Non-coupon related Drivel Thread 8

Best_price

http://your.asda.com/baby-club/ella-s-kitchen-lunchbag-competition

Win a limited edition lunchbag full of goodies from Ella's Kitchen


This month on the Asda Baby and Toddler club we’ve got five boxes of Ella’s Kitchen goodies to give away.

myalphabetgirls

Long post alert! lol

thank you all so very much for your thoughtful comments, I know each and every one of them has come from the heart and I am glad I felt I could open up and let out what was troubling me. Unfortunately when I do let go the words tumble out like heavy rain and very soon my rambly posts can cause a monsoon. I did not want to bring the thread down, so many of you have already held me up when I have fallen and I am forever grateful.

My sister is 18 years old than me, for many years we were not close. She left home and joined the wrens before I was born and married into the Navy so from then on always lived away. She was more a distant aunt than anything. When I was 16 she got divorced and moved back to the local area with her kids and she and I became close. Until I lost Chloe then Rebecca and I were close despite her living in Devon and me Somerset. Not only was it the financial furore that kicked off and hit raw nerves when I approached my Dad for some help with funding Chloe's funeral (and I would have paid him back) but given that my sister only lives an hour 30mins tops away she had every excuse under the sun why she could not come and be with me despite my despair in the face of tragedy. My last contact with her was a text message two days before Chloe's funeral when she was still umming and ahhing about how she would get to Weston because her husband was on shift, she would have to change trains, where would she stay... blah blah. I argued in disbelief that I didnt need to know all that carp, I just needed her here. My final words to her was to let her know that I would give up our bed for her if she came. I have not had any contact with her from that time. My parents and my sister (and her husband) were there at the funeral but they kept their distance and as the event draw to a close they all walked away back to the car leaving my mum who was only able to give me a brief hug and a request of me of "no more tears" and "please don't ring". Yes, I appreciate my mum's fear of my dad if she disobeyed him. I feel my sister was fearful for her inheritance and chose to protect that over comforting me. A short while later my niece gave birth to my sister's first grandchild and I cannot believe she would have held that baba in her arms and not felt empathy for me. When I had the police visit to tell me that Chloe had grown her angel wings I was alone with Millie (Policeman rang OH) and I have felt alone ever since.

I felt it especially hard because Chloe and my dad were very close especially when she was a little girl. Rightly or wrongly she was very much his "favourite", I still cannot accept that they didn't themselves throw themselves into a taxi to spend time with me that day.

I just hold such pain in my heart that everyone who should have been there for me abandoned me in my most helpless time. All over money? It just reinforces that old adage "money is the root of all evil". Yes my Dad has been a frugal man, he has worked hard for what he has. Im not even sure it is that much, I know they own their own home. I can reassure anyone that having seen Chloe, in all her "goneness" cold and alone within her satin lined resting place there is nowhere for anyone to "take it with them". Jostling with this hurt, now resurrected because of their physical needs, is the years old memories of a miserable upbringing, treading on eggshells in fear of the silence that would ensue if anyone displeased him. To this day I harbour fears of silence, hence why the TV or radio is always on regardless of whether anyone is watching or listening. These feelings have all just come at once and I can't shake off the hurt no matter how hard I try and justify it.

For now I think I will just carry on as I have. Lip biting, nodding and winking and being there for my mum. Some bridges are irrepairable and I imagine this to be so with my sister. A day will come though in the not too distant future when we will have to be united in sorting out things. I do not look forward to that.

It has helped me so much letting rip at the keyboard, fingers working quicker than my brain, I know I was safe to post on here, that none of you were quick to judge, but that I would be lucky to hear your own views and unbiased feelings towards a situation I am unable to find clarity with.

Thank you all so much, you're all lovely x

Best_price

Dr.Who-Who

oh MAG, I am giving you visual hugs xox . I would have been there for you if I live closer to you. I would have visited you at least once a week to keep you company until you get bored of me :A

Maybe all of us ( who ever are available) should meet up somewhere & have dinner together.

Time to go now off to sada & home bargain to get fresh stuff for DD1 then we are driving up to York.


Hug, Hug to you MAG. x

CouponWoman

MAGS

Go with your heart hun, and then you can't go wrong. ((((hugs))))


CWxx

Best_price

New APG system

Requires barcode inputting

chattmum

Morning all

Postie just been. Thank you Aesop x x x x

Mags sending as many hugs as I can your way hon I don't really know what to say re your situation i am fortunate that as much as my parents drive me mad I know they would be there in a heart beat for me. I am a big believer in the "life is too short" theory tho I know something's shouldn't/can't be truly forgiven but to hold a permanent grudge(not quite the right word) is hard work and can wear you out and upset you more than trying to get on with life. I guess you need to figure out when the enevitable happens to your mum would u be full of what ifs and if she does go first that will leave you more new decisions re your dad.

I really hope you work thru this, my thoughts and prayers are with you and yours. Just keep remembering that fab little grandson on the way soon. Someone you can love hug kiss and get the same in return from totally unconditionally.

CM

chattmum

Best_price wrote: »

New APG system

Requires barcode inputting

Hmmmm iPod app is still old system and no update wonder how that will affect things guess going to be easier to input anyway

CM

chattmum

Looks like tonnes of stuff coming up n/a on apg so be careful guys people reporting cleaning and cereal items coming up n/a . Bug in system maybe or sada way of stoping the apgs til they can proper fix maybe

chattmum

Haircare pears and ambrosia rice also not comparing and baby stuff

Oh dear