Wedding Tips start here...

VickyA_2

Ooooh and another one. Jewellers don't think that engaged couples are the best thing since sliced bread. My engagement ring is going to be made from a diamond that was in Mr-Nearly-VickyA's gran's ring, but it's going to be set in platinum for me. We took it to a "family owned since 1880" jewellers in a local town on Monday to ask for a quote. An assistant served us, but evidently we were the first people that she'd dealt with on this matter. She did her best, but her case wasn't helped by her boss (the owner?) being really huffy saying things like "well, it'll have to be handmade" er yes, I think we're aware of that and "it's going to cost £xxx". Oooh, you don't say, it's going to cost money? We left the ring there, then managed to talk ourselves out of it as we were going round the other shops, so reclaimed it.

This weekend we're off up to my parents' house in Lincolnshire and we're taking it into a jewellers up there who are more than willing to help us. Apparently they've had a few people in from London who haven't found anyone willing to help them. The best bit is: I've had jewellery from them before and most pieces are handmade and doesn't cost a fortune.

macchicken

Vicky A
Try going to an indpendant goldsmiths rather than a jewellers, if you dont know your local goldsmith pop into your local H Samuel or ernest jones and ask who their goldsmith is (because i know they contract out their repair work) i wouldn't tell them why though, or try the yellow pages.
This means you can meet the man who will make your ring!
A while ago there was a thread about engagement rings.
If anyone can remember the advice which was on the perhaps they can post it up! Or it might still be about somewhere!
Thanks and happy shopping!

lynneinjapan

My mum has been great about my wedding: right from the start she's insisted that it's up to us what we do, because her parents' attitude to her own wedding was that THEY were paying for it and so THEY got to decide how it was organised, who was invited, etc. Even so, Mum & Dad are financing the whole thing (up to £7000 - but they know I'll derive pleasure from doing it for less!). I'm the first of four sisters so they might be a bit less keen by the time the fourth one gets married!

I've made my own bridesmaids' dresses: 50p for the pattern, a bargain £10 for 5m of gold satin and £2 for the lining fabric, all off the markets. The zips had to come from a department store so they cost another £10, and there was thread and interfacing to buy too... but that's still less than £30 for the lot. (I saw the same satin a couple of months later in the John Lewis sale for £5/metre.) In case you're reading this and thinking "well, she must know what she's doing with a sewing machine", I think it's worth pointing out that the only other item I've ever made from a sewing pattern was a polycotton nightshirt 20 years ago when I was at school, so doing fitted, lined outfits in satin was a big step up! My reasoning was that even if they were a disaster, it wasn't a lot of money to waste. I've gone for two-piece outfits so that hopefully they'll be able to wear at least part of the outfit again: a fitted gold satin top with spaghetti straps should also look good with jeans for a night out! They've taken a good few hours to do but have come out not too badly. Now I'm wondering what else I can make!

VickyA_2

Thanks macchicken. We went to a jewellers in my parents' local town on Sunday who were more than helpful and now have the job to make my engagement ring. It's costing half the price that the other jeweller suggested. They will also give us 20% off the wedding rings when the time comes.

I like the sound of your bridesmaids dresses, lynne. You can always make the dresses for my wedding....................

nh

To save money... I have to make sure my fiance stays well out of it!

Every time he gets involved the price doubles :eek:

He is no MSEer I can tell you that.

What we have done to save money

No cake (who ever eats it?) - if you want to have cake go to M&S
No favours
I am making my own invitations/order of service (the more guests you have the more you save here)
We are getting married on a Sunday (20% off food at reception)
Just having one car (will make two trips)

The wedding is still costing £13,500 :eek: but think what it would cost if I hadn't saved in those areas? We are having 150 guests (+ 100 in evening) and I have booked a really cool Beatles tribute band which is £900 so that is what is costing most of the money.

Vickya - when the mother in law asks if your fiance's twin will be involved, just say no! Do you have sisters? Round our way everyone seems to have their fiance's sister(s) as bridesmaids but I didn't want to - but as I have four sisters of my own and none of them are being my bridesmaids either it is the perfect excuse not to have my fiance's sister. Not that anyone has bothered that I haven't asked her... it's just she was bridesmaid for her other brother's wedding last year and she had her own husband's sister as one of hers.

You have to be very strong from the start that you are having what you want. Your mother in law will just be jealous cos I bet her own mother/mother-in-law took over her wedding - now she wants to do the same to you!

VickyA_2

Hi nh,

Mr-nearly-VickyA's mum has calmed down a bit, but "joked" the other day about her grandson being a page boy (he won't even be 2 by the time of our wedding). I did say NO as I don't want an attendant who will "steal my thunder because he's so adorable". I think she understood and I did point out that my two bridesmaids will be my two best friends that I've known for x amount of years.

My mum is having kittens over the cost of the wedding, but I'm lucky that my parents are willing to pay for it all. She's making the cake - and my grandad's 90th birthday cake this August will be the "trial run" for the recipe.

Using a diamond from my fiance's late gran is saving us a fortune on the engagement ring. We're having a single small diamond set in platinum and the shop will give us 20% off our wedding rings when the time comes. Actually, the diamond is beautiful, not perfect, but beautiful.

As for the invitations and orders of service, I'd love to make my own, but I think that I'll have to have practice runs on friends' birthday cards!!!!

nh

A good site for invitations/order of service stuff is madaboutcards.com.

They have these A5 size cards that are already scored and have an embossed inch-square square on the front - perfect for sticking hearts etc in - that is what I am doing for my invitations - and I am not creative at all.

Then they have "wedding invitation" and "order of service" stickers to stick on the front too - people can't even tell they are stickers.

I think spending loads on your wedding is silly (says me spending £15k) but what "loads" is depends on what you get for your money. Like I said before, it's a band I really want and we are having 150 guests, and we can afford it, which is another important factor.

Don't get yourself into debt and don't get your parents into debt for it - it is not worth it! People will understand if they are not invited to the day do, just invite them for drinks later.

Or get married at around 4pm and only serve a buffet at 7pm, that will save loads!

My fiance's mum paid for all his sister's wedding (£14k), unfortunately they are not quite doing the same for their son (my fiance) - is this fair? – but anyway, they didn't have anywhere to live and were loads in debt already. They are still trying to dig themselves out of debt now, two years on. That is a miserable way to spend the first years of marriage - I am sure the day itself has not made up for it.

I have thought of something else we are not having in order to save money – the toast, £4.50 a head for champers! We are just giving people the table wine to toast with!

Good luck with your plans - there are exciting (and frustrating - it will feel like an age until it's you time) times ahead!

VickyA_2

£4.50 a head for champers? That's outrageous! The caterers that we're having will serve the champagne that we buy and chill it in their van (some stuff currently £9.99 in Tesco from £19.99). They will also do the same for all the wine that we have and keep people topped up.

I like the idea of the cards, maybe I'll have a quick trial run. I'd love to do that sort of thing as it's quite different.

We are going to be cutting back on a few things - ladies in the village will be doing flower arrangements for the church and table arrangements, for instance. No cars to take me/anyone to or from the church as I'll be walking. Hopefully a distant uncle will be doing the photos (already proved himself in the wedding photo field!), which will cost considerably less than my friend's £1000 photographer.

Thing with live music, I never really know where to start. I think it's great if you know the band/know their music. Another friend had "The Roulettes" (as in Adam Faith and the Roulettes) at her wedding because they performed on numerous occasions at her Father in law's pub. They were great, but since then apparently they've stopped performing. And unless Westlife were to reduce their fee, I wouldn't know where to start!

My fiance's parents aren't contributing anything to the wedding. They have two daughters and so have some money saved for them but not fiance. It might not be entirely fair in today's society, but we're lucky that my parents are very traditional in the sense that they are expecting to pay for the whole thing (bar honeymoon). On the plus side, we have been left a small deposit for a house by fiance's gran.

nh

Well done with the photographer - they are outrageously expensive and who ever looks at their wedding photos (when was the last time your parents got theirs out?). We got ours for £650, he's a young, reportage photographer (fewer staged pictures where there's about 40 people on the pic so you can't see anyone!) so we are well pleased. It means the ushers won't be running around shouting 'bride's family' etc - thank goodness!

Why don't you consider a Westlife tribute band. We are having a Beatles tribute band because we saw one ot a wedding once and it was such good fun - for all ages.

Try https://www.tribute-entertainment.co.uk for all sorts of bands/acts.

Having your do in the marquee will save you loads in champagne/wine costs. We are having sparkly for welcome drinks (£5 a bottle - reduced from £10 at Tesco, £10 corkage) and table wine from France (£3.50 a bottle for white, £2.50 for red - £8 corkage) so it is not cheap.

Your problem with where guests will stay is tricky. I have a similar problem cos there is some acommodation at the reception but not much and the nearest hotel after that is seven miles away. It is not that bad cos people can get taxis for a tenner but when it is 20 miles away that is expensive. Maybe a coach would be best? It might be pricey but possibly the guests who use it could contribute (get a friend who will be staying at the hotel to organise it - she can collect the £2 a person or whatever it will cost).

nikkipink22

Have started to organise my wedding and would like some ideas on how i could save some money?