Wedding job for future wifes uncle

redpete

cazziebo wrote: »

ok - I have to ask - what's a groomsman?

And what is the 'job' they do?

Best mate as Best Man, who provides own outfit. Maybe 4 other mates / family as Ushers (also provide own outfits).

Everyone else is a guest, and they all provide their own outfits.

koalamummy

This may not be at all helpful but from the initial post it sounds like at least on the Bride's side it is very much a family wedding? As the man in question is a father, possibly a grandfather, could you create a role specifically to oversee matters relating to child guests? Maybe menu planning, or favour picking, or the multitude of other matters that could make attending a wedding stressful for families.

I have seen this done before where the responsible party actually organised a mobile ball pool/ kiddy gym type thing which allowed the endless speeches to continue without a hitch.

elvis86

adamg wrote: »

Her dad was groomsmen at his daughters wedding, so my oh expects for him to do something

I'm afraid I don't get it?

Will her uncle see his 4rse if he's "only" invited as a guest and doesn't have a "job". How old is he? 5?

Nicki

If I was invited to a wedding, I'd be happy to do a "real" job or to be just a regular guest with no duties, but would be irritated to have to spend my day doing a made up job rather than enjoying myself and socialising with other family members who I hadn't seen for some time. So personally I would be delighted to do a reading, be an usher or a witness to signing the register, but be a bit narked at handing out buttonholes or orders of service, or having to look after all the kids of the family during the speeches.

elvis86

Nicki wrote: »

If I was invited to a wedding, I'd be happy to do a "real" job or to be just a regular guest with no duties, but would be irritated to have to spend my day doing a made up job rather than enjoying myself and socialising with other family members who I hadn't seen for some time. So personally I would be delighted to do a reading, be an usher or a witness to signing the register, but be a bit narked at handing out buttonholes or orders of service, or having to look after all the kids of the family during the speeches.

I just can't understand why a job has to be "made-up" for a grown man?

"Now, Uncle Colin, you're going to be our chief coat-hanger-upper and tidier, do you think you can be a big boy and do that for us? That'll keep him occupied whilst we get on with the speeches..;)"

My mum stopped treating me like that when I was about 7?!:D

cutestkids

Well I really have to say thank you to the Op for this thread,you have reinforced my reasons for not getting married although my partner and I have been together for mor ethan 20 years.

The whole nonsense about, groomsmen, bridesmaids, ushers, speeches and a whole lot of money for nothing is exactly why we never got round to it, we did toy with the idea even went so far as the engagement ring but to be honest coud not face the whole wedding thing.

Try taking a step back with your bride to be and remembering what a wedding is really about.

The actual only important part only lasts 5 mins when you are saying your vows.

whowants2brich

My uncle at our wedding was invaluable. We had a list of things to have for the day, from rings, speeches, decorations, right the way through to the CD for the first dance. Then realised that we I wasn't going back to my parents before disappearing on honeymoon, and the suitcase with our tickets, passports, and the CD with the first dance on - was all in a suitcase that my parents forgot to throw into their car.

My uncle was on standby to go fetch the aforementioned suitcase, and meant that those key to the events were able to remain at the venue at all times. Nobody noticed his absence, but he knew that with the right keys, directions and a bit of time, that he was able to save the day. Should the need arise.

My suggestion is that everyone picks someone who can be trusted, who is not drinking and has a car, and would be willing to do "fetch" if anything is forgotten.

PS my wife left half of her things in her sister's car - miles away - and ended up going on honeymoon without many basic things. It's funny when looking back, but could've screwed everything up...

Errata

In my family all the uncles have the job of getting a bit tipsy, a bit maudlin, doing some dad dancing and arguing about football. I thought that was quite normal until I read this thread

adamg

Thank you to all who have given an answer to my question, to those that are clearly spinsters etc if I wanted pros and cons of getting married i would have asked!

euronorris

adamg wrote: »

Thank you to all who have given an answer to my question, to those that are clearly spinsters etc if I wanted pros and cons of getting married i would have asked!

Wow! That was rude. Especially after you asked people on here for their opinions! Crikey!