dannahaz wrote: »
It's not easy to deal with this, especially as it has been going on for some time and the people probably genuinely have not considered that they are one in a line of people doing this
I;m assuming that the outcome you want is for people to only visit for a couple of days, or else stay in a B&B (rather than you actually wanting people to reimburse you)? I;m also assuming that you don't really want to make people feel stupid, and that you still want to see them?
If so I suggest you write a letter/email to *all* offenders - email is good because you can have a long string of email addresses to demonstrate the size of the problem, but the problem with emails is that people skim read them and may miss what you say.. It must be the same to everyone.
I've tried to express things so that you get to the end point you want without upsetting people any more than you have to.Hi everyoneWe're writing this to everyone who regularly spends time with us over the holidays. Over the past x years we've been really lucky to have you all want to come and visit us in the summer, ranging from overnighters to two weeks.We love seeing you all, and I hope you know this from the time we spend with you when you come, showing you around, looking after you etc. We do understand that you like having a bit of a holiday by the beach while you are with us. What you probably don't realise is that we have a succession of visitors. Your visit is one in a whole long line of people coming to stay and enjoy the beach. We love seeing you all. What we do find a bit difficult is that it feels as though we spend our whole summer looking after one set of visitors or another, showing people around, and catering for extra people for a total of several months a year. It's not just the extra cost, it' s also being on "host duty" so much - it's starting to feel like we're running a hotel.I'm a bit embarrassed to be writing this letter, but I've done it because we just can't afford to have another summer like the last couple of summers.We'd still love you to visit us. This letter isn't asking you not to come and stay. What we are askingsuggesting is that if you're planning to be here for more than a couple of days this year. we'd be happy to recommend a good local B&B/hotel that you can use. We hope you aren't offended by this letter. It's been very difficult to write, and I've no doubt I haven't expressed myself as well as I could. Love to you all, and I hope to see you soon
juliamarsh wrote: »
I think the letter suggested by dannahaz handles it pretty well. When I was in this situation, after a couple of such visits left me exhausted I just told them they could only stay for a couple of days the next time they asked. I occasionally stay with relatives in Cornwall for a few days but would never expect them to wait on me. I bring with me milk, bread, butter and anything we might eat for breakfast and make sure I replace it throughout our stay, plus a plentiful supply of wine to share with our hosts! During the day we normally go out so are not around to eat lunch, and I make sure that I buy the ingredients for and cook at least a couple of meals for everybody over the course of our stay. I go out of my way to do the clearing and tidying up whether it is our mess or not and help them out wherever I can to avoid putting an extra burden on them. I take them out to dinner before we leave and also buy them a gift to say thank you - hopefully something that they like!! I am very grateful to them for welcoming me to stay and consider it the least I can do to show my appreciation,as well as letting them know that they are always welcome to stay at my home whenever they wish. This is just basic good manners and it sounds as if your relatives are totally unappreciative, even if unintentionally. Either be upfront about how you expect them to behave if they are too selfish to do it without being asked or limit their visit to a couple of days so that you get to catch up with them but are not worn out!! Best of luck!!
What it means for your gas & electrity
What really makes a difference?
When you add £50 to gift card balance