Surrogacy ?

LavenderBoy

zcrat41 wrote: »

There were some really good segments on Woman's hour on Radio 4 on this subject in the last couple of weeks. MIght be worth a google to see if you can listen again as they were very informative.

Good luck whatever you decide.

Thankyou ! I will need to have a listen , theres various forums etc. out there mite be worth going on them too so much to do ! hehe

hawk30

OP, first of all it's illegal to advertise for or advertise to be a surrogate, so it can be very difficult to find a surrogate. There are some organisations such as COTS that can help. Secondly, you have to take into account the fact that legally the child is the surrogate's. Therefore if they decide to keep the baby there is nothing you can do about it. For me this makes surrogacy a no go area. If you do decide to go down this route you would need to find someone you trust.

pleasedelete

Are you single or a same sex male couple? That may make it harder to find a surrogate in the uk. Have you the funds to go overseas as it may be easier.

My same sex male friends looked into it quite extensively but found the costs too prohibitive in the end (about £60k I think). That was in the USA but India was much cheaper.

Depends on if the surrogate is the biological mother or not.

coinxoperated

Fostering and Adoption also has significant rewards. Adopting a young baby, in my eyes has the same risks as surrogacy post birth. The child may decide to look for its parents, some may not want too. It's amazing how many originally adopted/surrogate children actually end up in the care system when they start resenting now having their birth parents around. So many unanswered questions can be a lot for a teenager to take on. I would say that you should consider every eventuality, and fostering doesnt have to be a 'forever' role.

It may also help you understand the care system in more detail, allowing a better understanding an general knowledge of the adoption arena.

Wishing you all the best in whatever you do!

fluffnutter

SqueekyMouse wrote: »

I would be very wary of becoming an egg donor, since the chances of reproductive cancers rockets with repeat donation due to the drugs they use to trigger hyper-ovulation.

Do you have a link to research that supports this?

SqueekyMouse

fluffnutter wrote: »

Do you have a link to research that supports this?

I can do some digging on pubmed if you're interested in the primary papers, but my information came from a seminar I attended when working as a post doctoral research associate. Personally I don't know too much about these specific cancers since my focus was on skin and colorectal cancers, but it was an interesting factoid that stuck in my head since I wasn't sure if I'd be able to conceive naturally at that point

fluffnutter

SqueekyMouse wrote: »

I can do some digging on pubmed if you're interested in the primary papers, but my information came from a seminar I attended when working as a post doctoral research associate. Personally I don't know too much about these specific cancers since my focus was on skin and colorectal cancers, but it was an interesting factoid that stuck in my head since I wasn't sure if I'd be able to conceive naturally at that point

I've googled a little and found some links to a Dutch survey conducted some years ago which found a possible link between IVF and ovarian cancers. However, it was inclusive and was also conducted before the protocol for IVF changed (after which point far lower doses of drugs were given). Crucially the number of IVF cycles a women underwent didn't seem to increase the risk. This seemed to be a key component of your warning.

The same study also found an increased risk of endometrial cancer in women who'd undergone IVF but interestingly found an even bigger increase in the control group (women reporting fertility problems but not undergoing IVF) - suggesting that it's infertility that's causing the problems, not the IVF treatment.

A review of 15 studies of breast cancer and IVF treatment have found no real link between the two.

I was a bit wary that you'd been reading some DM 'everything gives you cancer' story and wanted to add a little balance. TBH, you can get any result you want if you google hard enough. No doubt someone could find some evidence if they wanted to.

Bluemeanie_2

I am curious if you are a single man or female etc? Just because of your username "Lavenderboy".

I think I could possibly be a surrogate after having my own children. However being legally the child's Mother would put me off.

Good luck with it.

lilymay1

Bluemeanie wrote: »

I think I could possibly be a surrogate after having my own children. However being legally the child's Mother would put me off.

I'm pretty sure I'd be able to carry someone else's child, provided I had no biological link to it.

Does that still make you the legal mother I wonder?

Bluemeanie_2

lilymay1 wrote: »

I'm pretty sure I'd be able to carry someone else's child, provided I had no biological link to it.

Does that still make you the legal mother I wonder?

Yes, it makes you legally the Mother, even if the egg wasn't yours. I'm unsure if the real Mother would have to adopt the child, or the surrogate just hands the baby over.