Can't take much more.

falko89

Sambucus_Nigra wrote: »

So you think that going into work smiling and saying good morning to people will annoy them? What do you usually do then?

No one says good morning to anyone. I go in clock on, go out for a smoke and then go to work, I am usually one of the first there so don't come into contact with anyone usually, I don't know where you work but I've never gone in smiled and said good morning to anyone in any job I've had, no one else does either.

marybelle01

falko89 wrote: »

I do know I was reported, I can tell by the way they squirmed when I confronted them, the red faces gave them away, add to that one of them dropped a hint one day about the other one so they did report me, if these guys are friends who needs enemies. I did eat with everyone else, but after I confronted these guys the atmosphere changed, you can tell when your not wanted or I can, I prefer my own company anyway.

Fine. I suggest you look for an opening as a hermit.

You may be right, but you seem as set on making things worse than you say they are. It just isn't possible to find a workplace where everyone will go out of their way to make you welcome, and you either return it in kind and try to !!!! people off - which you seem set on doing - or you make an effort to fit in and resolve differences.

Sambucus_Nigra

falko89 wrote: »

No one says good morning to anyone. I go in clock on, go out for a smoke and then go to work, I am usually one of the first there so don't come into contact with anyone usually, I don't know where you work but I've never gone in smiled and said good morning to anyone in any job I've had, no one else does either.

I go in and smile every day.

Always have, always will. Even in jobs I hated I would still go in smiling. Because that's what you do. Each to their own.

falko89

So what do I do then? I don't make friends easily and for that reason I don't have any, I can't make small talk, I struggle to string a sentence together sometimes without stuttering because of my social anxiety, I think people see it as a weakness and that they can walk over you which is how I often end up in these situations and these type of incidents do follow me about, then they stand red faced when I confront them, they don't like it, it doesn't go down well but what's the alternative get walked over?

falko89

To answer my own question I think best advice is to go an see this manager guy tomorrow and lay my cards on the table.

teajug

Why not take a book and read it at lunch time and just ignore them, if they do not want to make conversation that is how it going to be. Just do your job and do not let them get under your skin they are not worth it.
Just be yourself and forget they are there.

LadyMissA

marybelle01 wrote: »

Fine. I suggest you look for an opening as a hermit.

.

sorry but that line made me laugh

Macca83_2

You stutter, you can't string a sentence together but you can stand up and confront them?

I think you need to relax just a little. Starting a New job is always difficult. You want to be able to pull your weight, make a good impression and show you're up to the job. I appreciate your position may be harder than most, suffering from social anxiety. But if you segregate yourself from the rest of the workforce, don't smile or greet your colleagues in the morning and only talk to them in order to 'confront them' i think that i would be a bit wary of you too.

You need to change your mindset. Not very easy i know but it can be done. I went through a rough patch at work. The management were bullies, every night without fail someone went home in tears. It got to the point where i dreaded going in. What really made the difference was learning to accept that it was only a job. I could only do my best. I stopped trying to second guess what everyone else was up to and stayed out of the office politics. It worked for me id

marybelle01

falko89 wrote: »

So what do I do then? I don't make friends easily and for that reason I don't have any, I can't make small talk, I struggle to string a sentence together sometimes without stuttering because of my social anxiety, I think people see it as a weakness and that they can walk over you which is how I often end up in these situations and these type of incidents do follow me about, then they stand red faced when I confront them, they don't like it, it doesn't go down well but what's the alternative get walked over?

Of course people don't like it if you expect them to make all the effort and the only time you ever talk to them is when you confront them. You may not realise this, but that can come across as just aggressive. You never smile at people (unless you think it will !!!! them off), you don't talk to them, you don't make an effort, you make assumptions about what they are thinking or doing (by the way, my family are Irish catholics and there isn't an O' or a Mc in sight! ), eat on your own, smoke on your own. Sorry but if you were in my workplace we'd take it you didn't like us too! It would be really nice if every workplace rolled out the red carpet for the newbie, but in many you just have to make your own way. You have to break the ice and be sociable. And do you really think that running to the boss telling tales will improve matters? Or that he's going to risk annoying the entire of the rest of his employees by dressing them down about not playing nice with the new boy? Or that if he does, which I doubt, things are going to get better? Because they won't. If you think they are out to get you now, just wait and see how much they'll be out to get you after that.

Sambucus_Nigra

LadyMissA wrote: »

sorry but that line made me laugh

Me too. :rotfl::rotfl::rotfl: