What age would you let a child live in a basement flatlet?

gingin_2

PasturesNew wrote: »

I'd say it's fine .... if you can stop the potential for bad behaviours becoming the norm.... which is the real problem.

Yes. That's my only real worry and with teenage years fast approaching I can't see it getting much better.

martinthebandit

I think I would let him, but I also think I would turn the router off before I went to bed

gingin_2

FatVonD wrote: »

Could you move into the basement room yourself and let him have your room?

I hadn't thought of that. I don't know if safety wise the parents should be at the top of the house where they can hear everything and he has a younger sister who wouldn't like us being down there.

kj*daisy

gingin wrote: »

Thanks, some interesting answers.

The "den" was a concession for DS having the small bedroom and it is mostly his space and I think he's lucky to have it. The only option would be to take all the electronic goodies out of there and give him the bedroom but I think given the choice of den plus *rappy bedroom or nice bedroom with no den he would choose the former, so I guess it stays as it is.

I'd leave it as it is, he has the den for hanging out in, so doesn't need to use his bedroom for that, so it doesn't matter that it's not a big room.

Spendless

I've got a 12yo boy and would be perfectly happy with this set up for mine.

DH says you can turn the internet off - though he doesn't tell me how and I've no idea myself and he's currently watching a film but I' m sure someone else can explain (you could try the Techie board). I'd also expect him to know what to do if the smoke alarm goes off (though he should know that anyway)

Spendless

gingin wrote: »

I hadn't thought of that. I don't know if safety wise the parents should be at the top of the house where they can hear everything and he has a younger sister who wouldn't like us being down there.

How old is younger sister? whilst I'd have no issue with my 12yo sleeping downstairs re my earlier reply, I'd want to be on the same floor as my 9yo daughter because she has a tendancy to throw up and sleeep thru it!! So, I like to be able to hear what she's doing. You know your own kids.

Bogof_Babe

Can't you lock the door into the den at bedtime?

gingin_2

Bogof_Babe wrote: »

Can't you lock the door into the den at bedtime?

Yes, that is a very good point.

gingin_2

Spendless wrote: »

How old is younger sister? whilst I'd have no issue with my 12yo sleeping downstairs re my earlier reply, I'd want to be on the same floor as my 9yo daughter because she has a tendancy to throw up and sleeep thru it!! So, I like to be able to hear what she's doing. You know your own kids.

She's 8 and would definitely want us on the same floor. I am having a relapse of sleeping problems with her at the moment so it wouldn't work.

Brighton_belle

gingin wrote: »

He's at that pre-teen stage where being with the family is not particularly exciting for him and I don't want to give him even more reason to not want to be around.
He loves the computer, it's a neccessary thing to have as a family, it can't be moved to a different room and although the time on it is monitored now, it will be hard to keep an eye on his time on there if he is right next door to it and we are 2 floors above.

These are the two things that I think are really important: families spending time/chilling out in the same physical space is very important and I agree, encouraging that spilt off too young wouldn't be good.
I don't think 12 year olds should have computers and tv's (I appreciate you haven't mentioned any tv) in their bedrooms and the den would be the same virtually as having it in his bedroom if he slept down there.
Not an easy one tough, as the current arrangement does not sound good. How did you decide between your older child having the small room and the yonger one the bigger room? (Not a crit, just wondering, as oldest is likely to want their own space sooner than a younger child)