Daft, silly or embarrassing things you have done?

cherub1965

where to start........
i always keep my mobile in my bra if i havent got pockets.was stood in the dog area chatting to a rather dishy bloke,phone decides to ring. i ignored it only for it to start ringing again,bloke was staring at my chest now, had sussed where the ringing was coming from. i laughed,made a joke of it and fished the phone out from between my humungous boobs. forgot i also had my doorkeys and dog poo bags in there aswell. his face was a picture when they fell on the floor in front of him. he'd scarpered by the time i finished the call.:o
few days later i was in doing housework,bedrooms first,was chucking all the washing downstairs as i was working,asda man turns up with my shop, i leg it down to open the door.he kept looking behind me and stifling a grin. when he had gone i turned round to see a pair of the most huge knickers,proper harvest festivals [all is safely gathered in] ,a real mixed wash accident type of colour kept for TOTM. they were hanging on a nail in the wall where i had taken a picture down to repair the frame.couldnt be the black lacey ones i had thrown down aswell could it?? ohhh no!!
another one. feeling rather fragile after a night out i asked my son to get my phone and purse out of my bag for me so he could go the shop. he said he couldnt find my bag anywhere.i got up to look,no bag......rang the taxi firm,pubs we had been in,my mates who had been out with in case they had picked it up.l was panic stricken.didnt occur to me i must have had my bag to get my keys to get into the house and money to pay the cab.
later on sobered up i went to put a wash on,opened the machine and all my clothes including shoes and handbag where in there.thankfully i had a couple of dark items to wash or i would have just switched on without opening it.i could go on all day......

lottie_no1

I am so glad that I am not the only one! A few of mine are:

Getting into a random car after a night out thinking it was a taxi! To be fair my auntie said 'ooh that looks like a taxi' so off I toddled, opened passenger door and sat down and said 'are you our taxi'. Cue nervous looking elderly gent in the drivers seat and my auntie and uncle wetting themselves laughing from the proper taxi!

My mum once put the electric kettle on the gas hob!

My grandad, stepmum and sister all have a habit of getting their words wrong. Grandad used to sing 'Paint the roses' instead of 'Paper roses' and my stepmum loves admiring ceramic views (scenic)!

wyebird

Having Sunday dinner with a group of friends, was absent mindedly rubbing the material on the dining chair. Happened to glance down to notice that I was rubbing my friend's husband's thigh :eek: :eek:

TheConways

My mother was killing some time before an interview in a major department store in Leeds... With her mind on her interview, she tried three times to climb the "down" escalator, until she was kindly confronted by the woman from the Lancome counter who suggested she might want to try an alternative escalator.. They'd been watching her all along!

pearl123

wyebird wrote: »

Having Sunday dinner with a group of friends, was absent mindedly rubbing the material on the dining chair. Happened to glance down to notice that I was rubbing my friend's husband's thigh :eek: :eek:

:rotfl::rotfl:Good one!

Waffle_On

Not knowing Birmingham well, I was trying to drive to Broad Street soon after they started work on the new Bullring. I ended up driving along a very narrow stretch of road, single carriageway with fencing on either side - it must have been at least half a mile long. It was only when I finally came to a roundabout that I discovered it was one way and I'd gone the wrong way!

DylanO

During a particularly petty bout of loo roll warfare in a houseshare at university, I'd be used to carrying my loo roll to and from the bathroom whenever I needed it.

One night I was on a date at a gorgeous restaurant, with the most delicious food when I needed the loo. I'd been, finished, washed my hands and walked back to the table clutching a nearly full roll of lavatory paper. I sat down, placed it next to my drink and carried on the conversation completely oblivious as to what I'd done until the waiter came over with our desserts and asked me to move it so he could put the dish down.

I've never been so embarrassed.

billa_champion

A few years back there was a birthday card doing the rounds at work. I duly signed it too - with looks of horror on my colleagues' faces. I couldn't work out why and felt really paranoid for the rest of the day. I realised why, the next day, when they handed the card to me!! They still laugh about it to this day!

Zimm190

Zimm190 wrote: »

I'm embarrassingly bad at jokes, both telling and hearing them. My poor husband has his work cut out.

Him: Ok, got a joke for you, you ready?
Me: Yep, go on!
Him: Ok. Doctor, doctor...
Me: Who's there?!
Him (shaking head in despair): Nevermind.

Ah ha, karma! Yesterday OH was at work and job interviews were being conducted. They brought a candidate round to meet OH, who said she'd had to tell an on-the-spot joke in the interview. OH asked her what joke she'd told.

Her: Oh just a silly one. Knock, knock.
OH: Who's there?
Her: Will you remember me in a year?
OH: No, probably not.


He said she looked a bit abashed and just said "Oh." and he was embarassed when he realised his mistake!

billa_champion

Oh another one. When my DD was about 10 months, me and the missus went shopping for a new cot for her. We looked at a few on the shop floor and I decided that I'd put my DD in one to see if she 'fits'..!!! I put her in and CRASH! BANG! the whole cot collapsed around her. Queue apologies and a swift exit. 8 years on and I'm still reminded about it at any opportunity by my wonderful wifey!