Hoarding...not just on TV

Jojo_the_Tightfisted

And do talk to us if you want to. We're independent and able to be ignored quite easily

sjprmc01

Hmm not sure. The dd I bought the clothes for tends to waste stuff a lot so I'm guessing the £9 in primark and £6 in mr Ts on her wasn't drastic I hadn't planned. To have to buy her stuff though I think it had ore to do with lack of planning for packing (hence the socks too) and oh moaning that we had too much stuff (yeah he had about a weeks clothes with him for all weathers we had the right amount of clothes for one set each day and look we ran out coz I didn't take extras)

The jacket I see as good as I had been looking out for one. However because I saw it in my size I bought it whereas I'd normally have tried to get it on offer online (mr Ts again). I'm noticing I seem to spend quite a lot more in mr Ts that I ever thought I did.

Kids here only have 1.5 weeks left off school so I just keep thinking 'oh things can get back to normal after that'. What I've bought/spent on stuff is less than I normally would but I'd love to have been so organised in the first place that I hadn't needed to buy more clothes. I also fell back on my statement of not buying anything else! Grr! Don't think I will have reason to buy anything this week!

The girls, however, stayed at grannys last night and came home with 4prs school shoes (for 3 of them) numerous nighties she had picked up in the sale, school cardi, tights and blue baseball boots and toys . Luckily the toys were tat and are already being discarded.

Today we brought sponge bob and Patrick, whoopee cushions and flick books, oh and pencils and drawing sheets. All freebies from my work fun day neither good nor bad.

Jojo_the_Tightfisted

This is how I know if I need something or not.




And this is how I get unexpected extras:

Mistral001

I have come late to this thread and have not read many posts, but I understand the thread started out with the OP wanting to understand why her mother hoards things as well as to vent her frustration with her mother.

People who hoard are demonised in out society today and I think that these recent TV programmes about them have not done anything to help them. they were not always demonised. They were seen as eccentric maybe but not to be set up for redicule.

By the way I am not a hoarder myself, but have known some people could have been described as such and they are/were some of the nicest people I have ever met.

Edit: perhaps if the Op wants to help her mother she should try not to see her as someone who she wants to "improve" or mould into what she thinks of as a better person.

dumpy

as a lurker who has read all the posts, can i suggest you go back and read a few more posts about the op's mother?

I've been reading this thread as someon who didn't think they had a problem. BUT then I saw a photo of one room (geat way to really see the clutter) and I realised I was "walking the available route" to get into another.

So hello all :j and I've sorted out a huge pile of paperwork today and have my eye on a large number of cookery magazines.

elona

If you read all the posts did you miss the bit where her mother asked for help and intimated the mess and clutter meant she could become homeless?

Did you also miss the bit where the OP was met with violence and was physically hurt?


I doubt if anyone on the thread thinks they are in a state that needs a visit from Kim and Aggie but realise that stuff can accumulate over time and that it can be a struggle to keep on top of things so we are encouraging each other to do so.

I cleared another kitchen cupboard today and have decided to use up things and make sure I know what I have.

Mistral001

dumpy wrote: »

as a lurker who has read all the posts, can i suggest you go back and read a few more posts about the op's mother?

I've been reading this thread as someon who didn't think they had a problem. BUT then I saw a photo of one room (geat way to really see the clutter) and I realised I was "walking the available route" to get into another.

So hello all :j and I've sorted out a huge pile of paperwork today and have my eye on a large number of cookery magazines.

I have read quite a few more post now as you have suggested. Not them all I have to admit.

I see now that the mother's house is quite a dirty house as well as cluttered. That is perhaps just as big of an issue as the clutter if not bigger.

Is there any way of just concentrating on cleaning the house of dirt and not doing anything with the junk. Even if the sensible thing might seem to be to throw lots of things away. it will need a lot of extra work I know and there will not be much to show for it, but at least it will mean that the place smells better and the Op will be more comfortable visiting.

blossomhill_2

sjprmc01 wrote: »

The girls, however, stayed at grannys last night and came home with 4prs school shoes (for 3 of them)

How bizarre, are they meant to wear the spare pair in rotation?

This made me think of my old dad; he and his brother went to school on alternate days as they only had one pair of shoes between them (which I imagine fitted neither of them and it was a 5 mile walk)

Hi dumpy - love the phrase "walking the available route" and will use it relentlessly until I eliminate the problem - I used to wonder if neighbours looking in thought i was on a track, as I could only walk up and down the lounge along a set route

The debate about TV helping/not helping sufferers is true of all programmes about people with exteme conditions - part therapy/part freakshow - I think the main thing they do is bring to light how vulnerable the sufferers are, and have been thinking about Richard constantly since first seeing his story

blossomhill_2

Mistral001 wrote: »

I have read quite a few more post now as you have suggested. Not them all I have to admit.

I see now that the mother's house is quite a dirty house as well as cluttered. That is perhaps just as big of an issue as the clutter if not bigger.

Is there any way of just concentrating on cleaning the house of dirt and not doing anything with the junk. Even if the sensible thing might seem to be to throw lots of things away. it will need a lot of extra work I know and there will not be much to show for it, but at least it will mean that the place smells better and the Op will be more comfortable visiting.

You need to listen as well as hear - OP was banned from mother's house due to mother's intransigence/abusive nature

GreyQueen

Hi JoJo, loving the pic of your cat, such a sweetie.

Can I be a nosy moo and ask about the top picture? Is that a very deep drawer with some kind of cloth dividers in it?

I have been steeling myself to throw away food packaging of the non-recyclable kind without fretting about washing them up and repurposing them. It's hard to understand the compulsion I have for containers.

Maybe it's hardwired into the species to collect receptacles because we are hunter/gatherers?

I have also found a recycling bin big enough to take the 4 pint containers which I previously had to hang onto until I could get them to the parents' in a different council area where they have a mixed recycling wheely bin collection.

Fingers crossed for the job, btw, sounds like it would be right up your street, literally and figuratively.

Byatt take care of yourself, hun, and come back to us when you're able.