.

Nikkster

GDB2222 wrote: »

Surely, this is a matter for your manager to, umm, manage? Give him the problem to sort out!

Its a bit different when you work in a lab and are in the middle of an experiment!

JonnyBravo

Generali wrote: »

The thing was, she insisted that she was downstairs with the kids all the time. If she is going to lie to me then I have to sack her. The other stuff was a massive pain in the Aris but not a deal breaker. If you want to look after my kids then I have to be able to believe what you say about the time when you are in charge of them.

I gave her every opportunity: I said to her, "I do not believe what you are saying to me. Please give me a reason to keep you on. I don't want to fire you so tell me why I shouldn't".

You did the right thing. 100%. Don't beat yourself up about it.

Generali

JonnyBravo wrote: »

You did the right thing. 100%. Don't beat yourself up about it.

I did do the right thing as my primary responsibility is to my family. I do also have other responsibilities including to my au pair.

She's found a place to live and is moving out tomorrow. I told her to treat us as an insurance policy: if she finds herself in a bad situation then she should call and maybe we can help.

BertieUK

Generali wrote: »

I did do the right thing as my primary responsibility is to my family. I do also have other responsibilities including to my au pair.

She's found a place to live and is moving out tomorrow. I told her to treat us as an insurance policy: if she finds herself in a bad situation then she should call and maybe we can help.

You have done the most honourable thing for the young lady, now she can start a new chapter in her chosen career and move on knowing that she has someone to call upon for guidance in the future. This has been a lesson in the learning for both of you.

Welldone I commend you to the house.:)

michaels

GDB2222 wrote: »

I briefed DD on how to drive in these conditions - don't go over 10 MPH where it's snowy. However, apparently, I should also have told her that it takes longer to stop. She came back complaining that the brakes did not work and went 'bumpety-bumpety'. Well, at least she didn't hit anything and the ABS is definitely working.

Its funny as the car failed to stop I found myself pumping the brakes, old habits die hard. The snow isn't always a give-away as even where it appears that the tyre tracks are black and road there is often actually a layer of ice (sometimes with a little melt water on top). I am trying to persaude DW to do a test stop when she starts each journey, I always find this the most effective way of reminding myself that things are slippery.

SC which airline should we be boycotting? BA do not seem to have covered themselves in glory this time - last year they cancelled everyhting and it seemed to work OK but I guess that is so expensive they hoped to get away wiith things this time?

Mr G your feelings of 'guilt' demonstrate you clearly have a caring side however your decision is made, you made it for your family and thus it was the right one; don't beat yourself up about it. Is this the first time you have ever had to 'let someone go'?

Spirit_2

GDB2222 wrote: »

I briefed DD on how to drive in these conditions - don't go over 10 MPH where it's snowy. However, apparently, I should also have told her that it takes longer to stop. She came back complaining that the brakes did not work and went 'bumpety-bumpety'. Well, at least she didn't hit anything and the ABS is definitely working.

That is quie sweet and it obviously would have been your fault if she had gone into the back of anything because you did not tell her that bit.

As part of a birthday present a few years ago DD went on a skidpan course and said on Friday that it came back to her - she has gone to work in her car this morning and was quite happy with wellies and snacks in the car. Mr S has gone to London on the train - there is a reduced schedule - and is well prepared which is out of character for him - he has a flask of coffee and ceral bars in his rucksack as he has prior experience of being stuck on a very cold broken down train for hours.

I have a day of holiday as I planned some time off whilst I adapted to new dosage of injectable so I will be pottering about. Biggest decison today is what to make for dinner. Second big decision is whether to do the ironing or not.

Wheezy_2

HAMISH_MCTAVISH wrote: »

And a real influx of political trolls and the racist element.

It used to be that we'd all have a bit of spirited debate and banter.

Now it's become much nastier in tone, some really vile bigoted attitudes, and a lot more personal attacks from "the gang". I'm happy to give as good as I get, and as most people know I'm thick skinned, but it's just getting daft.

I noticed that too Hamish...and it's the main reason I don't get involved. There's no point debating bigots and racists - and my blood pressure is already high enough as it is.

Anyway, I'm off to defecate in the pond and eat a swan as that's what immigrants do it seems.

SingleSue

The school run was fine once I was out on the main roads, digging the car out and getting to the main road not so fun or fine but we did it.

I learnt how to snow drive whilst doing my driving lessons, 2 weeks before the test, we had major snow down here and I had driving lessons booked, so we carried on and I got to know what to do...huge bonus but very eek and stressful at the time. That said, I don't get over confident about my skills just because I have been taught how to do it but then neither do I panic about it too much.

Grrr, just been told on Facebook I should have made the boys walk to school this morning, not once but twice and both of them know James' joints dislocate....would like to see them walk 3 miles with constantly dislocating joints in the snow.

lostinrates

I have to say, not yours with promblems Sue, but it does shock me how
Lily livered some kids/ familes are about walking to school.

While out I felt better so collected my car. Because it was covered with snow there was no ice ( hurrah) so took about seven swipes of my arm to clear windscreens ( I admit I left roof snow, which it naughty).

Now home, put a chilli in the oven for the others tonight and have drawled back up to relax.