Partner in severe debt

alastairq

I respect your opinion but in the 1st post you talk about you wanting to have money for yourself and it being about you and your daughter. Well it isn't- it's about you, your partner and your joint daughter (you used the word my not our which was interesting) In a relationship it's not about what is yours and what is his. It's about what you have together and that includes a lovely child. You also use the word I and not us.

So. Is there anyway by selling what you both have, looking at any assets, selling your cars, you getting a part time job at the weekends or a full time job, him doing overtime or getting another job etc etc that you can help him avoid this?

I think the subject of your first para has been put to bed.

[the OP has already admitted the first post was typed whilst under some emotional stress]...

secondly....I take it from your tack that you are very much against the idea of Bankruptcy?

What you suggest as an alternative is, IMHO, not viable as a couple bringing up a young family.

Especially so as in this current economic climate, jobs, overtime, extra work is quite hard to come by.......and doubtless would have been tried by the OP's OH previously?

And, is it really fair, on the rest of the population desperately seeking any sort of work, to encourage one individual to deprive several others of the ability to earn?

In the end, what the OP has to decide is, despite the high moral stance [foolish?] acquired by spending every waking hour frantically scrabbling together a meagre sum....at the expense of a reasonable family life......none of us has a crystal ball to gaze longingly into [ambition?]....thus, a couple of years down the line...perhaps when a sibling comes along......and the ability to purely and simply, earn money is [promptly zeroed....BR may well then prove to be the only viable outcome.

Better now, than putting off what is probably the inevitable, later.

[Sound, 'business' sense, apparently....if the Government is anything to go by?]

debtinfo

The sad truth is that regardless of any moral concerns, because of the way credit scoring and referencing works that going bankrupt means that you are more than likely going to get on the housing ladder quicker than if you go into some sort of reduced payments scheme to pay of the debt.

Bit like you could be back walking quicker by chopping of a gangerous foot then unertaking a long treatment to try and stop the growth

sundays

I understand how you have been feeling, it would appear, that he had totally kept you in the dark of his debt, and had gone along with plans that he could prob never deliver in the long term, so for a better word you are feeling duped.
To many debt is a scary place to be, some will not sleep if they owe 50 pound never mind 40k.

My advice would be to put up a SOA of both incomes and see what advise can be given.
My main question would be if he does get a IPA, how close will the OR keep an eye on your finances, i say that as i understand he will need to declare details up to three years and if refuses or doesnt the OR will assume 50 percent of costs are met by you.
So if you circs improve you will prob almost suffer as a result of his BR.

Im assuming that he must have defaulted on his creditors, at the point he does or has his credit ref will be stuffed, so DMP, IVA are pointless unless assets to protect so BR may be the long term answer.
To avoid a IPA would be putting your plans slightly on hold till the 12 months has passed or close to.
It does go quite quickly.

Its a tough one , but i do think put as much infor up and see what can be advised on.