Benefits of marriage

Jei70

Compared to another committed relationship (living together unmarried), what, if any, are the benefits of marriage?

I'm interested in both financial and less easily measurable benefits!

Bit of background - I'm 36 and have never been married, OH is divorced. I can't really see the point of marriage (unless for religious reasons) but people keep commenting that it's 'my turn'. I'm not so sure, so please share your experience/advice with me.

Thanks!

JennyW_2

it amazes me the amount of people who want to hear of the financial benefits of marriage

I married my husband because I loved him and wanted to spend the rest of my life with him. Plus I wouldn't want him introducing me as his "girlfriend" when I'm 65 :rotfl:

BargainHunterCat

I don't think there really are any monetary plusses except you have more rights as & when you split up (heaven forbid!)
Other people are wrong to try & pressure you into it. You should only get married if you feel it's right for you & your OH. I certainly wouldn't get married just for financial purposes!
Marriage used to be considered socially highly desirable if not compulsory, but that's not the case anymore, so if you don't feel it's for you then don't do it!!
If 2 people want to be togther, they'll stay together. I don't think a legal piece of paper makes much difference either way.
Only do it for you not for anybody else!
Trust me, I got married for all the wrong reasons & I'm still paying the price!

Ember999

Jei70 wrote: »

Compared to another committed relationship (living together unmarried), what, if any, are the benefits of marriage?

I'm interested in both financial and less easily measurable benefits!

Bit of background - I'm 36 and have never been married, OH is divorced. I can't really see the point of marriage (unless for religious reasons) but people keep commenting that it's 'my turn'. I'm not so sure, so please share your experience/advice with me.

Thanks!

Okay...many benefits of being married and non to 'living together' as I see it.

Married:

You can claim state pension based on your husbands contributions at pensionable age if you have not worked the whole required time to claim a pension of your own - very important benefit as I see it.

On either death, your assets up to a certain amount pass to each other free of capital gains tax (think thats what it is called)

In times of medical emergency YOU have the right to what happens to your husband/wife rather than other family members who would be classed as his next of kin if you were not married.

You are entitled to financial things in the event of a divorce if your husband decides to trade you in for another model. If you were living together - you are not legally entitled to anything.

etc. etc.


There are many reasons to get married as you are more secure financially, future wise, your children have the same name as both parents and have a more stable life (in my opinion, before you all start saying living together is the same, which it is not)

However, you should get married for the right reasons - because you love someone and want to spend your life with them, not for the many benefits. But, if you want benefits, marriage offers many, living together offers non other than either party can run off with little consequence.

Ember xx

Snaggles

Fab post Ember!

Justie

Ember's covered the main things I think.

For me the main thing was a legal short cut to make sure that things like medical decisions would be clear, any property etc would be managed in the event of death or the end of the relationship and it's easier to make clear responsibilities for children etc (although parental responsibility is now clearer than it was without being married).

I don't need a bit of paper to make my commitment to my OH any more binding nor to express my love for him and I didn't care all that much about wearing a pretty frock and having a party. What I wanted was a way of making the security of the practical side clear and while this can be done in other ways it's far easier to get married. It may not sound romantic and there are many who might say that it's not 'the right' reason to get married but having seen so many of the people I know have troubles when a relationship has gone sour (and most of the women have left with nothing or less than was their due). And having seen the difficulties that can occur in hospitals in the event of serious medical decisions having to be made I made a pragmatic decision.

What marriage isn't is a short cut to an easy relationship. Nor is it a magic spell to keep a couple together all of those things take work whether in a marriage or a long term partnership. All the stats can say what they want about marriages tending to last longer than living together but each individual couple is different and I know as many couples who have divorced as those who have split from long term living together relationships. Marriage is not the glue that sticks you together that's hard work and communication...

Morglin

It does help (legally) if you are wed.

But, the only reason to get married is that you love and want to publicy promise to spend the rest of your days with someone.

I had no reason to get wed, but I'm glad I did - it's much nicer than just shacking up.

Lin

Katmc2k

hello

i worked as a researcher for a family support charity and the benefits of marriage on family life, income, employability, health, life expectancy, stress levels, children's welfare, general happiness, suicide rates etc were quite a shock to me. the research said even unhappy marriages were more beneficial than happier cohabiting couples (i'm not married, quite happy cohabiting so dont shoot me down non-married people!)

while its not for everyone, there is published research about its benefits. (enough to persuade my boss at the time to get married, even though she'd sworn off it!) but i wouldn't think you should do it so that you can benefit from the list above. it should be about the pretty dress and the presents :rotfl:

Mrs_pbradley936

Ember has most things covered. The legal benefits are not readily apparent when you are young. Usually because you do not have much money and any you do have is spoken for by mortgage or rent, loan, credit cards etc. As you get older and assets become paid for, pension funds mount up and perhaps older relatives die and leave you something there is money which the tax man would love to target. They are out of bounds to him if you are legally married or in a registered partnership if you are gay.

Jei70

Thanks everyone for your input.

I want to clarify that my partner and I do love each other and want to spend the rest of our lives together. To me, a piece of paper wouldn't change how I feel about him. What I'm looking for here are the legal/tax/financial implications (and this is a finance-oriented board, after all!!!) that I haven't considered before or am completely unaware of, that might make me change my mind about marriage.

And for research - I remember reading that marriage increases longevity in men, but decreases it in women! LOL, I don't have a source for this, but it stuck in my mind...

Please keep your thoughts and advice coming.

inkie

We will have been married for 15 years this year (i'm 35), and I don't honestly know where the time has gone. It's wonderful - I think that marriage should be championed and celebrated.
No, the 'piece of paper' does not change the way I feel about my hubby - it's the formal lifetime commitment that goes with it, and for us - bieng married in the eyes of God, therefore a divine blessing on our relationship and subsequent family.