Surrogacy ?

LavenderBoy

pleasedelete wrote: »

Are you single or a same sex male couple? That may make it harder to find a surrogate in the uk. Have you the funds to go overseas as it may be easier.

My same sex male friends looked into it quite extensively but found the costs too prohibitive in the end (about £60k I think). That was in the USA but India was much cheaper.

Depends on if the surrogate is the biological mother or not.

Well I am in a same sex relationship myself and my partner , and I'm male ha !

Yeh I looked at foreign surrogacy , There are various countries where it could be 'fast tracked' so to speak like India and I saw a site for Ukraine too.

It is very expensive and I think Id like to build a relationship up with the actual surrogate mother.....I'd love to be able to class them as a close friend, send pictures occasionaly and let the child know where he/she came from.

Maybe it would be too hard for the mother to see pictures I dont know ?

But I think building a strong relationship to begin with would only help the process become succesful.

pleasedelete

At one point my friends were looking at getting an egg from the USA but having the suurogate in India which was much cheaper. The legal cost and uk social services and adoption costs were large. The baby would have had no biological link to the surrogate.


I would think it was much harder to find a uk surrogate who wanted an ongoing relationship but you may be lucky.

LavenderBoy

pleasedelete wrote: »

At one point my friends were looking at getting an egg from the USA but having the suurogate in India which was much cheaper. The legal cost and uk social services and adoption costs were large. The baby would have had no biological link to the surrogate.


I would think it was much harder to find a uk surrogate who wanted an ongoing relationship but you may be lucky.

Yeh I undertsad it would be really rare for a woman to want to keep in touch.

It would take a special person but I would ideally like to find one.

I just like the idea of building a strong friendship even if we are miles away and so that the surrogate know the baby will go to a really good home therefore I would think strengthen the whole idea of her handing over the baby.

I watched a programme on UK Surrogacy a while ago think it was on Sky was very interseting to watch and see the dynamics.

If I cant find what I am looking for in the UK

Then your suggestion does sound like it could be a viable option so many different routes to take ! just wanna make sure I make the right steps x

DuckEggGingham

I would do this in a heartbeat. I have offered for close family but the time has never been right.

Just imagine watching that moment that the baby is being placed in the waiting arms of the parents, I cant imagine many things greater then seeing that happening!

To be given the opportunity to see the gift of a family you helped create go through the ages is something that I feel would be just amazing! From my research not many intended parents want the ongoing contact for whatever reason, so to see someone actually wanting that is refreshing!

There is a massive USA board on surrogacy: http://www.surromomsonline.com/support/ and whilst I know its not UK orientated, it may help give more of an insight.

LavenderBoy

DuckEggGingham wrote: »

I would do this in a heartbeat. I have offered for close family but the time has never been right.

Just imagine watching that moment that the baby is being placed in the waiting arms of the parents, I cant imagine many things greater then seeing that happening!

To be given the opportunity to see the gift of a family you helped create go through the ages is something that I feel would be just amazing! From my research not many intended parents want the ongoing contact for whatever reason, so to see someone actually wanting that is refreshing!

There is a massive USA board on surrogacy: http://www.surromomsonline.com/support/ and whilst I know its not UK orientated, it may help give more of an insight.

Aw you sound delightful hehe

You sound like a breath of fresh air ! Your post has gave me hope

I'm surprised nobody has ever taken you up on your offer esepcially family members

I'll definetly have a little browse of the other website see if I can join up and get chatting, x

veekay

I've been a surrogate myself so I can answer a few questions.
The surrogate is the legal mother (and her huband is the legal father, if married). Six weeks after the baby is born, the parents apply for a parental order. Once granted, the surrogate loses any rights/ parental responsibility and a new birth certificate is issued.
There are two major organisations in the UK where intended parents and surrogates can meet.

It is not prohibitively expensive to have a baby through surrogacy especially if it's straight surrogacy (surrogate using her own eggs) and that doesn't neccessarily require the use of a clinic.

Good luck

Hovel_lady

Have you seen these...

http://www.surrogacyuk.org/

http://www.surrogacy.org.uk/About_COTS.htm

DuckEggGingham

That is very nice of you to say When I offered, my sister in law wanted to be the one that tried to carry the pregnancy and I totally understand that. Since I offered circumstances have changed and they are not trying for children now. I want to be selfish and scream that I want to give them my niece or nephew but I have to respect their choice. Besides I am to old now I think lol!

From my research most surrogates do want ongoing contact but it seems (just from my research) that many intended parents take the baby and erm..kinda run So to me, YOU sound like a breath of fresh air lol!

I wish you the very best of luck in whatever choice you make x

LavenderBoy

DuckEggGingham wrote: »

That is very nice of you to say When I offered, my sister in law wanted to be the one that carried the pregnancy and I totally understand that. Since I offered circumstances have changed and they are not trying for children now. I want to be selfish and scream that I want to give them my niece or nephew but I have to respect their choice. Besides I am to old now I think lol!

From my research most surrogates do want ongoing contact but it seems (just from my research) that many intended parents take the baby and erm..kinda run So to me, YOU sound like a breath of fresh air lol!

I wish you the very best of luck in whatever choice you make x

Thankyou ! Ill keep you updated with my search x

LavenderBoy

Hovel_lady wrote: »

Have you seen these...

http://www.surrogacyuk.org/

http://www.surrogacy.org.uk/About_COTS.htm

Thanks I have had a look

Ive asked for an application pack to get started.