Clubs for children. Necessary?

jellyhead

Is there a club at school that he could go to after school? Maybe he'd be more comfortable with teachers he already knows (who I presume would have gentler ways of telling him to shut up).

Mine is nearly 7 and when he tried boys brigade he hated it - it was the shouting and general chaos that he didn't like. He has gone to a few after school clubs recently, but not until he turned 6.

Mine goes to gymnastics. He isn't sporty and doesn't have much stamina. He has no interest in football or any team games - I think they stress him because he's so clumsy. At gymnastics they run around playing stuck in the mud for a warm-up, which he loves. Everything else they do in a space on their own, so they don't need to be told off, and other children won't shout at them if they are rubbish at it.

dizsiebubba

As a Brownie leader (female equiv) I would urge you not to force him to go back...the adults who run the units are volunteers and give up their time for free as they enjoy doing so. Personally I struggle when kids are 'forced' to come as it is less enjoyable for me when they moan/sulk/cry/refuse to join in all of the time and I end up thinking 'why do I bother?' especially when they are taking up the space of a girl who really would like to come.

I hope that didn't sound too harsh...was just being honest x

whitewing

I never liked clubs, but I do like learning. Maybe day courses would be better for him because they are finite.

jackyann

He is bright, and he's had a tough couple of years. Could he manage a conversation around these lines?
I know that what really interests you is x...y...z... and I love how well you can do....x....y....z - but you know that everyone needs to get exercise and fresh air....so I'm wondering how you could do that? Talk either about something that interests him, or something he is willing to try.
Be very clear if say, you can't afford sailing / horse riding, or if swimming is difficult to get to.

What I would put on the cards if you can is any local wildlife trusts & centres that have clubs as children can get absorbed in things that interest them, then look things up on computers etc. without getting sporty or competitive. Woodcraft Folk sometimes suit slightly "different children" rather than Scouts, but their availability is patchy. look on their website for local groups.

I would also agree that day & taster courses can be very useful if you can afford them (they are often cheap)

Spendless

Have you had a look on your council's website to see what they are running in the school holidays? That would give you small 'taster' sessions to see where his interests lie for a small charge if any.

When the new school year starts, you could see what school offers, again it's likely to be minimal or no charge. Mine have done tae kwon do, gymnastics,cheerleading, street dance, art and crafts clubs via school.

For my son, beavers, cubs, scouts was the best thing for him as it embraced many different activities such as ten pin bowling tournaments and swimming galas, as well as things like kayaking, overnight trips and camps and working on various badges. They also worked on his 'boisterous' traits and turned them into leadership qualities and I'm sorry mine gave it up earlier this year, but if your son has tried it and disliked it then I wouldn't push the issue for now.

Janepig

He sounds a bit like my friend's little boy (DS's best friend) with his self-confidence - if he gets the slightest setback he loses all confidence in his abilities and digs his heels in then and won't participate at all. His mother brings him to football, which more often than not ends up with her dragging him there - it's quite funny if he's naughty and she tells him "right, you're not going to football now" which he's then chuffed about! We were at a tournament on the weekend and he literally had to be dragged onto the pitch so there were enough on DS's team to play, with the promise he only had to stand in goal, and when a goal went in he promptly walked off and came and sat by me pouting, saying he was rubbish. It was only when I got up and said I'd stand in goal instead that he rushed back over . It was quite sweet though when he did manage to save a goal to see DS patting him on the back and telling him well done.

Maybe, as JH has suggested, gymnastics might be something to try. There's lots of boys at our local gym club, DS goes most Saturdays and even his friend (above) seems to enjoy it, although he doesn't like it when DS isn't there. But it's not a competitive environment, just some fun and exercise. As good as DS is at footie, he's not very good at gymnastics, well tumbling anyway, but he enjoys it nonetheless.

Jx

JustKeepSwimming_2

My DS 9 has always been a bit of a loner - he seems to prefer his own company & doesn't have many friends although that doesn't appear to bother him. He'd be in heaven if I left him alone to play lego/dragons/draw/play on Wii & just fed him ever now & then...

I was a bit worried that he wasn't being "social" enough so after a bit of persuading he joined our local library bookclub for 8-11 year olds - & he loves it far more than he thought he would. Do your library run similar groups? Ours is only every month so there isn't too much pressure on him, & we go to the library evey week anyway.

My DS also started tae kwan do 4 months ago which is going well. Sadly for him he has inherited my lack of coordination, but he is still enthusiastic & does practice his moves. I would never have thought he'd enjoy it so much as he isn't one for "joining in" usually, but he does at these sessions as there appears to be a lot of working with different group members.

I think both have helped my DS a lot - he does seem more confident & happy to speak up (although kids do change the moment your back is turned!).

jellyhead

Spendless wrote: »

Have you had a look on your council's website to see what they are running in the school holidays? That would give you small 'taster' sessions to see where his interests lie for a small charge if any.

Ooooh yes, our council hasn't produced the booklet yet (it's online but they also do a paper one) but it always includes gymnastics and trampolining and you could just pay for one session to see if he liked it.

Nobody ever knows about these sessions except for the kids who already use the leisure centre (the paper booklet is available there).

kj*daisy

My DS hated beavers, wouldn't join in any clubs I took him too - so I didn't push it, he did some after school activities but no organised clubs, a lot of parents seemed to love all the running around and competing with how busy their kids are, I just hated all that.

He then joined scouts at 10 which he does love - but I think it's just because I let him be and didn't push when he didn't want to do stuff. He also started to play a musical instrument at school when he was your DS's age and then joined a band which he does enjoy. There's a lot of pressure for kids to do clubs but if they don't want to do stuff, why force them. If your DS is creative and makes stuff as well as loving the computer, then encourage his arty side. Maybe get him learning an instrument so he can eventually play music with other people who also love music.

Dunroamin

jackyann wrote: »

What I would put on the cards if you can is any local wildlife trusts & centres that have clubs as children can get absorbed in things that interest them, then look things up on computers etc. without getting sporty or competitive. Woodcraft Folk sometimes suit slightly "different children" rather than Scouts, but their availability is patchy. look on their website for local groups.

)

You beat me to the suggestion of Woodcraft Folk.

http://www.woodcraft.org.uk/