So bl**dy peed off...BRIDEZILLA ALERT!!!

jenhug

we had lots do this, family members and god parents. Lost a fortune on the day, but the photographer ended up with a 3 course meal too!

Crowdpleaser

Id be thrilled to be upgraded too! Wouldnt find it in the least disrespectful!!! xxx

Silaqui

ali-t wrote: »

I would be really angry if someone had invited me to their evening reception and then with 2 days to go expected me to fill in, take a days annual leave or unpaid leave from work to go to their wedding for the whole day.

Just swallow the loss and don't antagonise the friends you have inviting for the evening by 'bumping them up' which I find disrespectful. If you didn't want me there all day to begin with, I wouldn't feel valued to be herded into a full day place just to save you money.

Sometimes it's not that you didn't want them there, it's that you had to make hard decision due to numbers/budgetary restrictions.
I have 6 good friends who I REALLY wanted to invite to the day - they were on the original list. However, as my OH has a really big family, it soon became apparent that we would have to restrict the daytime to family only (and even then, some partners weren't able to be invited).
When some of his family let us down after meals etc had been finalised, I just rang them and asked them if they fancied making a day of it and coming a bit earlier. 4 could, 2 couldn't, I wouldn't have made them feel bad about it!

The chances are the people you 'bump' are pretty close friends anyway - so just be honest with them! I just said to them, originally it was going to be family only but some have let us down so now I have room to invite the people I really want, if you fancy it!

x

wxy

Awww I'm sorry to hear that! The same thing happened to us when we received a letter in the post from a couple 2 days before the wedding to say that they couldn't make it any more so I had to bump up some evening guests (which was hard at such late notice) and mess with table plans again. Completely understand how you feel and I hope you can bump people up.

If it helps the people we bumped up were not offended at all but very pleased to be a part of the day too. Good luck.

mildred1978

Stephb1986 wrote: »

I've already said to my OH that if people don't turn up on the day that we will never speak to them again as we can only have a max of 60 guests to the wedding breakfast we're having to really pick carefully and there are other people we can put in the spaces.

Steph xx

What a lovely attitude. One of my friends was rushed into hospital with an ectopic pregnancy in the early hours of our wedding day.

Strangely, her boyfriend wanted to stay in the hospital with her.

Clearly they did it just to p1ss us off, and we should never speak to them again.

I had to drop out of the wedding of a friend of my husband. (before we were wed) when my best friend ended up seriously ill in hospital after a car accident in my car a few hundred miles away. The couple getting married weren't offended that I wasn't there, as humans they understood what was important.

RainbowDrops

I realize that some things can come up last minute, but it's pretty rude to give short notice - most people must understand that this late in the day things will have been paid for already.
But what can you do?

We had drop outs on the day for health reasons, and swallowed that. But I would have been pretty miffed if it was for the same reason as OP.

As a guest, if I've committed to go to a wedding, I wouldn't even consider booking a holiday after RSVPing. I know holidays are important to people, but if that was their priority, then they shouldn't have said yes in the first place.

scarlet1985

Thanks for your replies it feels better to be able to rant!

I didn't mean it offensively to say "bump people up" its just I am clearly annoyed and upset right now and felt I could come and vent on here without being judged to be honest.

Anyway to add my misery/rant I've literally just had a text (at Midnight!) to say that one of OH's friends from school who is a doctor didn't book the day off "as he normally doesn't work Fridays!" but has been rota'd on to be on call - and so because he won't be able to relax he won't be attending. Why Thanks very bl**dy much.:mad:

It just really annoys me as I have put so much hard work into this wedding and it upsets me that people don't feel that my wedding is important. I know its not their wedding but its important to me :-(

I'm so stressed out I wish we had just gone on our own somewhere no stress :-(

Thanks again for letting me rant. Its really nice that I can vent some of my anger even if its just through a keyboard.

sweetilemon

Awww scarlet I really feel for you. I know what you mean, its just furstrating when people don't realise what it means to you and flipently cancel. How many guests are you having? Wheres your wedding...i.e. hotel, church...not that it makes any difference im just being nosey!

Tiara_2

I am absolutely dreading ppl dropping out at the last minute. Of course sometimes life gets in the way and things happen that make not being able to attend unavoidable- I would completely understand if someone was poorly for example. Not booking the day off work though is harder to take. And I don't begrude the couple their holiday but surely they should have sorted out what dates they were going before deciding whether to accept the invite!
Just try not to let it get to you and spoil your run up to your big day- you will still have an amazing time

EllieBelly1

Oh I totally understand, i would be fuming!! We are getting married next Fri and I have had one person who said they couldn't come phone up my Mum and say that they will be attending the ceremony with a friend! The ceremony was the bit we were tight on numbers and we filled her spot so we just don't have the room, Mum told her it was fine so now I have to grovel with the venue to see if they can squeeze in 2 more people!!