Daft, silly or embarrassing things you have done?

atrixblue.-MFR-.

my embarressing moment (i have had several over the years but this one will stick with me for the rest of my days).

i worked as a contractor for our local water authority looking for mains water leaks etc etc,
we had a ver cramped combo van, this was our office, canteen and you guessed it the back was a toilet on times.

i had eaten a very hot curry the night i was due to go out on a night test, on the way into cardiff we had stopped to get a bite to eat in mcd's on excelsior road as we were working the area. my work bud had a bite to eat and still feeling peckish had a double cheese burger chicken sandwich and 12 chicken nuggets a coke (wouldnt believe im only 9st would you), we ate up when we get a call we have go meet our area manager at caerphilly mountain's snack shack, we get there, have a chat then take a road down into cardiff, on the way my guts start rumble then started to hurt like i had trapped wind, i started to sweat feeling really hot under the collar i feels the workings of the nights curry wanting out, i try in vien to get my work bud to stop somewhere so i could drop the ducks at the pond so to speak, we missed on rest stop as the hedgline was overgrown further down was a sign to another picnic area after releaving some pressure my work mate thought it best to get me there as soon as possible, so we get into the parking area i'm out like a shot and into a field i think is rather secluded from view of the road, my work mate turn lights off and all is pitch dark (he didnt want to view it after he had a smell of it 2 mins prior) i'm there crouched when the whole field get lit up like its sodden millenium stadium, there were about 12 cars there all who decided they wanted to leave at the same time!!.

ive gone into a shop came back out, went to get into my car when my key fob didnt work im scratching my head why trying the door handle, then look to my right hand side and see the lights flashing as my car is reacting to my fob, yes it was another car of same colour and shape and the fella behind me saying what you doing to my car??

part of my old job was to speek to home owners about internal leaks if we found them, i approached one house that had a large set of wroght iron fencing with the large latches on the gate i get through in the garden when a women answers i go through what i was there for and what we were doing outside and etc etc, we both walk back the stop tap outside to explain when my pocket of my trousers cought on the latch of the gate and tore them off me i ended up with them round my ankles and me plantedface down on my front with my backside in the air at this poor lady.

had trouble with my bowels one morning when i rushed into the lavetory at a bus station near where i was working, i burst through the door into the nearest cubicle done my thing but notice something on the cubicle walls and doors, jenny loves liam, kelly is Biatch, yes i ran into the ladies, wanting to get out without being seen in there i got up quick smart opened the cubicle when 4 ladies walked in i screamed went back in the cubicle they screamed and ran out running i made the best of and rushed out only for my work mate to be standing near the door of the WC's peeing hiself laughing at me knowing i had ran in the wrong one.

i went for a night out with the OH, sat at the table in the restraunt, ordered then went to the loo came back sat down then looked at this woman who resembled nothing like my OH and as i sat down said of how i peed like a race horse! OH wasnt impressed sat at the next table!, and had horrible look for the remainder of the time off the woman at the next table.

took a dvd back to a retailer used the quick deposit box turned round and tried opening my car with the dvd that was supposed to be in the deposit box! had to go inside and exchange the dvd for my keys!

Zimm190

I'm embarrassingly bad at jokes, both telling and hearing them. My poor husband has his work cut out.

Him: Ok, got a joke for you, you ready?
Me: Yep, go on!
Him: Ok. Doctor, doctor...
Me: Who's there?!
Him (shaking head in despair): Nevermind.

FattyBettyBoo

On finding out she had no eggs left my sister and her OH decided to go to Cyrus for donor aggs and IVF. I pointed out that there was a good chance of twins with IVF as they implant two eggs at once and asked if she would cope with twins. She replied that her chance of having twins was even higher than most people as well as twins run in our family!!

Many years ago and friends and I planned a spontaneous night out, but I had no money. Decided to try and get some money for an old bracelet I didn't wear anymore. Went to town and asked a random stranger if they knew where the !!!!!! shop was - what I meant was pawn broker!

emmaBZ

i was in the supermarket at the checkout when the young lad serving me complained off a mouth ulcer....

so i told him to try ANUSOL......as it was really good for mouth ulcers ect.....

he looked at me like i was crazy and said REALLY ???

anyway it wasnt untill i was getting in my car that i realised i had said ANUSOL INSTEAD OF ANBUSOL !!!! it took ages for me too stop laughing and be able to drive my car....:rotfl::rotfl::rotfl:

pulliptears

This made me laugh today...

My next door neighbour is in her late fifties and has been widowed since she was 30. She's lived in the house for the last 30 years. Many many years ago she dated a man who being helpful decided to decorate the upstairs bedrooms for her.

Fast forward to now and NDN has decided the time has come to have her bedroom revamped. She's been ever so excited all last week and when the young, male decorator turned up on Monday and started stripping the walls I even got a text from her telling me how excited she was.

She called me this morning mortified because as decorator was stripping the bedroom wall, unbeknowns to her, the ex from 20 years ago had inscribed on the bare plaster "I F*****D NDN HERE

---

>" with the arrow pointing at the bed. I was in fits of laughter, she, now a much older woman is completely horrified, sent the decorator home for the day and set about painting over it

Slinky

I don't know how I managed to forget this one....

Several years ago I worked in a hotel where there was staff accommodation in a block next to the carpark. One night I nipped along the corridor to the loo in the middle of the night, without taking my room door key with me. My window was open and my room door blew shut, leaving me wearing only a very short nightie and equally short dressing gown over it, with nothing on my feet.

Knowing nobody in the adjoining rooms (I'd only been working there a short time), I didn't feel I could knock on a door and wake somebody up. So I had to walk across the carpark and a public road to the hotel with bare feet at around 2am to get the night porter to open up the reception office to find a spare room key for me.

At least it wasn't raining....

pinkduvetdiva

The other night I went to put the kettle on the hob.
It was an electric kettle.
:rotfl:

shegirl

A few months back,while making a cup of tea and putting the washing on I put a teabag in the washing machine and a liquitab in my cup...thankfully I noticed what was in my cup before I put water in and drank it,unfortunately I'd already turned the washing machine on by then:o

I've also 'lost' my mobile and tried calling it to locate it....from the very same mobile:o:o

meritaten

I have loads of embarrassing stories - but this one sticks in my mind
My OH was in his first year of Mines Rescue - and the Annual Do came round. He told me the date time and venue - The posh Celtic Manor in Newport. I had my hair done in an updo and borrowed a formal evening dress from mum (too poor to own one or buy one). I got on the coach (transport provided) and it went quiet. I didnt really understand why until I saw what the other women were wearing - Disco Glitz! I was mortified and fled to the ladies - and this older woman followed me in, she said her bluddy hubby hadnt told her it was informal last year and she went to town and wore full evening dress complete with tiara! she was lovely and persuaded me to come out and enjoy -as she put it - a slap up feed'! It was only later when I noticed her sat at top table with the Guest of Honour! she was Lady 'SoandSo'! and she made a point of coming over and dragging me on the dance floor..........and we had a whale of a time! My OH glowered at me all evening - he thought I made an exhibition of myself - but his mood soon changed when his mine manager actually chatted to him on the coach home! funnily enough OH had a promotion a few weeks later!

faerie~spangles

I called the surgery in order to ask for a repeat prescription.

My normal repeat prescription is for lotions and potions.

This is how the conversation went:

Me: " I want drugs!"

Person on phone: " You want drugs? "

Me: "Yes, OMG, no, no, no. I mean yes...
... Can I place an order for a repeat prescription please?

Person on phone: "Date of birth please?" Very business like!

Me: "**/**/****"

Person on phone: "Oh you have x,y and z potions, and, crickey I can't pronounce that."

At that point I burst out laughing as did she.

I got my drugs!!!!!:rotfl: