Real life MMD: Are my parents dividing the will fairly?

milvusvestal

Keep well out of it, and don't try to influence your parents' wishes.

Besides, what happens if your father predeceases your mother? I assume he's left everything to her (and vice-versa) otherwise she as the survivor can contest the will as his widow and rightful dependant. And, if that is the case, there is nothing to stop her leaving the money to whomsoever she pleases.

This is a situation where your parents would be very well advised to seek professional advice and have their wills professionally drawn by a competent solicitor who has a wealth of practical experience in will-making and dealing with estates. As an ex-professional executor, I can see a number of problems that will arise if your parents are not previously made aware of the consequences of their actions.

Ultimately, the decision as to the disposal of their estates is theirs, but it would be a great shame if they make wills without having first of all sought the advice of an independent solicitor, who can guide them to an acceptable result.

Mrs_B_2011

I am in a similar situation, I have two step grown up step children, my husband and I have written wills. I put a sizeable chunk of money down on our house (from my divorce settlement) which will go to my son first everything else will then be split 3 ways. The mother of my step children has a house which I'm guessing she will leave to them. It's very difficult, not a subject people like talking about. I'd probably say keep out of it - good luck!

dave2

Firstly I'm in full agreement that it's their will, you'd be best to keep out.

However, I were talking to a good friend who was in your dad's position, I really think it would depend on the relationships.

If I assume your dad left his previous family and now lives with your family, I would assume the default position would be exactly as you've described. Parents split the assets between them and then they each divide equally between their own kids.

On the other hand, if your dad's first wife had died and then your mum brought up his kids I suspect what would feel right would be different.

Another possibility is if your dad was very wealthy and your mum not. I could probably sympathise with the other kids' feeling like you were effectively getting a double helping of the father's estate. This seems a bit unlikely though since presumably estates would have been split on the original divorce.

busman100

I agree with most of the messages already sent, it is your parents money, and IT IS THEIR CHOICE.

My late wife and I solved this problem by making identical wills and any money left in the estate would be equally split between all the grand children. I have two grand children my wife has seven, plus there is one other who is the daughter of my wife's former daughter in law. they will all be treated the same ie: one tenth of the eatate each.

ElizabethBart

Well, firstly I suppose it is totally up to your parents what they do with their money but their decision seems fair to me. Why would your mother want to leave any portion of what should be her inheritance to children from another marriage. To make it equal would mean the mother of the first marriage leaves a quarter of her money to you.

flashback4

What people must remember is that it is not their god given right to inherit their parents money.
I have three sisters and two brothers.
When my father died he left everything to my mother.
When my mother died she left everything including a four bedroom house, to one of my sisters.
The rest of us thought we had done something wrong in our mothers eyes to be shunned in this way, but for whatever reason she chose to do what she did, it was her choice.

ronangel

My father and his brother did not speak for over 20 years due to my grandfather giving a larger share to my fathers brother. when I was a young child we used to have to cross the street if we saw his brother coming.
I understand the reasons now as my father would not have wanted to run the business just work and go home on time at end of the day & grandfather was probably right in his decision. My mother after seeing all the family trouble this caused left everything equally to my brother and myself with a choice if one wanted an item could pay other value of it or if not in agreement sell and split money. This is the best way equal shares or chance of family troubles or breakup in the future, which is not worth it. I never spoke to my uncle for the rest of my life & only his wife after my fathers and his death.

glad2bmad

if people are going to bicker about it.
spend the bloody lot before you go:A and have a dammed good time doing it:beer:

lynnejk

Think it is up to your parents to decide. If they make a will they may be advised to leave all the assets to the survivor when the first passes on. The survivor may well later totally rewrite the will to their own tune then. This happened with my parents - they decided together and then my mother totally changed it when left on her own.

Runningwomble

It's not your money nor that of your (step) siblings. Show that you're not greedy and offer to share your inheritance with them on that sad day day that it becomes a real issue. Or give it all to charity. You're not losing anything, simply not gaining anything either.