Am I childish/confused/paranoid?

ShAnE

I originally came onto this forum to solve a few money problems, but as those have settled I find myself reading this section of the forum, more and more, and people always seem very helpful.

So here is my problem.
I started seeing a woman a couple months ago. Things seem to be going really well, despite the age difference we both have the same sense of humour (including taking the mickey out of each other and being able to joke around together), the same interests, and we just generally got on really well.

Three weeks ago, she introduces me too her children, just a quick hello, how are you, who am I etc... (A good sign, I thought)

Two weeks ago, we go over to her friends house to meet her friend, and her friends bf. (Another good sign I thought)

Last week, we spend valentines evening together, and it was a very nice evening. But since then she's barely said a word too me, she's a very chatty woman normally, but for the last few days, i've barely heard anything from her, i've text her a few times and got a one or two word reply back and that is it.

She went to visit her sister on Thursday, and will be staying until Sunday. She didn't mention this too me, and I feel a little down, because I had some flowers sent to her house on Friday, which will probably be dead by Sunday.

I guess I am just frustrated that someone so chatty and whose company I enjoy is hardly saying a word too me at the moment, and would just like some opinions from more experienced minds.

jackomdj

How old are you? How old is she? Did you behave infront of her friends?

Sagz_2

If you get on as well as you think, shouldn't you be able to ask if anything is wrong?

Hope there's a simple explinationa nd that all is well for you x

the_cat

Why should you be reading anything into it? She is busy at her sisters and probably doesn't have as much time for general chat as usual. Most people would not go and visit someone and then spend lots of time on the phone/texting another person..... it's a bit rude!

There are plenty of problems which may or may not occur without you inventing any! Perhaps you are guilty of trying to find 'signs' good or bad in order to guage how the relationship is going. Try to chill a bit or you might scare her off!

ShAnE

jackomdj wrote: »

How old are you? How old is she? Did you behave infront of her friends?

I'm late 20s she's early 40's.
I was on my best behaviour and we had all had a great time.
She tends to act younger, where as I tend to act a bit older.

the_cat wrote: »

Why should you be reading anything into it? She is busy at her sisters and probably doesn't have as much time for general chat as usual. Most people would not go and visit someone and then spend lots of time on the phone/texting another person..... it's a bit rude!

Perhaps you are guilty of trying to find 'signs' good or bad in order to guage how the relationship is going.

I just find it bemusing, that I can log on to facebook at the end of the day, and see that she has spent half the day sending people messages, and funny pictures, but doesn't have 5 minutes to speak to or text her boyfriend.

I probably am guilty of trying to find signs good or bad to gauge the relationship, is that a bad thing?

Northern_Princess

ShAnE wrote: »

I'm late 20s she's early 40's.
I was on my best behaviour and we had all had a great time.
She tends to act younger, where as I tend to act a bit older.



I just find it bemusing, that I can log on to facebook at the end of the day, and see that she has spent half the day sending people messages, and funny pictures, but doesn't have 5 minutes to speak to or text her boyfriend.

I probably am guilty of trying to find signs good or bad to gauge the relationship, is that a bad thing?

Facebook has a LOT to answer for! Call me an old fuddy duddy but I never understand why people need to share what they had for their dinner/breakfast/lunch on it, hence, why I no longer have a facebook account :rotfl:

If I'm completely honest I've ignored people I have dated if I've been away and needed time to think if I wanted to continue dating them. Why not ask her outright if there is an issue? At least then you'd know for sure where you stand and not be left wondering.

meritaten

youre late 20s and she is in her forties? oh dear - I would think that the people she has introduced you to have all pointed out the age difference! and SHE would be getting a lot of flack!
for some reason a difference of age like this is a no-no! wouldnt be a problem the other way around - but, younger man - older woman, people dont seem to get their heads around.
if you are serious hun - be patient, wait for her to come back and then reassure her! she is probably insecure about your relationship herself.

ShAnE

meritaten wrote: »

youre late 20s and she is in her forties? oh dear - I would think that the people she has introduced you to have all pointed out the age difference! and SHE would be getting a lot of flack!

I was worried about that at first, but her ex was also younger, and the couple we had dinner with also had an age gap, so I don't think that would be much of an issue at the moment.

emsywoo123

ShAnE wrote: »

I guess I am just frustrated that someone so chatty and whose company I enjoy is hardly saying a word too me at the moment, and would just like some opinions from more experienced minds.

there are about 8 million possible reasons......but you are asking the wrong people

meritaten

I have been trying to think how to put this nicely - but I cant so I shall be blunt as usual.
You ACT older - she ACTS younger - but truth is you are separated by over twelve years at least?
and you both ACT differently to your age - I would suggest you both grow up. there is nothing wrong with a relationship with such an age difference - IF you are both mature enough to deal with peoples reactions.

Blackpool_Saver

She is probably playing this game to make you keener, mind games uuugh