When I asked for luck I didn't mean the bad variety!!!

smarties84

That's not daft at all big hugs to Hun must b hard xx

grannyx2

It's one of the most natural feelings in the world. Be kind to you honey

((((Lucky))))

Granny x

amber03

Sorry to say this but everytime these children have a special occasion or birthday you will probably be thinking about your loss and what would have been, this is natural, don't be hard on yourself as you are a lovely caring person.xx

please-let-me-be-lucky

Thank you everyone :A Xx

Buffythedebtslayer

yep, what they said, logically it is really normal to feel like that


big hugs. XXXX

liltdiddylilt

You're welcome for the post Lucky. Sorry there haven't been more recently. I know all too well the feelings you're going through right now with regards to other people having babies/scans etc. It seems like almost all of my friends are pregnant or trying right now.

Amber03 is so right as well. I continually have small jolts back to what would have been my 'first' baby. I try my damndest to think positively about life. I do after all have my amazing Jellytot, but it's hard not to feel a little bit jealous eh?

It's natural! Just you make sure you take care of you and give your beautiful boys plenty of squeezes..

*sneaks off to peek in on Jellytot again*

Pole-dancing polar bears tonight xx

please-let-me-be-lucky

Hugs back at ya Buffles!

Lilt, pole-dancing polar bears eh?! Will be like looking in a mirror :rotfl:!!

I now have 4 angel babies and I remember dates etc for every one. I also have 2 gorgeous boys with me though and I know that makes me very lucky. It's 2 more than some people have. I also know it would have been very hard work having 2 more children on top of everything else, but I still would have loved it. Xx

liltdiddylilt

Of course you would. We were put on this earth to nurture. Four is a huge burden to carry around with you. I'm not a huge believer in a 'him upstairs' or anything like that but I sincerely believe that they're looking down on you. Sending lots of love your way...

And do not joke about the mirror :eek: where do you think I got the idea from?!?!

grannyx2

Oh honey as hard as you know it would have been you also know they would have been loved. 4 lost loved ones is a big burden to carry and as Amber says certain events are going to bring those feelings to the fore.

My darling twins were born on the exact same day and in the same ward as my niece, not that I knew her mum or OH at the time. Every year, despite loving her very much it hurts to see her celebrating when my darlings never even celebrated their 1st week.

I know if they had lived I wouldn't have had DS and therefore wouldn't have my darling DGC but despite that I still grieve for them. I like you remember my 5 lost loves and remember the dates they should have been born/were born as well as the dates they left me. It never goes away but it does get easier.

It's still very raw for you as the firsts are all part of the grieving process

Give your DSs an extra big squeeze and remember if you weren't affected by this you wouldn't be the kind caring person that you so obviously are

Lots of love and hugs

Granny x

please-let-me-be-lucky

Aw granny, that just made me cry! In a good way though, as it summed it all up perfectly. I'm so sorry that you have the extra burden of your niece's birthday being the same day.

Hugs back to you too Xx