Putting My Life Into Order

catandy

first day at my new job and ive got to say it wasnt a thrill a minute, infact its a take your brain out and do what ive got to do job, and thats going to suit me just fine for now.;) wages from new job plus benefits cover all the bills plus about 50£ unaccounted for which will be used to start chipping away at the balances. going to take forever at that rate but at the moment its all ive got so ive just got to bite the bullett and get on with it.

business with ex is covering the overheads and a bit besides which means we can afford to pay for the final tranche of development work without me dipping into my money. which again is a big plus cos there isnt any! me being out at work meant that ex had nothing to do but get on with doing work on the business and hes actually been more productive today than he usually is in a week - so I think Im going to have to stick with the job to make sure he does what hes meant to.:rotfl:Company who are using the software have given us their business plan covering the next 4 months as they ramp up their output so we've got some idea what is coming. All infinately do-able so I've got no concerns with any of it.

ive worked out budget over the next 2 months with short wages with part months and xmas holidays and so on and still can manage to pay everything with some leeway so I'm doing ok - which is really quite surprising all told... I dont know where this sensible head came from but I like it oh and christmas will be all cash this year no plastic involved at all which is the first time thats happened for like the last 3 years or so.

catandy

Ive got my head down at the home based job today - Im only going to make £60 from it this month but its enough to cover 2 credit card payments so its going to be done. And next month I do some every day whether I feel like it or not...

today has ended up being a 'spendy day' as I ended up buying S1 some shoes mind you he had walked thru the soles on his others so he did need them did some shopping to top up perishables so that should be it virtually for the week now. famous last words uh cos i know something will come up it always does!

catandy

I broke my duck today at the new job and started earning commission :T- just by hitting target every day that will make me an extra £300 per month to start taking off the totals - which really needs to happen. i looked at what was being achieved today and 75% of the people I work with hit target every month so it is achievable with realism this isnt going to happen until after the christmas break as no one is buying anything at this time of year (im in sales so Dec is notoriously difficult). so just making preperation for the new year at this stage...

catandy

I've taken some time out to work out where I stand with the new job and bills and it just doesnt add up however I juggle it.

Ive worked out my basic wage plus benefits as my income as commission is not guaranteed ie I have to hit target to get it! (I hit it one day out of 4 on my first week at the job) I've also pared the bills to the bone even more - Im paying minimums on my rent arrears now (saving me 30 pm) plus have cancelled all but essential spend. I'm even bussing it to and from work every day taking 2 hours of my life each day and saving another 50 quid a month -my mobile phone is cancelled from january saving another 15 pm but despite all that I'm still £496 short each and every month!:eek::eek::eek: - i dont have anything else to sell and I dont have any time left to do a part time job around the full time job i have - I'm not capable of anything when I get in apart from cooking the evening meal and collapsing.

Ive spoken to StepChange and an advisor there originally said to me to do a DMP, I then filled in all the forms and spoke to someone again who said an IVA was a better bet....

First payments out to CC's that I'm going to not be able to make are next week and I'm totally lost as to what to do - I've put my loan on a payment holiday this month but I've got to do something with regards to the CC companies cos they will start chasing as soon as the first payment goes awry.

The business is paying for itself (just) and will continue to do so if it just stays as it is any extra is money in the bank for us. Another problem we have is the business account is with Bank of Scotland which is linked to the Halifax which is where my OD and loan are. the business bank account was opened in my name as the signatory which means its sort of linked to my personal account... I dont know whether to stand down as a company director and get ex and business partner to become the main signatory on the business account - mind you he probably needs a personal bank account first cos he's still not sorted that out..

the stress of all of this is making me ill - all im doing is bursting into tears cos i cant find a way forward or know what to do. ex is telling me that i should max the rest of my credit cards out totally, get any extra credit i can to pay for the business overheads for the next 3 months or so upfront (so its got at least 6 months to make or break) and then do a DMP or even go bankrupt - as 'it wipes the slate clean and gives me my life back'. This sounds really bad and i cant believe that im even halfway considering it - ive pumped over 20k into this business over the last 3 years and part of it was to set my sons up with a small residual income for as long as it was kept live - the business itself is so close to working we can almost taste it we just need some time (and of course christmas is at the wrong time this year as it will die over the festive period).

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Suggestions really are welcomed at the moment - that is if anyone made it reading thru this far without slitting their wrists that is - sorry im a real little doom and gloom merchant at the moment but i cant see what to do at all and i just dont have anyone to talk to at all. how the hell did i become so cut off from the world and people??

*Robin*

catandy wrote: »

ex is telling me that i should max the rest of my credit cards out totally, get any extra credit i can to pay for the business overheads for the next 3 months or so upfront (so its got at least 6 months to make or break) and then do a DMP or even go bankrupt - as 'it wipes the slate clean and gives me my life back'. This sounds really bad and i cant believe that im even halfway considering it

Haang on! ..What exactly is Ex doing to come up with his half of the business/house running costs?
Looking at it from the outside, that's where your shortfall lies.

His bedroom is worth money to you. If he's not handing it over, then he really has to go and live somewhere else. Unless you're in a very desirable location and the room has an en-suite, it probably won't bring in quite enough to cover the £496, but you'll be a lot closer than you are now.

You'll also be somewhat better insulated against Ex's bl@@dy stupid ideas!

Might be a good idea to 'phone the CC companies before the payments fail.. (I've never been in your exact position, but do know I've always got a better result by pre-empting an impending disaster).

catandy wrote: »

how the hell did i become so cut off from the world and people??

Well it could be argued that you have access to more people than you've ever had in your life before, by coming on MSE..
But I can't help wondering how much your Ex's controlling behaviour* has a part in making you feel isolated in RL?
* Yes it is - suggesting you should max out your cards and then go bankrupt while he does nothing to rectify the mess he's helped you to get into, is definitely controlling behaviour in my book! :mad:

triple_choc_chip

Hi Catandy, I'm de-lurking to say 'keep calm and carry on' and please ignore the ex!

I have to admit that your posts frustrate me too because you swing from really positive to really dire and back again almost on a daily basis!

In October you mentioned a family loan of £3k that would pay off the 3 most expensive cards - did you take up that offer?

You also mentioned £500 overdraft facility that you were paying for but not using - did you use it to pay down some debts?

You have mentioned several times that the business is holding its own and there may be extra cash that will become additional income for you - then why on earth are you even discussing maxing credit cards to put into that business, when you know it doesn't need it? And why stress about the bank accounts being linked when it isn't a problem as long as the business ticks along.

The part time job you were doing at home - is this something the ex is able to do? If not, can you teach him and then expect him to keep it going?

I hope this hasn't been too harsh, because the last thing you need right now is people nagging you, but you did ask :rotfl:

You are so capable and brave and you are taking a risk starting a business that should eventually pay off big time and that is what seperates the successful business people from the rest. While its at this stage the stress is huge but when it all comes right you can enjoy the rewards. Best of luck.

catandy

ive opened a new bank account totally separate from the one with my od and bank loan linked to it. tomorrow i contact tax credits and child benefit and get it paid into this account moving forward. I also get work to change it so my wages go into this account.

ive also contacted the first CC co to tell them there is an issue with their payment. theyve given me an extra 2 weeks to make payment (and charged me for it) so ive got 2 weeks to decide what to do and do it. ive got the other cc to contact and have the same conversation with but ive started the ball rolling.

business has been running properly allbeit at about half capacity with the one main contract for 4 weeks - it has paid for itself and covered all the running costs for this month and next. Up that to full capacity which wont happen until the new year and it should be covering costs and making £1000 in profit. Ok thats not riches beyond belief but it will sure take the pressure off a bit. and to be honest that 1k per month will be swallowed up paying off for the last part of the development work but at least its not coming out of my money as it has been up to now.

the business owes me 20k or thereabouts for what ive pumped into it so far to get it up and running and ex put in 6k to start it all off - scary money isnt it? if i had known when we started this it would have taken this long to realise it fully and cost so much to do we wouldnt have done it at all. and that kind of explains why im in the mess im in as well

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job wise for me i think i maybe going back to freelancing in the new year - ok its hit and miss but it still pays more than a full time employed job and the problem with having a full time employed job is it doesnt leave me any time to go to interviews for better paid full time employed jobs cos i have to keep working to keep money coming in. the part time job from home ive messed up for november i didnt hit payout so earnt nothing at it cos i was too busy having meltdowns about being broke. im not sure whether im going to be able to fit it in around a full time job and commuting but I need to sit down and make a decision and stick to it. In all reality I think the short term solution at this moment is to do a DMP probably thru stepchange at least until my income matches my outgoings again and doesnt run at a deficit.

my credit history is going to be taking a battering with all this going on - but you know what I never want credit again in my life. as soon as the cards are paid off and the loan settled im never getting in debt again in my life - if I cant afford something I save for it, just the way I taught by my parents but the call of easy credit proved to be too big a lure - it doesnt feel like real money does it when its peices of plastic?

catandy

I've decided to do the DMP route with Stepchange at least until my income matches my expenditure again - Ive been getting the documentation I need together and opening a new bank account / moving all the essential DD over to it so now I'm just waiting for my call from one of their advisers and to get all the documentation off to them and tell all the creditors that they are handling it for now - thats going to be the scary part of all this

The new job did me an estimation of earnings showing what I would take home on a month that I hit all my commission and get my bonus and it still leaves me £450 short of what I need to be able to pay the bills at the minimums so I will need to make a change of job a priority as soon as the new year is here. Or go back to freelancing and the rollercoaster that brings - dont know and havent looked that far ahead yet. I just know I need to do something as soon as I can in the new year.

I'm also in the process of finding staff to sell our software from the new year and setting all the machinations of that up as well. This is a complete unknown entity ie we dont know if its going to be succesful or not but its something I can manage remotely and I have taken on staff in the past to work for me on similar campaigns so I just omit all the mistakes I made first time round and it should work out:)

Ex is actually working now that the business has been turned over to him - the responsibility is all with him now so perhaps he needed that kick to make him get on with it. I've already written off the money that ive pumped into it over the past 2 years - if he manages to kick it into action and making profits after everything is paid for I do believe that the company will pay me back for the investment I made but theres a lot of ifs there so I'm just concentrating on the here and now and what I can control. My son is still down as a company director but Im thinking of taking him off it as well - that way its a clean break and the onus is the on the ex to firstly make a go of the company and secondly do the right thing by paying me back what im owed from the co and look after my son from the co the same as he plans to his kids.

Apart from all that Im just wishing that xmas and new year was out of the way so next year starts in earnest and I can get on with things - pretty sad uh wishing my life away like this?

catandy

well the bad news is I've lost my job :eek:- the good news is my rent and council tax is covered from today meaning that I cant get evicted due to the arrears on my rent account which means my kids and I arent going to end up homeless (which has been a growing worry the way things have been going )

anyways I'm taking it as a chance to take stock, regroup and decide what to do next. ive started my claim for jsa from today and ive got one interview lined up for tomorrow so i will go to that and see what happens. the job tomorrow is home based so it means that I could do that and fit in the freelancing work around it like i did last year. it also means I could monitor the people I have taken on to sell our software when they start in January so makes sense ... just got to get the job now.

business is doing ok - 5 shifts covered by the one company this week so should make us about £500 in profit (judging by past history),,, just a shame it doesnt get paid out for 5 or 6 weeks depending on which payment processor its all done thru - its a nightmare taking payments on the internet cos it all takes so long to get payout.

this is for the best - thats what im telling myself and im on for my call with CCCS on monday of next week to start putting my DMP in place. This will all work out for the best and perhaps it had to get to this stage before it would get better who knows?!?

catandy

Well I didnt get the job - it was advertised for 15K basic but I was offered it on commission only for a 3 month trial - which I told them was not of interest in the slightest. It annoys me that companies seem to think that my job/ role can be 'cheapened' and offered on just a commission only basis 'until Ive shown that I can do it'. I also wish fervently that I had some other skill in life apart from what I do for a living ....:o

ive got my meeting at the jobcentre today with the personal adviser to put my claim into activated mode and give me some advice on how to find a job... will be interesting to see if they come up with something I havent thought about.

the DMP is going to take a bit of time to put in place - my new bank account is open but no payments have yet been moved across to it, my jsa payments will not be in place until the last few days of this year or first part of next so they cannot set up a DD as there will be no funds in there! also the estimation they gave me for my spend is not accurate - we put down 88 per month for electric - we dont have gas and so far this month ive pumped 100 into the meter... None of the CC companies have jumped yet to chase me I got a very polite email reminder from the first one yesterday thats late being paid. by next week they will all start chasing in earnest. Im just going with the flow now - ive spent so long stressing about all this im just doing what i can do when i can do it and letting the rest of it sort itself out
ive got a salesforce lined up for january onwards to sell our software and everything is organised and ready to go so thats all prepared and waiting to kick off.

ive done the stats for the business this month and worked out we've made a profit of just short of 760 in 50 hours of the system being live over last month or this or that we make 15£ profit for each hour the system is live and working and being used.. just need to get them to use the system more now and be live for more hours each week:)

the companies expenses are paid for dec and jan and theres money there in the business account to cover feb and march or it could cover feb and the bills that it generates into the house that im going to struggle to pay - internet connection, mobile phone bill so the company would be totally self financing and my money would be my money to live off and pay into my DMP. Decisions uh?