Finally worked up the courage to write it all down...

YORKSHIRELASS

Hi, I dont really have anything new to add but I remember when I first came on here it was such a revelation that there were other people in the same boat. It has given me so much comfort and inspiration and its so nice to be able to speak honestly about your financial situation.

My hubby and I have big debts and small incomes. We are going to be chipping away at this for a long time but so long as we pay off every penny that we can and never ever use credit I know that we will get there - one day.

Oh and I have been on medication for anxiety too but I feel far less stressed about my finances now - yes I am in debt but I have taken control of the situation and that makes a huge difference.

Good luck with it.

Theatregal83

Good luck with your journey, as the saying goes one small step at a time, and you'll be there before you know it!

LaughingLorna

Constantly astounded and grateful to all for the wonderful words of encouragement and great ideas. even had a night out tonight and kept spends minimal as took big lunch to work and just paid for nibbles and had free tap water all night :-) sounds sad i know but just told everyone i was detoxing (didnt want to say was saving money because then my friends buy me drinks and they are amazing but dont like to feel like im sponging

Had a really good time knowing i wasnt going overdrawn and wouldnt have a hangover :-) did some more surveys tonight on way home as well so dont feel as bad about the equifax cost.

thanks to everyone who has shared their debt journey on their signatures - its sooo inspiring to see :-) grateful to all but yorkshire lass thank you for sharing about the meds. sometimes feel a bit self conscious on that but the more people i speak to the more i realise its more normal than we think...

thatsean

Hey LL, how's it going?

LaughingLorna

Hi guys, sorry been having a few down days and couldn't face logging on. Feel better now it's pay day. Kind of felt like I was letting myself and everyone down by messing up my NSD. Agreed to go out with people from work and even though I said I didn't want drinks other than water they bought me drinks on their rounds so had to reciprocate and it was £20 - got so depressed thinking how much of my surplus went in one go when i'd been so careful.

Was feeling really positive after getting on top of things and managed to get a few high value surveys from one poll and springboard but it comes in a lot slower than goes out!

Asked at work if i could claim money for my overtime but was told no - dont know what to do for best as want promotion but not getting in till 8/9 so doesn't leave much time for generating cash!

Thanks for checking in on me sean - perked me up. Feel better about things today - new payday - new start!

Had a bit of a knock when looked back on my spending diary i'd done on phone as per suggestion in earlier post and realised how easily i'd given up after that £20 went down drain I've spent another £10 on crap - magazines/ choc - makes me wonder how much money i'm wasting with mood swings. Making me wonder if it's too early to be coming off my pills.

Even though not been looking at my own thread while i've been feeling low (makes me feel worse seeing how happy I have been and realising how different it is to how feeling now) I've been reading other people's diaries and it all makes me realise it's not a short term fix and just got to stick at it through ups and downs and change lifestyle completely.

I also realised this week how some of my debt has happened - I spend money in anticipation of getting it! I'd been put forward for a £100 bonus this month but didn't get it in end because of budget constraints this month but mentally i'd spent it all - luckily didn't and really it should all be going on paying off debts if i do get it but £100 buffer would have been so nice!

Sorry to moan - just re-read this and it's not how I want to sound - part of reason didn't want to log on feeling like this...

thatsean

Don't stress - we all have bad days. I was close to tears on Monday I think when I logged on here to moan at nothing in particular. It happens to us all Lorna, and especially those of use who've suffered with stress/depression/anxiety etc... Don't beat yourself up about it.

I know what you mean about wasting money and how frustrating it can be, but now that you know the sort of things that set you off you can keep an eye out. A few drinks with colleagues now and again won't destroy the budget, and will give you a few good times to focus on.

So, as you say new start today. Deep breath and happy thoughts. Congratulate yourself on how far you've come!

You'll get there :-)

Barbeduk

It's a bit like a diet, you have a bad day and you start afresh the next. How about having a piggy bank or something on your kitchen windowsill and every time you're tempted by a magazine etc, put the money in there instead. Then at the end of the week/month open it up and see how much you saved yourself! Then you could treat yourself to something small and pay the rest to the debt.

My piggy bank now has £80 in it (started in jan) and it'll help me get through the summer holidays. All money I would have frittered away on rubbish.

Keep with it, you'll get there.

LaughingLorna

Thank you thats really helped put things in perspective. guess i've got to see it positively or it really is a waste of money! and you're right about triggers sean-much easier to spot these now i have my spend diary. just need to focus on the progress...

barbeduk thats so funny i was thinking it was like a diet yesterday while i was writing my post! on apositive have lost 3pounds since LBM -am aiming to generate 2k and lose 2stone by october (all the weight i put on over the time ive been on these pills!) want to get my life back and facing up to the debt means ive been motivated to make changes to other areas of my life too! on the good days that is...

LaughingLorna

Was just looking back at my SOA and realised i put december 16th as dfd but its actually december 2016 - dont know if it was me having a momwnt or some autoformatting thing on here. gonna try and shave some time off that though. feel like i cant make plans for rest of life till this is sorted...

on apositive note i found my old locker key from when i had gym membership and they should give me my £10 deposit back when i return that :-)

kerri_gt

Hi LL, just came across your thread x

LaughingLorna wrote: »

Thank you slowlyfading and hello! Failed in doing a no-spend day today. Forgot my packed lunch and caved about 3pm and bought a sandwich. None with reduced stickers so had to pay £2 - would have been better popping out earlier and having more cheap options to choose from!

Does anyone else find MSE gets into all aspects of your life? As I was walking out of the station this morning I found myself looking at everyone's clothes/handbags etc and thinking how much they were wearing in terms of ebay resale value!!! Also distracted me from buying a bacon sandwich since I brought fruit from home for brekkie.

Oh for sure, though I find myself constantly looking at the pavement keeping an eye out for 'road kill' or coupons :rotfl:

LaughingLorna wrote: »

Eeeeek just logged on to check bank account and Equifax have charged me 6.99 for my 'free report' even though i thought i'd been really careful to check there was no tie in 'free membership' period. Must have been in the small print T&Cs :mad:
So angry at myself!!!!

They charged my OH after he cancelled at the end of his free period - I complained and they did refund the money so it's worth a try

Try not to beat yourself up over the occasional magazine or bar of choc - some folks on the NSD challenge allow themselves a 'treat' sum each week - for example £5 for misc spends like choc and a magazine. Any change left out of that goes into a piggy bank and can be used towards paying off debts or a bigger treat at the end of the year or something.

I know you don't want to tell you OH and that's entirely up to you, but I would be surprised if he didn't know already, or at least have an incling esp if this is part of the reason you've been unwell and stressed.