working away from home

piglet74

anyone else have an OH who works away from home most of the time,

we live in Ireland, but my husband works in England, Scotland and Wales, most of the time, usually away for 2 weeks at a time, and when he is home, he is working nights, i work days, result being we see little to nothing of each other.

maybe having 3 proper days together since xmas :mad: and $ex twice this year

i know there is no real alternative at the mo, like we both get so fed up at times, but him jacking his job in is not the answer, car loan, house, bills, etc...live on the dole is not an option, but i am so fed up with never seeing him, and on the odd day i do see him, its half hour maybe

how does anyone else cope with having to keep their marriage going over the fone, or with snatched hello and goodbye in a car park, when really you are so mad at times and miss them so much, its easier not to talk to them at all :mad:

rant over

balletshoes

My OH also works away, but we have longer together when we are together ie at least 4 or 5 days every month or 2. I take annual leave from work and he does too. Thats how we make it work. Our kind of relationship is not for everyone, thats for sure!

lostinrates

We have been in a work away situation for a few years now. For us it works well most of the time BUT, we have worked around it too. E.g. For us the routine worked because at first i did not work, so was avaialable when he was, and now i work ina way that fits reasonably well around us in a self employed way.

Tropez

My partner is on a one year contract in New Zealand with about two thirds left to run. Skype video calls is all the contact we have right now.

I've found just keeping busy is pretty much all I can do, otherwise I feel quite lonely and mopey.

beanymagoo

My husband used to work away monday to friday and it was pretty akward when we wanted to start a family as we were never together at the right time! Because my Husband was put up in nice hotels I used to take a few days off work whenever I could and go and stay with him. I didnt see him during the day because of work but that left me free time to go and explore the area and then we would always catch up in the evening over a nice dinner. We lived like this for several years before my Husband got another job and now he works from home which drives me nuts as well lol!

gingin_2

beanymagoo wrote: »

My husband used to work away monday to friday and it was pretty akward when we wanted to start a family as we were never together at the right time!

That was the same for us. My beautiful, sweet, gentle daughter has the less than glamorous conception place of the Halifax Travelodge

Ours is not as extreme as the OP but I quite like the time alone and then I like the meeting up at the end of the week. I feel we have a healthier relationship because of it but know no different.

If it affected us emotionally/ sexually I would question whether it was worth it. Is there no way you can sell up and move somewhere more equidistant, or is it just not possible. When our children were little I did just move around with OH wherever the work was, until the kids started school and needed stability.

Skintski

My H2B works away quite a bit and is currently in Brazil. Thank god for the internet is all I can say because with phone charges the way they are, we wouldn't be able to talk. He tends to be away for 7-10 days at a time and I just plough myself into work. I find myself quite angry sometimes that we miss doing things together but it doesn't stop me loving him so I always soften when I know he is due to return home. Distractions are the way forward, I don't allow myself to think about how many days he has been gone or how many there are until he comes back, I only think about the present as I find that helps me feel more normal.

piglet74

thanks every one

i just feel sometimes.....is it only me, cause it feels like it is only me that lives like this, tho i know its not.

i do miss him, and i feel like its making us drift apart,

selling up and moving is not an option, he works all over the place, we live in Ireland, he works all over the UK, N Ireland and ROI.

it is impossible to make plans, or get a night out, or even a night in

i just have to make the most of things i suppose, i do throw myself into work when he is away, and i tend to work 7 days a week when is is gone.

tho i find myself not wanting to speak to him on the phone because i miss him so much and sometimes (a lot of the time) he is literally only just home and its time to go away again

i know all the sayings "at least is he working" or a really popular one in Ireland at the mo "you have to go where the work is...cause there is none here", but it is not making it any easier,

CH27

Could you both book a long weekend off every month & turn the phones etc off?

lisawood78

Mine lives/works in south Germany 5 days a week every week, has done for 6 years. Feel for you op

piglet74

CH27 wrote: »

Could you both book a long weekend off every month & turn the phones etc off?

i wish! not every month, last time he got off for a weekend was for our wedding anniversary, (11 weeks ago)