ex boyfriend owes me money

rewass

hi peeps,
am after some advice really and don't really know where else to turn, here is the story...

in 2007 my partner at the time told me he was in debt, was really behind with his rent and that the council were threatening to kick him out of his flat. of course, wanting to help him, i gave him a grand to bring him up to date with his rent and pay off other bills. i wasn't expecting it back at the time, cos we were in a relationship, but after we broke up i wanted the money back i mean £1000 is a lot of money, especially after i found out why he was in debt (travelling the country to meet other women) of course i would never have given it him if i'd known that! tried asking for it back, got false promises from him that he would pay it back, never received a penny.

i am still in touch with his ex best friend who unfortunately hasn't been able to help as he's no longer in touch with him either (he owes him money as well, also he seems to owe lots of people money). i contacted him on facebook a couple of years ago and just got nasty responses before he blocked me so am unable to contact him by facebook now, and i no longer have his phone number. but i did find out that he'd moved away and got married his wife even contacted me on facebook and i tried to sort it out with her... but she is about as useful as a chocolate fireguard!!! and now she's blocked me as well, probably because she got sick of my repeated requests.

just want to know where i stand really if i want to take this further, i've always promised myself i won't give up without a fight and the way he humiliated me and his attitude on facebook is just making me even more determined if anything. the last message i got from his wife said they'd split up and he'd move back down south. i should be able to track his parents' address and i will have proof that i gave him the money (i wrote a cheque in his friend's name, his friend then cashed it and gave him the money, so i will have a bank statement as proof) any replies on what i should do would be appreciated, small claims court maybe? cheers

robpw2

i feel like i have to do my judge judy moment
you had no intentiton of asking for the money back and if you werie still in a relationship you wouldnt be asking for it back. its only because you have split up and feel hurt that you know want this money back.

to go to the small claims court you will need to proove that this was a loan and not merely a gift and there was an arrangement to pay back , because from what you have said in your post it doesnt seem like this at .

also as you made payment to his frined and not to him directly there is no proof he ever had the money

shegirl

As rob says,you gave it to him and didn't expect it back because you were in a relationship.Now you want it back after a split and humiliation.

That's not how it works!No matter what 'proof' you have it doesn't make the slightest difference.You can't use the courts to get the money back because it isn't owed to you.

newcook

think of it as a small price to pay to get rid of an @rsehole! thats what I thought when my ex owed me £3k!

Nottoobadyet

Expensive lesson, write it off and move on.

podperson

rewass wrote: »

i should be able to track his parents' address and i will have proof that i gave him the money (i wrote a cheque in his friend's name, his friend then cashed it and gave him the money, so i will have a bank statement as proof) any replies on what i should do would be appreciated, small claims court maybe? cheers

I'm sorry but you don't really have any 'proof' - you have a cheque that you wrote out to someone else, and I'm assuming nothing in writing to say either that the money went to your ex afterwards or that it was actually a loan and not just money being passed between two people in a relationship.

The reason for this is because it wasn't a loan! A loan is an agreement between two people that has to be agreed at the time - you can't decided afterwards that it's now turned into a loan because you've broken up with him.

Taking it to small claims court would be costly and time consuming - and I really don't fancy your chances. As others have said, I think you need to let it go x

hazyjo

It was a gift, not a loan. As harsh as it seems, write it off and put it down to experience.

The second you open your mouth in any court and say it was a gift, it'll be case closed.

Jx

Fire_Fox

rewass wrote: »

hi peeps,
am after some advice really and don't really know where else to turn, here is the story...

in 2007 my partner at the time told me he was in debt, was really behind with his rent and that the council were threatening to kick him out of his flat. of course, wanting to help him, i gave him a grand to bring him up to date with his rent and pay off other bills. i wasn't expecting it back at the time, cos we were in a relationship, but after we broke up i wanted the money back i mean £1000 is a lot of money, especially after i found out why he was in debt (travelling the country to meet other women) of course i would never have given it him if i'd known that! tried asking for it back, got false promises from him that he would pay it back, never received a penny.
s

Sorry to hear this happened to you but it sounds like you gifted it to me you didn't loan it, in which case you are not legally entitled to the money back. You didn'r even give the money to him you have it to an intermediary, so you'd have to prove that they passed the cash to your ex on your behalf. IMO you would have to lie in court which I am sure you don't want to do.

daska

You have no proof either that he received the money or that it was a loan - because it wasn't. Consider it a relatively cheap lesson and move on - he'd have cost you a lot more if you'd stayed together!

balletshoes

You won't get this money back. Accept that, and let it go. Harbouring this will just cause you upset, nobody else.

You have no proof that it was a loan, because it wasn't. You have no proof you gave him the money, because you didn't (the cheque was written out to someone else). You wouldn't stand a chance in court.

McKneff

I love Judge Judy Rob, even when I was reading the oP, she came to mind, then I read her name in your answer.

Great minds eh.

OP - no chance...................