Don't know what to do- lost my dad

Savvy_Sue

OP, I am sorry for your loss. Be kind to yourself, as far as you can.

Just thinking: I believe you CAN challenge a will if you were being supported by the deceased. I'd say from your first post that you probably were being supported by him, unless what you were paying for board was roughly 'the going rate' for a room in a shared house in your area.

This is not something to do lightly. Have you actually seen the will yet?

getmore4less

It;s a tough time loosing a parent lost both of mine in less than 10months

take time and don't rush into anything like moving out, might be worth spending some time away maybe with sis or even mum.

All of you will be effected by the loss so be prepared for emotions.


Does your mum have a new relationship?


I am inclned to agree that the change of will may have been while not of sound mind, think back had he been going to the doctors maybe he had been talking to mum about it before you were told. Also if he had not let go he might have been easy to manipulate.

You also have potential rights as a dependant if you were being subsidised,, that may depend on unknowns you prefer not to talk about which is OK but does mean you need to get some independant views on the situation. Does you mum know about your full situation.

valk_scot

Have you actually sat down with your mother and sister and had a straight three-way talk about this? If she's already told you that she intends to sell the house as soon as probate is granted and split the money three ways then that's not at all unreasonable. In fact it's more than generous given she's been left everything tbh. If you think tempers may be lost then include your uncle as well.

If you do make satisfactory progress over agreeing future division the four of you should make a list (four copies) and then the three of you sign it to say you agree, with your uncle's signature as witness. This will not have the same force in law as drawing an agreement up with a solicitor of course and it may be difficult to hold her to it but it would be worth doing, it would mean that six months time down the line there would be no "forgetting" as to what was agreed, from any of you.

If there is other money and assets they could be shared out as soon the executor releases them. To make absolutely sure, your mother is sole executor, yes? Sometimes a solicitor is named as second executor.

If i were you I'd start getting my financial balls in a line though. Start looking for alternative accomodation that you can move out to swiftly and without fuss if necessary. Don't be in too much of a hurry to go
though, you actually being a sitting tenant is a good lever as she'd have to evict you before selling the house. It would be worth thinking about starting to get it as clean and tidy as possible if it's to go on the market and that's best done with you in it, though you may want to move out before the showing, a completely clear house usually sells faster. These last suggestions are only worth doing though once you're confident (proper legal agreement?) that you'll get your share. Don't do all the work and then move out only to find your mother intends to keep the lot. Incidentally if you had a proper rental agreement with your dad it would be best to keep paying rent to your mum till this is sorted out. It makes your position as a sitting tenant more secure.

In the end though you're 30-ish, no dependants, have a job and can support yourself. If you don't recieve a penny of your father's money it will be unfortunate but it won't be disastrous for you tbh, you won't be living in a box on the streets. As for your sister she's going to have to make a few plans of her own, it's never wise to run up debts at any time let alone in the expectation of a legacy she might not get.

Final word. Your mum has another partner, yes? Married? Think about what might happen if she dies before your father's estate is wound up. Even if she's being 100% sincere and cooperative about divvying your father's estate up three ways if she dies half way through the process with no new will her OH will have a good claim, in fact he'll inherit the lot if they're married. you got into this position because of one will that didn't favour you, try not to let the same thing happen again.