Friend Dilemma

jayII

Molly41 wrote: »

Well today is my birthday and thank you for all the Happy B'Days:T

So opened the package and it was not a ticking time-bomb as my husband suggested. She had sent me a very strange gift - well I thought it was strange - but I suppose in some respects it shows how she does not really know me. I always spend a long time finding the right thing for her.

Anyway she sent me a piggy keyring and a piggy soft toy and some herbal teas. The pigs are apparently a sign of good luck in Germany and when I was 14 I did collect them for a couple of years. My nickname was Piggy then (for obvious reasons) and I kind of adopted pigs in a bid to reconcile myself to that nick name. However in reality I hated it very much. The herbal teas? Yuk would have loved some German chocolate, as usually given. I think this is response to a problem I am having with eating atm.

She did also tell me when she would be In England next (over bank holiday). I would like to see her but I just dont know. Dont really know what to think tbh?

I'm going to be horrible again, but I feel very cynical about her motives.

Did she also send a deeply aplogetic letter, explaining that she was in a bad space the last time you talked and said things she later regretted, or a wimilar explanation for the way she treated you?

If she did not, then I suspect the parcel is purely about the fact that you have taken control of the situation, and she doesn't like it. She has sent you things that remind you that she knew you 'way back when' and of how long you have been friends. It's like saying 'don't throw it all away, look how much I mean to you'. She is trying to press the buttons of reminiscence.

Other than that I really wouldn't read to much into the contents of the parcel. As you have said, she obviously doesn't know you at all. I would just have a long think about what the friendship has brought you in recent years and if rekindling it is likely to bring you anything but heartache. Be very honest with yourself.

Sorry, but she really doesn't sound like a very nice person, and you are worth so much more. There are lots of really nice potential friends out there! If you do want to stay in touch, then take care to keep it at a very light level, so she can't hurt you again.

Good luck and a belated Happy Birthday. :T

Molly41

Again Jay - you have summed up how I feel. I am very edgy about her motives. No there was no apology - but then she has never apologised in her life to me!

Im inclining to not see her over bank holiday. Actually i have a full week of hospital appointments so it wont be viable really.

Mrs.W_2

However you decide to go forward from this point, I sincerely hope the decision ends the stress and emotional mess this 'friend' causes for you.

And a belated Happy Birthday to you, Molly! Many happy returns.