Hoarding...not just on TV

whitewing

Hey well done byatt, I am looking forward to hearing how it goes tomorrow (hopefully not at the Vets, just your visitor and before and after pics).

blossomhill_2

Byatt wrote: »

Well, barring anything untoward happenning (pooch is poorly and may need a vet appt), I have a friend coming for coffee tomorrow. :eek::T

Byatt, I think if we could have made a wish at the beginning of the year, this is what we would all have wished for you! (actually don't think I've been here a year, but you know what I mean!) I am so pleased you have got to this stage

I've got to the stage where I can say to people "I can't ask you in cos I tend to hoard things and I am sorting it out" whereas before I would have come up with all sorts of bizarre excuses. And certain people can and do come in because I don't mind them seeing the stage I am at!

sjp - I do worry about your ironing, and the amount of washing in fact, I think if I was faced with it I'd be just doing a conditioner rinse on some of it and tumble drying so it didn't need ironing

steph - hi and welcome, if you are planning a wedding you will want to approach it with as clear a head as possible, and surplus "stuff" will prevent that - have you come across the term "churning"? It's where a hoarder reorganises their stuff without actually getting rid of any - it sounds like you end up chucking it all back in because you are churning and trying to deal with it all at once.
Could you part with some of the gift sets, via eBay maybe, or by putting an imaginary value on them and donating them - 4 gifts sets at a fiver =£20 to the homeless charity in time for Christmas? Then progress to eBaying the remainder once you have created some space
Or I advise people to chose random things to start with - eg find 3 black tshirts that could go out. Or 1 pair of shoes a week, it's better than a vague "must organise my room" which is not quanitifiable.
In the early days I decided to make myself list my clothes, knowing there would come a point when I thought "why am I listing this skirt that I will never wear again" and throw it out instead
I think you may need to involve your significant other a bit more, as it will be both of your home and he/she should have some involvement in it and may already be worrying about how you will both cope or your joint spending - as you will see from the rest of this thread, the impact on our nearest and dearest can be considerable and we'd like to help you avoid that

GQ - good luck with the freezer, I hope you don't defrost rhubard for a crumble only to find it is celery!

Other friends :santa2: keep up the good work but don't forget the fun :snow_laug even if you do have week off work to clear out the attic!

whitewing

tiny steps...I bought some second hand books last week from the local church and have passed them on straight away as soon as I've read them. This is miraculous for me. Have 5 strips of cards on the wall - they are going up as soon as they're received.

Had a pile of printed off puzzles and stuff, seems such a waste to chuck them, so I've decided I shall do them over the next few days and then chuck. My brain is getting a workout and feels so much better for it too.

I have small piles of kipple lurking throughout the house. It is gradually going. I am quite looking forward to the new year; always like decluttering and cleaning for then.

sjprmc01

I worry about it too! Lol! Tbh, I just need to get rid of half the clothes but that is the thing I find the toughest, I'm FINE at getting rid of stuff the kids have grown out of but I cannot bear to give away stuff that still fits them in case I need it for 'x' occasion!

I am getting better, I realise they are now barely getting the use out of more than half of it probably, now they are all at skl all day and I have cut down the amount I buy DRASTICALLY. I'd normally have bought them clothes for Xmas but I've only got them pjs which they need anyway, a boden hoodie my eldest liked that I got for £7 and a track suit for her that she needed anyway.

Is never going to be a quick fix with me where clothes are concerned, but they will slowly deplete themselves naturally if I stop buying!

I'd LOVE to chuck stuff in the dryer and not iron but I'm a bit OCD with clothes. As ice said before, I cannot make myself put stuff away if its not ironed and folded/hung and I really can't bring myself to chuck most items in the dryer either!

GreyQueen

blossomhill wrote: »

GQ - good luck with the freezer, I hope you don't defrost rhubard for a crumble only to find it is celery!

Other friends :santa2: keep up the good work but don't forget the fun :snow_laug even if you do have week off work to clear out the attic!

LOL, haven't done the celery/rhubarb mixeroonie but did defrost what I thought was an oblong container of pasta-ish sauce to discover it was actually stewed pears.:rotfl:

That caused some interesting fast footwork on the meal plan. It's great living alone in repect that if you screw up on the food, you don't have to face disapointed looks or beyatching from other family members.

One thing my family always used to do (and which I may try to revive this year as we haven't done it for a while) is to hit the loft in the doldrums between Boxing Day and New Year. We used to be able to scare up a car load of packaging materials chiefly cardboard and polystrene from things bought in the past 12 months and get that out to the tip.

As the proud chatelaine of one of the smallest flats in captivity, I go orbital with the exhortations on appliance instructions to keep the packaging. But the folks do, for at least a year, in their loft. I encouraged them to write on the outside of the box Discard after (date) so that when they found them, they'd know. It's good to have some of the flammables out of the loft space.

Incidentally, a talk I was once privileged to attend by a senior fire officer mentioned that it isn't at all uncommon for fires to start in lofts as a result of electric problems and to get well alight before the householder notices. This man recommended having a smoke detector in the loft itself and my parents took that on board and installed their own.

Mum is speaking freely and frequently about wanting to declutter, not prompted by me, so we may have reached the point where I can assist her with some stuff this holiday, once our company has gone home. It's the work of months and years as they've been 41 years in the same small house, but I feel that perhaps she has reached a tipping point.

Who knows? We'll see what we can do. One positive character trait is that she is a naturally caring person and would give you the shirt off her back, so if we can parlay that into c.s. donations etc, we may be able to rehome stuff in the New Year.

Great progess with reading-and-redonating books, btw. I have started to do this myself and some of them are back in circulation in a week. As I read a fair amount of whodunnits, there's limited point in keeping them for a re-read.

Onwards and outwards, my lovelies.

whitewing

byatt, I'm dying for an update...hope friend has come and there has been no vet appointment.

Now, if anyone can tell me where we've hidden the Christmas cheer, I would be grateful. It is distinctly lacking today. We all have sore throats etc, not enough to stop us working but we're grumbling away at each other, even though we're achieving quite a lot and should have a lovely chill out over Xmas.

Byatt

Hi, well, the visit was fab. I was so nervous! Friend loved my little cottage and it felt lovely, she was so genuine and it was so nice to let her look around (except for the bedroom which isn't so bad but still not good enough to let people see yet).

Here's a link to a before pic and 3 or 4 after pics, let me know if it doesn't work or you all see more than you should. :rotfl::p

I will not leave the before pic up for ever, but just wanted you to see how I lived, even though embarrassing and mortifying. :eek::o

http://s162.beta.photobucket.com/user/bessiesmom/library/De%20Richarding

lostinrates

Byatt it looks lovely, and somehow very 'warm'.


My friends.....there is now nothing in my sitting room that should not be there. I have some picture rearranging to do, and aroper vacuum and then it's back to how It should be.

Meanwhile we started on the dining room. Which is harder because it's had so much stored in it. It's not going to be able to be as clear as the sitting room for a while (untill we can afford to have the bookshelves made for the study) but it can be clear apart from boxes and clean right up to thje edges.

Then it's just the hall way tidy (not TOO bad) and then the down stairs of my house is very nice.

Upstairs we keep plodding away. .

whitewing

byatt, I can honestly say that my house, after I split up with my previous boyfriend, was like your 'before' picture. There was a lot of deep-seated sadness at that point.

I love your white Christmas tree.

DH has gone shopping so we will be drinking snowballs when he comes back. Need something to look forward to. Work is going slowly and I keep getting interrupted by phone calls, which isn't a problem except that my throat is a bit sore.

Got £15 from selling some unused stuff from earlier in the year so am pleased about that.

blossomhill_2

It all look so nice now Byatt, you can see it was a waste to keep it hidden, I am sure your friend was genuinely pleased to be able to spend time with you in such a nice home!

Your before pic - well I can relate to it totally, a mix of things you have to have (heaters, vacuums) with things you'd like to have (plants) and things you need to sort out (paperwork) - mine was just the same, in fact still is to an extent, and looking at yours before anyone would just see it was cluttered not dirty or neglected (I was always moving things to clean under and behind them but it was taking up so much time!)

I hope it is feeling a lot more like home to you these days