Advice for a friend

peachyprice

The 'girlfriend' sounds very immature with absolutely no idea of life in the real world. I take it she's very young?

clearingout

peachyprice wrote: »

The 'girlfriend' sounds very immature with absolutely no idea of life in the real world. I take it she's very young?

they don't need to be young to have no idea....my ex left me for a woman with three children by three fathers who was on her....umpteenth affair. She had 'been there, done that' but obviously another attempt at the married, successful businessman with children in private school was too good to miss! Given that she was a freelance book-keeper and had been doing the books for a couple of years you'd have thought she'd have seen the inevitable coming ('cos it did come, as soon as I was no longer the person writing the tenders)...but apparently not. Mind boggles with the stupidity of it!

toniq

I don't know why you are getting involved, It would make people think it is you the so called "Friend",

And I'm sure you don't want to be in the firing line if he makes amends with his wife,as you will be if you get yourself involved.

Let him reap what he sowed and get on with it, The grass is never greener x

POPPYOSCAR

And the reason for doing this is what.... exactly....??????

londonsurrey

It's one thing to have a diverse range of friends and acquaintances.
It's quite another thing to enable stupid behaviour on their part.

So the chap's come to you, probably because he's hoping someone, anyone, will magically wave a wand to tell him :
- that what he's doing is ok
- that his immoral and stupid plans are ok, that it will all work out fine
- that all the injured parties (wife, family, friends, colleagues) magically be fine
- the authorities will not be a problem (what do you call wasting police resources on a search for a missing person)
- in other words, aww diddums, it's ok, go ahead and do what you like, grab what you want

It's up to you as a thinking person and a decent friend to tell him to man up and not try to offload his stupid mess on anyone he can.

shegirl

londonsurrey wrote: »

It's one thing to have a diverse range of friends and acquaintances.
It's quite another thing to enable stupid behaviour on their part.

So the chap's come to you, probably because he's hoping someone, anyone, will magically wave a wand to tell him :
- that what he's doing is ok
- that his immoral and stupid plans are ok, that it will all work out fine
- that all the injured parties (wife, family, friends, colleagues) magically be fine
- the authorities will not be a problem (what do you call wasting police resources on a search for a missing person)
- in other words, aww diddums, it's ok, go ahead and do what you like, grab what you want

It's up to you as a thinking person and a decent friend to tell him to man up and not try to offload his stupid mess on anyone he can.

Oh,of course what he's doing is ok...he'll have lied so much to the tart he's with giving excuses for cheating,that he'll have convinced himself it's all true:rotfl:

Jerk!

OP,why on earth would you want to give him any advice on this?I wouldn't do it -friend or not.He's made a giant mess,he can take full responsibility for anything that comes from it:D

BillTrac

How long do posters have to be on this site before they can stop being accused of being trolls?

IF this thread is a genuine question then I think your 'friend' and his tart deserve all the crap life can throw at them.

Typical irresponsible 'what can I screw the country out of rather than what can I contribute'

I hope they end up sleeping on park benches

londonsurrey

BillTrac wrote: »

I hope they end up sleeping on park benches

Which are taxpayer funded, so they're still leeching!

pogofish

BillTrac wrote: »

How long do posters have to be on this site before they can stop being accused of being trolls?

I wouldn't jump to assume this is just another troll. I have come across such clulessness a few times in real life. You could also say that one, other or both of them had some kind of issue or something lacking in every case.

But yes, it did involve rather immature people and a couple of times they actually tried it, only to find out the hard way that the very best they could expect was a few nights in a junkie-infested rathole of a B&B before someone put them straight and told them to get their backsides back home and do things properly.

DUTR

mithuthecat wrote: »

A very good friend has aked me for advice on a personal matter but I am not certain about the whys and wherefores so hoping members on here can help me out. So here goes and yes this is bound to raise some negative posts as well.
My friend is married and having an affair, wife knows and as you can imagine not happy, divorce has been mentioned amongst other things, his girlfriend has suggested that they pack up what they can into her car and just up and go,like running away and start a new life together, now both have little money, and my friend said if they turn up at some distant town and go to the council and say they are homeless, no job, no nothing what can they expect to recieve, my thoughts are that as he has walked out on everything including his job that I doubt he will get anything for at least 26 weeks, plus he has made himself intentionally homeless, as regarding benefits I do not think he will be entitled to anything,but may be wrong, any thoughts or input would be appreciated so I can pass onto him for his reaction

As others have mentioned the leaving of a job is silly and a good chance he will not get benefits or re homed quickly.
There is no reason why he cannot start a new life for himself, maybe maybe not with his current GF, but the running off seems a bit too irrational, he should think it allthrough more carefully, all he can be sure of right now is that the relationship with his wife is over.