Struggling

mealone

Hell hath nor fury is alive and well on this thread, men may leave a relationship, women may also leave a relationship but the children are forever and you should love your kids more than you hate your ex, end of.

Im sorry that mankind has treated some women so badly they have to join force with any other women claiming they have also been downtrodden but I personally read the words of that woman before joining a vengeful attack on all mankind.

Mrs.W_2

mealone wrote: »

Hell hath nor fury is alive and well on this thread, men may leave a relationship, women may also leave a relationship but the children are forever and you should love your kids more than you hate your ex, end of.

Im sorry that mankind has treated some women so badly they have to join force with any other women claiming they have also been downtrodden but I personally read the words of that woman before joining a vengeful attack on all mankind.

Right, so your posts reflect your personal bitterness. Caused by a situation that left you feeling helpless and alone?

Gigervamp

shegirl wrote: »

Whichever way OP,you should be giving him money towards the kids.It's the right thing to do and if you're having them part time at present it can't all be going into their savings.

IT would be the decent thing to do.

From what I've read, OP's ex has the kids ONE day more than OP does. The CB and TC that she's getting are going into a savings account for the children or to be given to the ex if needs be.

Why are you quibbling over one days worth of money which isn't being spent by the OP, let alone the 3 days of money that she should be putting into her purse in order to spend on the kids?

I'm confused.

anguk

RainbowDreamer wrote: »

I am not in a refuge no. He is not allowed near my house. If he comes to the house he gets arrested.
I agree with what your saying. And as mentioned it has been saved, so I can give him benefits for everyday he has the kids.

I'm confused. You mentioned that there's a police investigation and while that's ongoing your ex has temporary custody of your children, but then you say your ex isn't allowed near your house and if he does go to your house he gets arrested?

I'm confused about what or who the police are investigating and why they are involved in this custody battle? If it's the ex they're investigating then why on earth have the courts given him temporary custody of the children?

Northern_Princess

As much as I empathise with your situation, I always keep an open mind as to the other parents situation. It's all too easy to come on a forum and belittle the other parent. However, I have read your threads and do hope this full situation is sorted soon for the sake of your children. I can't help but agree with another poster on the children should come first and from what you have posted in this and other threads the children do not seem to be a priority here. The benefits they bring in do though, which I find rather upsetting. I hope for those innocent children you both come to some agreement for their future.

Gigervamp

RainbowDreamer wrote: »

All CB and TC have been put into a savings account atm. I have been told by ss and solicitor I should not be giving him any money, due to the court result being temp and because he does not pay maintenance.
I am following advice from a professional. Surely thats what I should be doing.

Northern_Princess wrote: »

I can't help but agree with another poster on the children should come first and from what you have posted in this and other threads the children do not seem to be a priority here. The benefits they bring in do though, which I find rather upsetting. I hope for those innocent children you both come to some agreement for their future.

Am I missing something? I've also read the other threads (including the deleted ones) and I don't understand why people are going on about the benefits, as OP has said (quoted above) she's not using them.

RainbowDreamer

The police investigation is against my bf due to false accussations. Ex has temp residensy til police have an outcome. Case should be closed soon due to recent evidence provided showing lies and emotional abuse towards eldest.
It was an intrumin hearing to get the children returned as they hadnt seen me in 3 weeks. In such a hearing the judge goes off facts & does not discuss ins and outs until the big court hearing. So ex got temp residensy to allow Cafcass to do their job and to allow police to come to an outcome.
I put my children first. Yes I go to the gym when the kids are not here, but that's way better than staying at home depressed.

Ex is not allowed at my home due to being arrested for trying to force entry to my house. We now meet somewhere very public with cctv to drop off / collect the children.

Dunroamin

Gigervamp wrote: »

From what I've read, OP's ex has the kids ONE day more than OP does. The CB and TC that she's getting are going into a savings account for the children or to be given to the ex if needs be.

Why are you quibbling over one days worth of money which isn't being spent by the OP, let alone the 3 days of money that she should be putting into her purse in order to spend on the kids?

I'm confused.

Because the child related benefits should be claimed by the parent who has the children for the majority of the time. The husband should be claiming and she should be paying him a small amount of maintenance, exactly as if the situation was reversed.

RainbowDreamer

Dun.. in temp residensy this Is not the case, because the situation will change soon.

Dunroamin

RainbowDreamer wrote: »

Dun.. in temp residensy this Is not the case, because the situation will change soon.

May.......