Nice people thread part 6 - thrice by twice as nice :)

PasturesNew

silvercar wrote: »

Thanks for this.

Of the 14 months since diagnosis, we had spent more time together than in the previous years. A lot of that time was "good time". He felt fine, if tired, through most of the chemo and we went out and about in a way we never did (due to the distance) when he wasn't ill. So there are a lot of good memories created because he had C.

Mine was diagnosed the same time as yours, roughly... and immediately put onto drugs that stopped him eating as taste had gone .... and we did nothing except get through each day, with my old being awkward/anxious and irrational.... leading to lots of tongue biting and me trying to be firm but kind .... tough times. Mine went quickly after the diagnosis, the drugs meaning there was no quality of life whatsoever from diagnosis to death

silvercar wrote: »

So, at the moment, the main regrets are the years when we were so busy with our own lives that we didn't spend much quality time together. Plus the boys dodn't have that much of a relationship with their grandparents on my side, and hadn't got to see him since February.:o

Yes, all the things you now think you could/should have done. And then, there's all the things you'll now do and you'll think "he'd have LOVED this..." and cry a bit. And you'll do stuff you feel he missed because he'd have loved it ... and cry a bit more.



I should shut up now...

PasturesNew

People didn't get rewarded for exams etc in my day .... not just me, I wasn't aware of anybody getting a bung or gift from their parents.

silvercar

PasturesNew wrote: »

Mine was diagnosed the same time as yours, roughly... and immediately put onto drugs that stopped him eating as taste had gone .... and we did nothing except get through each day, with my old being awkward/anxious and irrational.... leading to lots of tongue biting and me trying to be firm but kind .... tough times. Mine went quickly after the diagnosis, the drugs meaning there was no quality of life whatsoever from diagnosis to death

The big difference is that mine had my mum to care and look after him and she did that well, so my role was to support both of them. Whereas you had 2 olds to look after. which is more than twice as hard.

vivatifosi

chewmylegoff wrote: »

I am trying to decide which is the stupidest sport in the Olympics. So far I reckon it is 10m air pistol shooting, although riding a horse around inside a tiny picket fence comes a close second. Least spectator friendly has to be judo - just impossible to understand if you don't know anything about it.

lostinrates wrote: »

Rofl, that one is the closest to my sport. Its from war movements and is harder than it looks.

If I had a sport which I was good at, it would be 10m air pistol shooting. What a team!

PasturesNew

silvercar wrote: »

The big difference is that mine had my mum to care and look after him and she did that well, so my role was to support both of them. Whereas you had 2 olds to look after. which is more than twice as hard.

Yes, mum was moaning all the time, refusing to even sit in the same room, saying "he won't stop speaking and I'm trying to read my magazines" ..... and then "I had that.... they can operate on him". So it was awful trying to get mum to ease up on dad and stay in the same room as him too ..... and the drugs he was on meant he was swinging between diarrhea and constipation. Tablets to solve one, then tablets to solve the other, then back/forth. Also, anorexic ... drugs altered the taste of all food so it was awful to him. I recorded food one day (that I forced him to eat) as one banana, two teaspoons of beans and two tablespoons of cereal. And that was with me standing over and monitoring!

He had most of the side effects, which wikipedia describes as:

The most common adverse events ... are
fatigue,
diarrhea,
nausea,
anorexia,
hypertension,
a yellow skin discoloration,
hand-foot skin reaction, and stomatitis.
.....
altered taste
constipation

He did have a booklet given at the Hospital, but we didn't find that until he'd died... he'd brought it home and squirreled it with "his things" and never realised, or never got it out. Most likely never realised.

Doctor didn't care, I called him out when the old was rolling in agony on the bed, Doctor came out, stood there and looked at him and said "I can't do anything for you. You're dying" and left it at that.

PasturesNew

silvercar wrote: »

... my mum ....

How old is she now? What's her health like? How's she coping?

zagubov

silvercar wrote: »

The big difference is that mine had my mum to care and look after him and she did that well, so my role was to support both of them. Whereas you had 2 olds to look after. which is more than twice as hard.

The world's economy is being taken over by countries where they value and respect their parents and older people in general and feel they should be looked after properly.

No wonder they get so many things right.

PasturesNew

zagubov wrote: »

The world's economy is being taken over by countries where they value and respect their parents and older people in general and feel they should be looked after properly.

No wonder they get so many things right.

It's hard to look after them properly .... when you have a living to earn.

vivatifosi

zagubov wrote: »

Did anyone notice in the opening ceremony how big many of the athletes were?

I'm reading this book, which is a great and timely read:

http://www.amazon.co.uk/The-Secret-Olympian-Olympic-Experience/dp/1408154927/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1343588745&sr=8-1

There's a section in it about how, when the athletes first get to the village, they are all taken aback by how differently shaped athletes from other disciplines are. For example, fencers have one developed leg that they lunge forward on and one developed arm which they fence with. Apparently athletes get a formal outfit as part of their kit. Fittings for that must be a nightmare.

lostinrates

I used to play the violin. One of the reasons i am glad i do not is the impact it can haveon a body.

Also, when dh started riding i made sure he mounted from both sides equally. While i have always used mounting blocks and got on horses purposly on the "wrong" side both to miniise risk of injury or unequal development t them ( and my saddles) now i cannot for the life of me mount from the right. It feels alien and dangerous andawkward in the extreme, so i have always mounted from the right from blocks like my mega block, and just ot put my foot in the stirrup.....which is a cop out.