Daydream thread continues.....

Itismehonest

lostinrates wrote: »

What will be will be, indeed.

I have almost driven myself crazy keeping options open and future planning....now I feel que sera sera is far more healthy, if not financially then at least for staying sane.

As I like to say Alfie.... if you lose your windscreen wipers at the safari park then you got to see the monkeys.
I am all about seeing monkeys these days, not preserving wipers.

What will be will, as you say, be .... but sometimes I think it's easier for people like us who have rooves over our head, a degree of good health & the ability to know where we can get our next meal from to say so. To lose the wipers one has to be able to afford a car & the entrance to the safari park.

lostinrates

Itismehonest wrote: »

What will be will, as you say, be .... but sometimes I think it's easier for people like us who have rooves over our head, a degree of good health & the ability to know where we can get our next meal from to say so.

What ever anyone says, having money makes life easier. That's why I see monkeys, but am not trying to bankrupt myself buying my own safari park.

Knowing where your meals are coming from makes everything easier. Knowing you have the skills to get more even more so. Lots of people become day dreamers driven by the fear of that next meal....and self providence. I did. But I am losing that ATM.

Health though.....

Perhaps I was blas! this summer. I really did think I was dying this year. I checked will and financial arrangements and re wrote out all the animals care needs for dh. I even started mentioning nice women we know who would be could animal mothers. . Thankfully all prematurely. I had horrid nights of weeping and stamping and fear, but tbh, I surprised myself at feeling mostly 'calm' about it.

I really did feel que sera sera...not joyful or content or happy...but.....resigned.

When I was very ill before I just knew when they were preparing us for the worst I was not going to let it happen. ATM I feel ok, but I just don't have that fight in me. I am not depressed, far from it. Nor resigned exactly...just.....I am realising whatever we do...with the house...with my body.....there is no sayigng fate will play ball.....and that's ok. I am not a god, I cannot control it. It's admirable to fight and resist, but I am not sure that it's not ok to do the opposite now too.

That sounds rather gloomy. I am not gloomy, I am very happy (tonight dh is here having worked from home, and I am curled happily I against him with a cat on my feet...so in heaven). I am content.

ukmaggie45

alfie_1 wrote: »

i like most people, i love some, but i dont hate anyone severely.
i frown at some, i laugh at some,i listen to some and i ignore others....:D

im just an ageing hippy

:beer:

I'm an ageing hippy too, but I do hate someone with the name of Dave C who is intent on taking this country to hell in a handbasket while giving his mates loadsa money... (anyone else remember LoadsaMoney the plasterer from way back when?)

Spent lots of my relative youth being despised because of my name (Maggie Maggie Maggie, out out out. etc). So Dave, my commiserations for sharing your name with our "beloved" PM.

ukmaggie45

Hugs LiR, I've been feeling my mortality recently too, though not for any specific reason, just the "impending dooms". Glad you're having a nice evening. :j

alfie_1

oh please..... glass half full not half empty.....

in an unselfish way i have what i have through bl**dy hard work and in a lot of peoples books , i have s*d all ! if i compared my status to every joe bloggs in the que at tescos, waiting to purchase my "death sticks", id be a paranoid wreck...
i was a single parent , my sons not a delinquent.
ive never owned a property,so someone has gained from my rents,
i can eat baked beans for a week if need be...and have.
i cant remember the last time i bought NEW from a SHOP clothes.
i struggle to pay bills and feel like i sell my soul sometimes to do it...

so why am i still a happy go lucky enjoying life person...

because i have a life..... and im gratefull.....i dont want to solve the worlds problems, i dont want to get bogged down with worrying about something that hasnt bl**dy well happened yet.
and no im not burying my head in the sand, im being realistic.
my time here is too precious to fill it with negatives.

thus endeth my sermon :rotfl::rotfl:

p.s. LIR is my hero. she endures what the rest of us would fall at the first hurdle at,yet her determination and sheer bl**dy mindedness at not letting it beat her puts many to shame.


ooops .this relates to way back on a previous page.., just took ages to write it :o:o

lostinrates

Nah, I should be nobodies hero. I am just really stubborn.

alfie_1

accept the honour and do as your told or i will disapear into the realms of self inflicted bubble bursting ...........

;);) :rotfl::rotfl::rotfl:

Itismehonest

lostinrates wrote: »

What ever anyone says, having money makes life easier. That's why I see monkeys, but am not trying to bankrupt myself buying my own safari park.

Knowing where your meals are coming from makes everything easier. Knowing you have the skills to get more even more so. Lots of people become day dreamers driven by the fear of that next meal....and self providence. I did. But I am losing that ATM.

Health though.....

Perhaps I was blas! this summer. I really did think I was dying this year. I checked will and financial arrangements and re wrote out all the animals care needs for dh. I even started mentioning nice women we know who would be could animal mothers. . Thankfully all prematurely. I had horrid nights of weeping and stamping and fear, but tbh, I surprised myself at feeling mostly 'calm' about it.

I really did feel que sera sera...not joyful or content or happy...but.....resigned.

When I was very ill before I just knew when they were preparing us for the worst I was not going to let it happen. ATM I feel ok, but I just don't have that fight in me. I am not depressed, far from it. Nor resigned exactly...just.....I am realising whatever we do...with the house...with my body.....there is no sayigng fate will play ball.....and that's ok. I am not a god, I cannot control it. It's admirable to fight and resist, but I am not sure that it's not ok to do the opposite now too.

That sounds rather gloomy. I am not gloomy, I am very happy (tonight dh is here having worked from home, and I am curled happily I against him with a cat on my feet...so in heaven). I am content.

I understand that completely, LIR.
My point would apply more though if, knowing that you already suffer from ill health, you could be as resigned if it were DH that were suddenly to become incapacitated? How would that change your outlook? Presumably you'd find it hard to carry on with current plans just as, if something happened to my OH, I'd find it almost impossible to live here.

I suppose in alfie's case it would be what if you became too ill to drive or to take care of the animogs? Somehow, alfie, I can't see you curling up & saying "Well, if they die, they die. What will be will be". I'd lay odds on you fighting tooth & nail to do something for them if not for yourself.

I think we can all be resigned to our own fate to a degree but I bet we'd all fight under certain circumstances.

It's relevant to this thread in as much as smallholdings & places with land are the realms of the reasonably fit or of those with alternative incomes enabling them to pay others to do what they can no longer manage.
It may be glass half empty but it's things that need to be considered. Being frank to a fault isn't always appreciated, I know. Maybe I'd be nicer if I lived in Make Believe land
I will start by sending you all one of those appallingly awful American-type Christmas/NY letters with the obligatory family photo in front of the fireplace. All the children are budding Nobel Prize winners, the Best In Show cats/dogs/rabbits all clear up behind themselves & we've struck oil in the lake in the designer garden :rotfl:

COOLTRIKERCHICK

what a diff a day makes, no cars or road sweepers in front of the house ( yet)

Davesnave thanks.. so it isnt really a silly thought question, asking where does water go, once its in the ground

Alfie I so wish I could be like you, I just 'bite' at everything, and can not leave things go over my head....I think it might stem back to being bullied in school, so now, I cant let people walk over me..or get away with things that messes around with my way of life..or my passed partying life and recreational activities might have left their mark on me

I really do need to learn to chill out...

Alexelisey

Itismehonest wrote: »

My point would apply more though if, knowing that you already suffer from ill health, you could be as resigned if it were DH that were suddenly to become incapacitated? How would that change your outlook? Presumably you'd find it hard to carry on with current plans just as, if something happened to my OH, I'd find it almost impossible to live here.

This struck a chord with me. When we first talked of moving out to the country 20 years ago, to grow our own food, raise the children etc etc, we had no foresight of the arthritis that would strike DH so hard. Now, in reality, if we take anything on I know I'm likely going to have to do it by myself - digging, feeding, growing, the lot. It's still OUR dream, and I'm hopeful that once we're there he'll be in a better frame of mind which will help the physical side of things, but I'm forced to look at the other side i.e. nothing will change. And even with temporary respite, who's to say he won't get worse in years to come? He's 52. Sometimes I wonder if we really should buy anything with land at all, but that would mean giving up on what we've both wanted for such a long time. Sigh.