Paternity leave - how did your employer react?

onlyroz

When my husband asked for extended paternity leave, the HR department laughed in his face and told him "not until it's the men that have the babies".

However, this was before the law changed regarding men taking up the unused maternity leave of their wives - and I don't know so far of any men that have taken up this entitlement. I also would be interested if anyone on here has done this.

Gra76

Paternity leave shouldn't play any part in a decision taken for future pay rises and promotions.

With each of my 3 kids I took 2 weeks paternity leave and it didn't cause any issues. As long as you book it well in advance I don't see how they can count it against your OH.

As for extended paternity leave - I was point blank told I couldn't have it as our company is relatively small and they needed me back. I don't see that it would be as much of a problem in a large company.

Gigglepig

Gra76, I was not aware that the employer could refuse the extended paternity leave, or was this before the law changed?

Of course it should not count in future promotions/salary reviews, but we are still concerned that it might do so in practice.

Gordon_Hose

Their reactions should never form part of your decision. Provided your choices are within the rules they can't penalise him for taking extra paternity leave.

You're worrying about something that may never happen.

Gigglepig

I guess everyone has different strategies in life, for us this matters :-)

As a female, I am pretty sure that having a child can and probably will impact my career and pay to some extent, if I keep taking a year off it adds up. For my career it may possibly help if we split childcare 50-50%.

However, for us as a family we don't want to split childcare 50-50% if it is highly likely to impact his career. This is why we are asking about dads' experiences with the additional paternity leave.

Gordon_Hose

What's to say they are going to offer him promotions and pay rises anyway??

Gra76

Gigglepig wrote: »

Gra76, I was not aware that the employer could refuse the extended paternity leave, or was this before the law changed?

I'm not sure when the law changed but I asked for an extra week off (I was quite prepared to take holiday entitlement for this) for my 2 eldest kids who are now coming up to 8yrs and 4yrs old. I was told they couldn't afford to have me off for more than 2 weeks....I didn't see the point in asking if I could have extended time off when the 3rd mini-me arrived just over a year ago!

Gordon_Hose

Any employer can refuse leave if business needs dictate the employee is required to work.

whitewing

I don't know of any men who have taken more than 2 weeks paternity leave.

[Deleted User]

First time round, i took 2 weeks paternity leave, 2 weeks holiday then 'worked from home' for a week. Second time round; different firm.. i did the same but also took a few days unpaid leave.

But.. all through the leave, i would reply to emails and do a little work (you'll find you actually can get a little bored at times when the baby is asleep).

I'm glad I took the time off, as those first 6-8 weeks can be pretty brutal in terms of loss of sleep - plus our first baby cried his face off for hours at a time (he could cry for a good 4 hours in a row... medical reasons) and I was glad to be around to help.

No one in management really minded about the time off