How to stop the green eyed monster??

vasseur

elfen wrote: »

eBay! If your little ones' lothes are still in good nick, put them on when they have outgrown them and use the money to buy them new(er) ones from there

Yes great idea. I have been ebaying a lot recently. In a semi-shameful way one of the first thoughts that flashes through my mind every time my daughter gets something new is 'how easily will I be able to sell this once she's grown out of it???'...

anna_d_2

I agree with what everyone has said - and I know this is something which I worry about now that I'm once and for all starting this journey.
I have friends in gorgeous houses, with nice cars and lovely clothes who book breaks away at a moment's notice. (I never did that, even when we were spending above our means). I know it will be tough to watch that happen - but I want to teach m children strong lessons and I want to make us financially secure.
In the last few weeks I have been shopping around more - finding bargains and stocking up, not buying things just because they are there but looking for the best price (even on basics like milk/ veg/ bread). I admit I like the feeling. I brought in our weekly shop with loads of fruit, veg and fresh meet for £61 last week (for a family of 4) and refused to top it up during the week and that feels good.

I think I'm going to pat myself on the back every time a monthly payment goes out - thinking I'm one step closer to getting were I'm not so scared all the time. I'd rather feel jealous than ashamed and scared!

LivvyLoo_2

I know exactly how you feel and thats what got me in debt! When I had DD, my SIL had her DD 5 months later. It was a constant competition to buy our children all the outfits in Mamas and Papas and I used to be jealous if she had something I didn't. What really annoys me is that she works 2 days a week as a receptionist, has 3 horses and her child has more than mine. I earn 50k a year working full time and was getting more and more into debt trying to keep up with her.
The fact was that MIL was buying her everything and looking after the little girl every single day, SIL can't even cook, she hasn't got a washing machine and doesn't iron.
I am now budgetting really well and not just buying for the sake of it. Buying what DD needs and making sure I don't waste money on tat. I do everything for my DD whilst working full time and when she is a big girl I will be able to sit back and think she is what she is because of me.

Think of the future and be proud.

xx

rdchick

Another thing for kids clothes that seems to be the done thing these days is swapping and buying stuff off of friends and local people in Facebook. Search something like buy and sell in 'my area' on Facebook and there's bound to be a group. Lots of bargains (some of my friends selling clothes and toys in great condition for peanuts!) and no fees! Xxx

tealady

That phrase "bin envy" made me laugh soooo much, that was me a few years ago.
Well the friend whos bin I envied is working all the hours they can to clear their debts, I now have my bin which I paid cash for.
I had times when I envied what someone had till I realised that I had things no amount of money could buy, health and great friends. I still want stuff but I am prepared to save for it.

Muscle750

I find it particularly hard as my sister whom i hasnt to add has not done a stroke in her life is very wealthy due to her husbands career and they have numerous properties in some very affluent areas of the uk.
Last conversation i had with her it was all on their cruise and how wonderfull it was and the best part of it they didnt even pay for it.
We havent had a holiday now for 4 years ive sold alot of stuff trying to raise funds and stay afloat some years ago our parents helped us out with abit of money as soon as she found out she ripped my head off.
Sadly our mother died some years ago and it was her wish all her jewellery was to be shared amongst the female grandchildren well so far it hasnt and i dare say its in her posession .
Sometimes i find it quite hard not to let both barrels go from a very short distance but so far ive managed to let it go over my head

cottonhead

I deal with it by always remding myself what I do have and that there are a lot of people worse off. Even the people who seem to have it all - they may have bought it on credit. They may be loads in debt. They may have flashy clothes but perhaps their house is in disrepair - they might have fancy holidays but maybe they cant afford to buy nice food. Not everything is as it seems. I once did a funny thing...... we were having lunch in a quite upmarket town. Everyone walking about looked well dressed, plenty of flashy cars about and the like. We were down to our last £50 and when we went to the cash point someone had left their balance print out sticking out so - I read it ! £3500 overdrawn ! Ok we only had £50 but it was our £50. So sad as it seems we picked up any print outs we saw as we walked about that afternoon. Out of the 8 or so we collected only 2 were in credit and not by that much. the others all had overdrafts and some huge ones at that.
I know a couple who have a flashy car and a nice big house in a great area. They run their own business. On the surface all looks great. I did a check on their company finances with companies house - it was for a valid reason - I wasnt just being nosy ! anyway the result was shocking. The debt they owe is huge and the profit they made tiny. So basically they are living on credit and borrowed time. Nobody is going to tell you they are in financial trouble Its embarassing and has a stigma - hence why we all choose to speak here where its a bit more anonymous.
So basically what I mean is dont believe that everyone has it all great. Some do but not the magority. Dig deeper and they probably dont have all you think they do. Even if they have money they might hate their job. Be childless against their wishes, be unhappy in their marriage, be ill etc etc.
Look at the positives and feel excited about how the future might be !