when you reach breaking point

Pee

threemuttleys wrote: »

Its really not worth having any money thrown at it, the work is likely to cost in the region of £400, and in the mechanics opinion, it is not safe to drive (:eek:) Its a 13 year old Volvo, that we bought for £800 about two years ago. Other than new tyres and servicing, we havent needed to do anything else to it.

I am the same, with clothes. I wear skanky old jeans, and random bag lady t shirts around the house, god only knows what the OH thinks sometimes :rotfl:

Sorry about the car. Hope the new tyres can be saved. (Sounds like you had your moneys worth from it, too, so .)

savingqueen

craigywv wrote: »

i read your post in awe at it could have been me you were writing about everything except i only have 1 child a 9 yr old boy. stunned to be honest....i count my blessings i have what i have and when i do wander or see other people have nicer things i just think ...i wonder if their as happy as me. chin up and keep plodding on xxx:)

Thanks craigywv - I will keep on plodding What's that saying, it's the journey that counts, not the destination.

It really helps to know other people in the same boat and you're not alone. I have a few decent friends but most (or maybe all of theml) don't really understand where I'm at, where I'm coming from and where I'm going - if that makes any sense at all - well done! They are still special to me though and bring lots of support & laughter to my life.

Sending lots of positive thoughts and huge smiley smiles your way
sq:)

savingqueen

threemuttleys - sorry to hear about your car - yes I think you should scream - always helps!:eek::eek: :eek::eek::eek::eek::eek::eek::eek: see!

threemuttleys wrote: »

Its really not worth having any money thrown at it, the work is likely to cost in the region of £400, and in the mechanics opinion, it is not safe to drive (:eek:) Its a 13 year old Volvo, that we bought for £800 about two years ago. Other than new tyres and servicing, we havent needed to do anything else to it.

I am the same, with clothes. I wear skanky old jeans, and random bag lady t shirts around the house, god only knows what the OH thinks sometimes :rotfl:

savingqueen

chirpychick wrote: »

You guys are brilliant, the ink thing is a great idea. I'm going to go get some thread tomorrow and I will let you know how I get on with hubby's trousers

I think I will have a sort out and keep the holey ones of mine to one side and non holey ones to the other so i have some for wearing out "in public" and some for housework/dog walking etc.

thank you again

I remember pre IVA days where I used to easily spend £100-£200 a month on clothes :-O I did work full time then but even so! Now I don't even spend that in a year. Sometimes I look at others my age and admire how "trendy" they are and things but my priorities are so different, I usually get hand me downs from my MIL who is 50 years older than me LOL but like this weekend she gave me 3 long jumpers and 2 t shirts, none have ever been worn. She is terrible really, she orders from catalogues and then can't be bothered to return them when they don't suit or fit her! She is about 2 sizes bigger than me but as I am pregnant the jumpers will be perfect in a few weeks time with leggings when the weather drops in temperature. And to be honest even when not pregnant, with a few extra layers underneath they'll be fine.
I do sometimes feel bad for my poor hubby too lol but he understands and i think in some ways admires me for the complete turn around.
He even cuts my hair, except for once a year when I have to go and get it thinned out (which I am currently desperate for as all the elastics are breaking)!
I think he gets more clothes than I do, all his work polos are free thank goodness and steel toe cap shoes are free upto £25 but sometimes he will pay £10 toward them (which is still cheaper than buying new). His mum is wonderful, every birthday she will give me £50 - £100 and I have to go out and buy him new socks, pants, trousers & T shirts, jumpers, coat anything that he needs and then she wraps them up for him LOL. But it's actually a massive help and although he would prefer the money he would only flitter it away.

And I used to feel like I needed to wear make up everyday but now psoriasis stops me from being able to wear anything around my eyes and if I get a spot I might cover it up or apply a little blush on a particularly pale day if I am going out or something but generally I don't bother anymore either.

Sometimes it feels like letting myself go but actually I feel like I wish everyone felt that make up everyday was unnecessary. I see one young lady a couple of years younger than me and she is beautiful but when she puts all her make up on she really looks awful! I wish she saw what everyone else see's. I am not saying I have a huge amount of confidence but more an attitude of "if you don't like it then don't look" LOL :rotfl:

Sorry I got a bit carried away chatting there! You lot are such a lovely bunch I feel like I have just sat down in the living room with a cuppa and chatting to old friends

[QUOTE=threemuttleys;55488305]
I am the same, with clothes. I wear skanky old jeans, and random bag lady t shirts around the house, god only knows what the OH thinks sometimes :rotfl:[/QUOTE]

love your attitude chirpy chick "if they don't like it then don't look" - one I'm trying to cultivate myself

I'm another nearly full-time scruff bag (not that you're all scruff bags... puts plates of meat right in it :rotfl:.) I mostly feel more comfortable - physically and emotionally in the casual-scruffbag look - could be the start of a new trend :cool: . Occasionally I feel the urge to smarten up but it doesn't last long - though on rare nights out I love dolling myself up a bit, digging out my sole pair of evening trousers and a new top (from charity shop of course), bit of bling and slap on and bob's your uncle. Probably because I don't bother as much usually, I feel a bit of a glamour puss in comparision. Lots of women in the part of Essex I live look 100 x more - well just more - going to the supermarket than I do on an evening out :rotfl:.

I still wear a bit of make-up but have been downgrading and hardly wearing any in the hot weather and toying with idea of giving up eventually but not sure I want to yet. I'm experimenting with not dyeing my hair (after dyeing it for 25 years), have some pretty impressive dark roots but these are delicately highlighted with low-lights (ok grey hairs but same effect surely and completely free!)

I think I would like to make the most of my natural self - not worry about the 'groomed' look but have a healthier lifestyle so my figure, skin etc look their best and experiment more to find more flattering clothes in terms of colour, cut etc and use more accessories to jazz things up and express myself. Listen to me!

excuse the rambling - coming out of lurkdom, finding my voice and in the midst of trying to find my middle-aged self I think!

sq:)

monnagran

saving queen: Honestly, my life was just like that when I was younger but take heart. When you look back on your life, you, and your children, won't remember the hardships you will all just remember the fun, the love, and feeling of togetherness. In fact your children will probably not realise that there were hardships.
This doesn't help you now but I promise that in years to come you will actually be glad that you went through some tough times. You may also find out that some of your 'luckier' friends are envying you your family and your way of life. I know, you'll think that is ridiculous, but trust me - I know.

three muttleys: EEEk! What a nightmare. One thing I will say is that sometimes the component parts of your car may be worth more than the car itself. It's worth finding out what you would get for say, the wheels, exhaust system etc. My DS did this with an obsolete motor bike he had. He got 4 times what it was worth by selling parts separately on Ebay. Good luck, fingers crossed for you.

maryb: My father never stopped telling the story of how I had some white canvas-type shoes when I was young, and they had worn out at the sides and my little toes poked through. I think I was a student at the time. He caught me painting the shoes with white shoe paint and then painting my little toes so they were the same colour. He was horrified and offered to lend me the money to buy new shoes, but proud, independent, prickly little madam that I was I refused and went on painting my sticking-out toes.

I've just had my last appointment at the dentist. I had a wisdom tooth out about 6 weeks ago and today had the tooth next to it sorted out where the wisdom tooth had damaged it. I've moaned about the dental insurance I pay every month and often thought I'd stop it as I hadn't had a tooth out for nearly 50 years and had only had the odd filling done since then. Am I glad I didn't. I must have saved hundreds of pounds in the last couple of months.
My grandmother had all her teeth out when her 5 boys were quite young and she was raising them alone. Because the anaesthetic cost 6d extra she refused it and had them all out without any help at all. Then she walked home and cooked lunch for her children. They don't breed them like that any more.

Thank goodness they don't have to. Thinking about that stops me moaning - at least for a bit.

katieowl_2

monnagran wrote: »

My grandmother had all her teeth out when her 5 boys were quite young and she was raising them alone. Because the anaesthetic cost 6d extra she refused it and had them all out without any help at all. Then she walked home and cooked lunch for her children. They don't breed them like that any more.

Thank goodness they don't have to. Thinking about that stops me moaning - at least for a bit.

Mind you if she'd had five kids in those days - without any pain relief - having your teeth out was probably over pretty quick by comparison :rotfl:

Kate

savingqueen

monnagran wrote: »

saving queen: Honestly, my life was just like that when I was younger but take heart. When you look back on your life, you, and your children, won't remember the hardships you will all just remember the fun, the love, and feeling of togetherness. In fact your children will probably not realise that there were hardships.
This doesn't help you now but I promise that in years to come you will actually be glad that you went through some tough times. You may also find out that some of your 'luckier' friends are envying you your family and your way of life. I know, you'll think that is ridiculous, but trust me - I know.

I've just had my last appointment at the dentist. I had a wisdom tooth out about 6 weeks ago and today had the tooth next to it sorted out where the wisdom tooth had damaged it. I've moaned about the dental insurance I pay every month and often thought I'd stop it as I hadn't had a tooth out for nearly 50 years and had only had the odd filling done since then. Am I glad I didn't. I must have saved hundreds of pounds in the last couple of months.
My grandmother had all her teeth out when her 5 boys were quite young and she was raising them alone. Because the anaesthetic cost 6d extra she refused it and had them all out without any help at all. Then she walked home and cooked lunch for her children. They don't breed them like that any more.

Thank goodness they don't have to. Thinking about that stops me moaning - at least for a bit.

monnagran - thank you so much for your kind words. I know deep down what you say is true & my children already sometimes say things to reflect that. I just need reminding sometimes, thank you again.

re: your teeth, yes good job you kept up your insurance. Recently I made the decision to have a tooth removed rather than have a few hundred pounds worth of treatment I couldn't justfy spending. Fate was on my side though because the dentist said afterwards, the tooth was beyond saving so had saved myself physical as well as financial pain. I still feel the gap it's left every day though and I don't like it there.

Hope your tooth's ok now. Your grandmother's story sent shivers down my spine! What a woman!

sq:)

Beccatje

Dutch government has just raised VAT from 19% to 21%.
It scares me to death.

I will avoid buying new stuff with a vengeance. It will be thrift stores from here on out.
More and more people will stop spending because they just haven't got the money to spend.
So the government won't get as much money from the raised taxes as they expected and the budget will be off again....

It seems like a never ending circle.

GreyQueen

Beccatje wrote: »

Dutch government has just raised VAT from 19% to 21%.
It scares me to death.

I will avoid buying new stuff with a vengeance. It will be thrift stores from here on out.
More and more people will stop spending because they just haven't got the money to spend.
So the government won't get as much money from the raised taxes as they expected and the budget will be off again....

It seems like a never ending circle.

:eek: That's bad news. Ours is 20%. Do you have things exempted from it such as here in the UK like food and childrens' clothes or is it on everything?

Beccatje

GreyQueen wrote: »

:eek: That's bad news. Ours is 20%. Do you have things exempted from it such as here in the UK like food and childrens' clothes or is it on everything?

Food is exempt. That stays at the low rate of 6% for now. Everything else is fair game.