What's fair rent for working children living at home?

HappyMJ

Person_one wrote: »

Question to those of you who think adult children should be charged 'market rent' or other significant amount, even if on JSA. If your elderly parents moved in with you, would you take a chunk of their state pension off them?

I moved back in with my mum and dad when I lost my job, my relationship and my home within the space of 10 days. They didn't charge me any rent but they did come home to a clean house, a walked dog and tea started while I was unemployed, and then when I got a job I was out again within a few months.

Its wonderful to know you have the security that in hard times you can go home and be welcomed with open arms, and it cuts both ways, if any of my family members or close friends are in trouble they can come to me and always have a place to sleep, there's no way they'd be charged.

It depends on the reason they stayed. I would expect them to offer something and I would accept it. I wouldn't neccessarily ask for the entire state pension just the same amount as I would ask of an adult child at least £40 a week and hand the rest back. They'd do grocery shopping anyway and probably do my house a favour cleaning it thoroughly whilst I was at work so I'd treat them with the money they gave me.

I have stayed with my mother between tenancies and always offered her what I thought would be enough to cover bills and she has accepted the money. There would be an argument if she had refused the money. If I or her was genuinely really broke due to a disaster or something then of course there would be no charge.

Mojisola

Person_one wrote: »

I preferred the feeling of getting the keys to my own home, thanks in no small part to the fact that I could save the majority of my salary each month while living at home.

There's conflicting advice given on these boards, you see young adults regularly being advised to move back in with parents if they want to save a house deposit, then parents being advised to charge their adult children market rent to teach them about 'the real world'!

Does anyone recommend that? The posts mostly seem to be about paying a fair share of the household bills.

Dunroamin

Person_one wrote: »

I moved back in with my mum and dad when I lost my job, my relationship and my home within the space of 10 days. They didn't charge me any rent but they did come home to a clean house, a walked dog and tea started while I was unemployed, and then when I got a job I was out again within a few months.
.

I think that's an excellent thing to do if you're unable to make your full contribution but, if someone was claiming JSA, I would expect the majority to be paid over for keep.

Dunroamin

Person_one wrote: »

I preferred the feeling of getting the keys to my own home, thanks in no small part to the fact that I could save the majority of my salary each month while living at home.

There's conflicting advice given on these boards, you see young adults regularly being advised to move back in with parents if they want to save a house deposit, then parents being advised to charge their adult children market rent to teach them about 'the real world'!

It's comparatively easy to save if you're not paying your own way.

Personally, I would have thought that most of the deposit was my parents' money in those circumstances. Nothing wrong with that as many parents help their kids with the deposit for their first home but I wouldn't want to fool myself that I'd done it all by my own efforts.

If young adults pay an amount for their food and their share of the bills (I don't buy this "the CH would be on anyway" malarkey) they will still be far better off than paying rent and living independently.

Person_one

Dunroamin wrote: »

It's comparatively easy to save if you're not paying your own way.

Personally, I would have thought that most of the deposit was my parents' money in those circumstances. Nothing wrong with that as many parents help their kids with the deposit for their first home but I wouldn't want to fool myself that I'd done it all by my own efforts.

If young adults pay an amount for their food and their share of the bills (I don't buy this "the CH would be on anyway" malarkey) they will still be far better off than paying rent and living independently.

I'm not denying my parents help was greatly beneficial, hence the phrase in my post 'thanks in no small part'. I'm not ashamed or embarrassed to have had that help though, the average age of a first time buyer is 37, isn't it? I was able to buy at 24 because we have a family culture of supporting and helping each other and not feeling the need to cling to pride in 'paying our way' with our loved ones.

Its only relatively recently that adults were all expected to be completely self sufficient all the time without ever getting help from or relying on family. It used to be completely normal for children to stay at home fully supported until they got married, and for elderly parents to move in with their children when they couldn't manage alone anymore.

lowlitmemory

Person_one wrote: »

Question to those of you who think adult children should be charged 'market rent' or other significant amount, even if on JSA. If your elderly parents moved in with you, would you take a chunk of their state pension off them?

I moved back in with my mum and dad when I lost my job, my relationship and my home within the space of 10 days. They didn't charge me any rent but they did come home to a clean house, a walked dog and tea started while I was unemployed, and then when I got a job I was out again within a few months.

Its wonderful to know you have the security that in hard times you can go home and be welcomed with open arms, and it cuts both ways, if any of my family members or close friends are in trouble they can come to me and always have a place to sleep, there's no way they'd be charged.

No, because they're my parents, and have made huge sacrifices for me and loved me and brought me up.

There's also a vast difference between taking in someone in need, which I would do, and the OPs situation, where her child has a full-time, above minimum-wage job! I have been in the situation of needing help and we contributed what we could monetarily but mainly tried to help with the household chores, as I would hope anyone else in that situation would do. The OPs daughter doesn't even do that basic part of gratitude.

Person_one

lowlitmemory wrote: »

No, because they're my parents, and have made huge sacrifices for me and loved me and brought me up.

There's also a vast difference between taking in someone in need, which I would do, and the OPs situation, where her child has a full-time, above minimum-wage job! I have been in the situation of needing help and we contributed what we could monetarily but mainly tried to help with the household chores, as I would hope anyone else in that situation would do. The OPs daughter doesn't even do that basic part of gratitude.

The OP does have a tricky situation, but a lot of the posts here have been a bit more general about ALL adult children at home, so I'm answering those.

Mojisola

Person_one wrote: »

It used to be completely normal for children to stay at home fully supported until they got married, and for elderly parents to move in with their children when they couldn't manage alone anymore.

Not in the areas I grew up in - children were expected to contribute to the household as soon as possible. We were encouraged to stay in education but, as soon as we were old enough, got Saturday jobs to help the family finances.

It was quite normal for young working adults to have to hand their wage packet over to Mum on a Friday night and get "pocket money" back. Everything else went into the family pot.

Dunroamin

Person_one wrote: »

Its only relatively recently that adults were all expected to be completely self sufficient all the time without ever getting help from or relying on family. It used to be completely normal for children to stay at home fully supported until they got married, and for elderly parents to move in with their children when they couldn't manage alone anymore.

I have no idea where you get that idea from as it's completely untrue.

What is recent is the idea that young adults should be able to live at home and keep all their earnings for themselves, or to pay only nominal contributions.

Many teenagers had to leave school as soon as possible because their earnings were important to the family budget. (Not that anyone would want to see a return of that!) Those that remained in education were considered to be very well supported by their parents but were expected to pay in the proper amount to the family kitty as soon as they found work.

I can think of no time in history when it was normal for "children to stay at home fully supported until they got married" and really cannot see where you go that idea from.

Dunroamin

Mojisola wrote: »

It was quite normal for young working adults to have to hand their wage packet over to Mum on a Friday night and get "pocket money" back. Everything else went into the family pot.

As indeed it was for the father of the family, who was usually the breadwinner.